Finalization cancelled. >:-(

bumpuser794640 · January 2015

Got a call from our attorney around 6 that BF finally filed his bill of review yesterday. We were supposed to have our finalization hearing tomorrow morning. I'm so frustrated and mad. I'm trying to have some sympathy and understanding for BF, but it is insanely difficult. We've been dealing with this dispute since March. We will have been parenting B for a year on the 29th. I could use some hugs.

hey_its_jenn · January 2015

Major hugs coming your way, hun!!

Dr.Loretta · January 2015

Oh that sucks. Big hugs!

WannaBmomma · January 2015

I am so sorry. Any chance things might change?

beachybride10 · January 2015

So many hugs. I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine what you're feeling right now.

DLpanda08 · January 2015

Oh no! That really sucks. I'm sorry.

Mysterious_wife · January 2015

Oh, I am so sorry. I should have checked here before posting on BOTB. I hope you get your finalization soon. Big squishy hugs

Chele · January 2015

Sending you one big ol' virtual hug! I think that stinks.

oliv0026 · January 2015

Seriously???? I am so sorry! Big hugs for you and I will also be praying for things to work for you...

redandblue · January 2015

I am so sorry to hear that. What a frustrating process. I understand your conflict with wanting to sympathize with BF but at what cost? This seems unfair to you and your little B. I hope you get a resolution soon.

leisemomtobe · January 2015

I am so sorry!! This all seems so unfair to you. I hope things turn around and you are able to finalize soon. Big, big hugs!!

erinmc1 · January 2015

Spooko said:

Oh my heart just sank for you. How can you be that close to finalization and him still appeal? We weren't given a date for finalization until the appeals window had closed. What is he possibly fighting at this point? Does he actually want to parent? Or just not be seen as abandoning his kid? I'm SO upset for you guys. This is beyond unfair and unjust.

This. Do you think he's just being contentious, or that he actually has the will and means to parent? Either way, I'm so very sorry.

isenbergbeth · January 2015

That stinks! Sending hugs your way!!!

Rachel7181981 · January 2015

I don't know what exactly this means but I am SO sorry.

Prayers, hugs, positive thoughts, whatever you need. Please keep us posted. That little man on his bike always brings me a smile.

Wish Upon A Star · January 2015

I am so sorry you are going through this! And to be soo close to the finish line too! Hugs!!!

maryoosa · January 2015

I'm so sorry.

bumpuser794640 · January 2015

Thanks for all the sorries, ladies. I think he really just wants to feel like he tried everything he could to get B back, even though he never helped parent him before he was placed and has never met him at all. It is very frustrating, but I understand (sort of). He is way past the appeals window, but the bill of review is to go back to his original termination of rights and see whether everything was done legally (which it was). This bill was filed pro se, so either he couldn't pay his attorney anymore, his attorney quit, or he fired her. In any case, he doesn't really have any evidence and I'm confident his bill of review will be dismissed at his hearing. We don't have a date for that yet since our attorney has to respond to the filing first, and he just got it at close of business on Thursday.

Wish Upon A Star · January 2015

Keep us posted!!! We hope things move on quickly!!

CaptainSerious · January 2015

I'm so sorry, Gnome. It really does sound like he's just doing what he can to live with himself in the future. Even though he knows it's a long shot, if he does this now, then he can always tell himself he tried everything he could to get B back, and it just wasn't enough.

I would be crushed in your shoes, having thought that all legal possible challenges to your parenthood would be closed tomorrow, and now having to wait. With everything you have shared, though, I think you can be confident that this is just a temporary set-back, and you will be declared B's only legal parents in a matter of time.

Hand in there! All our thoughts and prayers are with you and your little boy, who you clearly live and have been there for since the first day you met him. Much love and support coming your way!

lorifromwi · January 2015

Thinking of you Gnome! We aren't nearly that far along, but getting wrinkles thrown into the plan are never fun (see my re-intro post). (hugs)

sulfa · January 2015

Sorry for the set back.

Hang in there.

IRR · January 2015

Ughh. Gnome such issues are so frustrating. Hope all works out in the end and this nightmare turns into pleasant dreams.

CarolinaGirl2014 · January 2015

So sorry Gnome. I can't imagine the frustration. I can understand where he's coming from. In his mind he may see this as the only way to show his love to B since he showed none before. He's wrong and it's sad he won't see it. It seems that birthfathers process differently and sadly it seems much, much, later than birthmoms. Which is why I believe BS like this happens. I hope he gives it up soon or the court dismisses it. You're amazing for even trying to see his POV.