Preschoolers working out own conflicts — The Bump
Pre-School and Daycare

Preschoolers working out own conflicts

DS reported to me that he was being hit and kicked by another child. When I asked the teacher, she told me sometimes my DS starts it. I wish she had told me sooner. Nevertheless, I had a talk with DS last weekend, and teacher said DS is no longer acting out. The kids are still pushing him around (literally), and teacher is trying to teach him to work it out by saying "Please don't push me, I don't like that." I know she is trying to teach them to work it out themselves, but if she sees it happen, shouldn't she put them in timeout, report it to the parents, etc.?
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Re: Preschoolers working out own conflicts

  • If it were my child, I would want to know if it is the same kid(s), what are the happenings before the incidents are occurring, and what are the happenings after the incident.  I would find out what their school's policy is for physical behavior.  Make sure there is a plan in place and that it is continually followed.  DS's preschool has it written out in the handbook.  (I don't know the specifics off the top of my head, but it is in there if I ever felt I needed to reference it.)  Minor pushes are more "talked about" with the kids and usually have to change their "color card".  Stronger physical behavior (kicking, biting, etc.) are stricker punishments like going to the principal, calling a parent, etc.  I would worry about minor pushes if it is the same kid that keeps doing it.    
    DD~6 years old~born June 6, 2008 (1st grade)
    DS~4 years old~born November 6, 2010 (1st year of preschool)
  • She might be letting the other parents know. She probably isn't allowed to tell you that. DS was in PreK last year and solving their own problems was part of the curriculum, but the teacher didn't just leave them to it.
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