I can't remember if there are or not. If you are, were you happy being an only?
I saw an article on FB about how women shouldn't feel guilty about being OAD and i really liked what she had to say. Then I read the FB comments and there were all these people saying how much they hated being an only and how they wished their parents hadn't been selfish and given them a sibling, etc. It made me feel so crappy! I would feel terrible if DD resented me for not having more kids but at the same time that's not a good reason to have another.
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Re: Anyone here an only child?
I think some people who are in the loud minority, say that because they may not have such a great relationship with their parents or dont have anyone to vent too when their folks get on their nerves or dont have anyone else to take the spotlight off of them. I can say that I may have been lucky to grow up around my cousins (seriously, at some point in time for what ever reason, I was living with an aunt and a set of cousins... LOL) so, I was able to form a sibling like bond to them (they call me the older sister). I do have that go to "vent" thing when my mom gets on my nerves. And, they run to my mom for everything too, so she can focus on them if she has too (it also helps that I am 300 miles away).
And I hate when these only children make the assumption that their parents were being selfish for just having an only child. There could be a number of reasons why so they should just ask. I know my mom lost twins before me so she said when she had me she was blessed! And when she thought of wanting another one, my dad wasnt being the best guy in the world. When she got remarried, her and my step-dad thought about having one together but decided not too because neither really wanted to start over (my step-dad had children).
Thanks ladies! I'm pretty firmly OAD but those comments really got me. I appreciate your input.
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Oh and also saying "I'm an only child" was my go to growing up when anyone asked "tell me something different about yourself"
I'm sorry that the comments made you feel so bad! I have one brother and he and I weren't close while growing up. We have very different personalities, so we didn't spend a lot of time playing together or enjoying the same types of activities. Having siblings doesn't guarantee a cure for loneliness. It's a decision that needs to be made for you and your family, not for what others may think or pass judgement on.
It had its advantages and disadvantages growing up. I had a close relationship with my parents, our schedule was more flexible, I was pretty independent and self reliant.
But as an adult I wish I had a sibling. I have the most amazing aunts and uncles, and I'm sad my kid won't experience that. As my parents get older I'm scared to not have a sibling to lean on for help and support.
We'll probably only have one bio kid, but also plan on adopting at least one.
Other than that, DH and I are both only children (raised VERY differently) and both had happy childhoods despite that. The older we get and having been trying for nearly 2 years, we are coming to terms with the fact that we may only have or want 1 as well. Nothing in life is ideal, you do what's best for you in the moment and that's that.
And for this reason i want at least two or three kids.
As my husband and I are TTC, we frequently talk about being a OAD family vs having 2. DH has a younger brother and sister. They aren't very close but as they get older, they are becoming more friendly towards each other but are no means best friends.
Together since: May 2005
Married: June 2015
TTC #1 with IVF & PDG/S (reduce the chance of our child being born with Nager Syndrome)
I prefer to have an only child becouse I get along well with only other children. We understand ourselves but I’m a little worried about the isolation that will be created by generational singletons. Our child would not have brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, 1st cousins. Both grandmothers have passed. Grand dads in late 70s. Just a vary small isolated family. Benjamin doesn’t seem bothered by that at all though