*loss of child mentioned* Is there anything I can do to help?

Iznik

I found out today that one of my friend's 2 month old twins suddenly passed away. She lives on the other side of the country and we only keep in touch through fb these days (haven't seen her IRL in years). Is there anything I can do besides send a card? I just wish I could help somehow. She's understandably devastated. She also has 2 older children. Thanks

dadalou

Send her a card. It doesn't seem like much but it will mean so much to her. I still have every single card that we were sent. Send gift cards for food (grocery stores and restaurants). Text or email her to see how she is doing. Do this now and in a few months. Then it will seem like everyone has forgotten. Remember her on the big days and actually tell her. She is going to be struggling for a long time.

One thing that was really meaningful to me after we lost Nathaniel was that someone sent DD a present. I don't even know the person.

The jewelry idea is good. Anything with her child's name on it would probably be treasured by her.

Iznik

Thanks for all of the ideas -- I'll definitely send a card, will look into food in their area, and may see if I can find an appropriate piece of jewelry or something as well.

We were in a summer college program together a number of years ago. We were close for that summer, but haven't seen each other since, so we aren't that close.

It's just so so sad.

Missy0483

I agree with a necklace or something in memory of her baby. A friend had a star named after our Blake when he passed, it's one of my favorite things. Another friend gave me a necklace with the moon phase from the night he was born. Our babysitter had his picture engraved on a pendant for me. Ellie's Way on FB sends out free care packages with a necklace with charms like Origami Owl, it has books on grief, a memory stone, and a journal to write in. Project Bears on FB send a out free teddy bears. That's all I can think of now. I'm sorry for her loss :-(

Iznik

Thanks so much to @dadalou‌ and @Missy0483‌ for sharing ideas based on your experiences. I'm so sorry that you've had to feel similar pain