Ten Things Tuesday!

KH826

Happy Tuesday All!

Please share with us any 10 things you have on your mind today. Ready, go!

doodah1013

1. My parents visited last week for the first time since H was born. They stayed less than 24 hours... And they stay in a hotel (because my Mom "needs" to stay somewhere she can smoke). They brought a ridiculous amount of presents (which was nice) but overall the visit was a bit awkward. My Mom did not bring up anything hateful about my beard (which is a first for her)... But she did get me a nice set of blue satin lined pajamas for Christmas (they have already been returned.)

2. A's sister is pregnant. I am so excited for another cousin for H, but am trying not to be bitter that they tried for all of 1 month before getting pregnant.

3. Because I am pumping, I feel like a ravenous beast. I cannot eat enough food. My milk supply came in like a wrecking ball... And I am trying to pump and store so I can stop ASAP.

4. We got a big snow storm last night and I need to get up and shovel the driveway... But my baby and wife are snuggling in bed and I don't want to be away from them.

5. We started our cloth diaper journey this week! We had to get some infant sizes that we didn't have, but buying infant cloth was less expensive than buying another box of disposables...

6. Our dogs haven't eaten the baby! They have been so well behaved. This was a big source of anxiety for us and they are doing great!

7. Our Doula was supposed to come for a post partum visit today, but I am sure we will cancel because of the snow. Kind of bummed... We miss her!

8. I am so thankful we encapsulated our placenta... I only experienced 72 hours of crazy post partum crying and now I feel like a new man! I have so much energy!

9. We are starting to eat a healthier diet again. I really lost touch with healthy eating when I was pregnant because vegetables sounded like eating garbage. I am happy to get back to a more natural diet. We started brewing water kefir again yesterday. I could certainly use the probiotics.

10. I cannot stop taking pictures of this kid. Here are a few.

Amber&Reva

1.  I am also sick and will likely stay home from work again today.  I still need to call and let them know I am not coming but being sick and working with the general public while I already have a lower immune system is the last thing I want to do.

2. I also want to go to the doctor today and see if I just have a bad cold and should wait this out or if there is something else going on.  I have had the same awful dry cough for over a month now. 

3.  That being said when you are sick and pregnant do you go through your OB or can you just go to your normal doctor?  My normal doctor should know what I can and can't take while pregnant right?

4.  Since I am talking doctors as most of you know I have a slightly hypo active thyroid and was put on thyroid meds at 14w pregnant well a doctor finally followed up with my numbers at my 28w appointment and called me back at 31w to let me know I now have a hyper active thyroid.  To say I am annoyed that they didn't follow up sooner is an understatement. 

5.  I am so excited for all the BFPs that have come with the new year.  I am also excited for all the babies that will arrive over the next couple weeks/months.

6.  It is so cold in Mass now.  We got snow Saturday night and I told R not to bother shoveling because they were predicting warm weather on Sunday.  Well the weather wasn't warm enough and now our driveway is a sheet of ice with no warm weather in sight.

7.  My baby shower is on the 18th and I checked the registry yesterday and some people have started buying off of it.  So exciting!

8.  I need to get dressed so I can actually go to the doctor.

9.  I also need to walk upstairs and get my tissues (well roll of toilet paper which is what I have been using as tissues)

10.  Have a good week everyone!

KH826

1. @doodah1013 & @firstcomeslove2013 - Hayden is so ridiculously cute, I can't take it! Keep those pictures coming! I really love reading all of the updates from both of you. I hope you continue to enjoy every second with your little bundle

2. So, I called and made an appointment with the RE yesterday. On Monday, April 6th we will meet with our RE for an FET consult. Part of the reason for that date is that J's mom is off from school that day (she is a 5th grade teacher), and she has agreed to watch Will for us for a couple of hours. She thinks J is having dental work done. We don't want to tell our family about TTC#2. We just want to tell them once we are pregnant again and feel comfy with the pregnancy. This will actually be the first time that anyone other than J or myself have taken care of Will. We have never left him with anyone before. My MIL is my #1 choice for who we leave him with (especially the first time), and we basically picked a date far enough in the future that we knew she would be free so that we wouldn't have to think about other options. We don't know yet what we will do for the actual FET transfer day. I guess we will cross that bridge when we get there...

3. So, I finally got on the scale. And I didn't have a meltdown. I lost exactly 5 lbs between Thanksgiving and New Year's. That's actually perfectly fine with me, since I wasn't really trying very hard (just trying not to gain!). So, I now have exactly 30 lbs left to get back to my ideal weight. I am at my pre-pregnancy weight now, but that last 30 lbs is what I gained over 8 months of TTC and our IVF cycle. I have 3 months from today until our RE consult, and I want to do my very best to lose as much of those 30 lbs as possible. I think I can do it, if I put my mind to it. I would really like to start my next pregnancy at a more ideal weight than I started my last one.

4. I am wearing an entirely new outfit today, and it feels oh so very nice. I haven't really purchased new clothes for myself (other than maternity stuff, and I was honestly dressing a body that I didn't really like at that point) since pre-TTC. My mom gave me a gift card for Christmas, and I went out and bought a few new things for work. I am wearing new dress pants (a size smaller - yay!), and a new sweater, and new ballet flats on my feet -- I feel like a new lady! I actually feel more like "me" than I have in a super long time. I am not entirely sure what that means really. I just feel like I am getting back to a version of myself that I am more comfortable with. I think a lot of it has to do with weight, and also how I dress myself when I am not as heavy. I think getting back into the work routine after the holiday break is good for me too. Oh, and I cooked a real, healthy dinner last night! Salmon, green beans and cauliflower -- my favorite!

5. The flu is apparently going through my office. Three different people I know are out sick today with it. Ugh! I had the flu shot (as did most of my co-workers - we offer it annually for free in the office), but apparently the current strain of flu is resistant to the shot. I have never had the flu as an adult. I am petrified of it!

6. So, I believe that my BIL and his wife are struggling with TTC, and I think it has put a strain on my SIL's relationship with our whole family. They got married 3.5 years ago, and she went off of BCPs right away. They didn't actively start trying for about a year, but they weren't preventing for that first year either. They started actively trying around the time of my wedding (Aug 2012). One note, my BIL is a cancer survivor, and it is very possible that he will be unable to conceive now. They knew this from day 1. He had testicular cancer and had to have one testicle removed. He also underwent chemo and radiation that may very well have left him sterile. Before he started treatment, he went and "donated" for a lack of a better work sperm and froze it so that he would have it for later should he want to have a family. I don't know how much he has frozen, but I don't think it is a lot. Well, my SIL was adamant that she wanted to TTC at home first and give it a while to see if they could conceive on their own. I think it is obvious now that they can't. My BIL asked me over a year ago to tell him all about IVF and recommend our clinic/doctor. I gave him a ton of info, and he seemed happy with all of it, and said he would talk to his wife, but that he thought it was time for them to meet with an RE. Well, as far as I know they still haven't gone to an RE. I think my SIL is very hesitant for some reason. But I know she has wanted a baby for a long time, and it has become obvious lately that it is affecting her that she still isn't pregnant. I'm not sure what to do other than to give her space, and just let her/my BIL know that we are here to talk whenever they might want to. My SIL and I used to be really close, and since I had Will she has been really distant. That makes me really sad, and I want to be respectful and supportive, but I also want her to be a part of her nephew's life and mine! Anyway... it has been on my mind a lot, so I thought I would mention it. Now that we are thinking about TTC#2, I feel like it will be the tipping point for our relationship if we get pregnant again before she is pregnant... Ugh!

7. I think unless some kind of unforeseen miracle occurs, we will still be in our current house for baby #2... at least for a little bit anyway. I know J isn't thrilled about that, and frankly neither am I, but I don't want to wait to have another baby just because we will be a little extra cozy for a short time before we can afford to make the move that we want. Short term inconvenience is not a reason to alter our plan for how we space out our children. I think I am even open to the idea of moving when I'm pregnant... or when we have a newborn... whatever is meant to be, will be. I know I complain about our small house, but it really isn't THAT small... the upstairs is (only 2 true bedrooms upstairs), but the downstairs is really quite big... and now we have two living spaces since we turned one room into a playroom downstairs. Honestly, I think it would be fine for a little while... or at least that is what I am telling myself since I am kind of antsy to get back on the TTC train!

8. I am keeping my fingers tightly crossed for a killer tax refund this year. 2014 was a big year! We had a baby, J adopted that baby (second parent adoption costs are tax deductible in PA), we dropped down to 1 income 1/2 way through the year, we put 6 new energy efficient windows in our house, and we just paid to put a new roof on! With all of that, I hope beyond hope that we have a nice refund. It will make a big difference for us.

9. @Healz413 & @Manada - I am so overjoyed for you both. I know there is still a long road ahead, but I just wanted to say again how happy I am for you and this first milestone. I think of you both often.

10. It is snowing here today. Not a lot, but it hasn't snowed much at all this winter, so it feels like an event. I wouldn't mind one big snow storm this year as long as I don't have to go anywhere in it. Other than that though, I am ready for Spring already!  

KH826

Amber&Reva said:

3.  That being said when you are sick and pregnant do you go through your OB or can you just go to your normal doctor?  My normal doctor should know what I can and can't take while pregnant right?

I was sick twice while pregnant (a nasty cold at about 16wks and an ear infection at 25wks). Both times I called my OB office first and talked to the nurse there. She told me what I could take OTC as well as what to watch for and when I needed to be seen by a doctor. With the first sickness, it was just a cold and I never ended up going to a doctor, and just took OTC stuff and waited for it to resolve. The second time, with the ear infection, after calling and talking to the nurse at my OB's office, I did go to my regular primary care doctor. She drained my ear and gave me an Rx for an antibiotic. I talked to my primary care while I was there extensively about my hesitation to take anything since I was pregnant, and she assured me that what she was prescribing was safe. She basically said the same thing that the nurse at my OB's office had said, and I trusted her. I think it is perfectly fine to go to your primary care, but if you are looking for additional reassurance, calling the OBs office first couldn't hurt. Feel better!  

healz413

1. We did a blood draw at 9:00am this morning for our third beta. They should call between 1 and 3.

2. I'm at work but it's not very busy so I'm having a hard time focusing and distracting myself from the waiting.

3. I remember now why I got so little work done on my PhD over the last couple of years.

4. I have become one of those people who checks the toilet paper for blood every time I pee. It started during the two week wait with me looking for a sign of implantation bleeding (never had any); now I'm looking for a sign of something wrong. There isn't any blood, but that hasn't kept me from looking.

5. Assuming we don't get bad news today, we're going to see Imitation Game tonight with a couple of friends. I'm looking forward to that.

6. It is so freaking cold in Toronto. I know it's January and it's supposed to be cold, but I feel like complaining about it anyway.

7. My boss just talked to me about some potential desk rearrangements when a co-worker comes back from parental leave in March. I don't want to move desks. I recently moved and really, really like where I am now. 

8. I'm feeling nervous that our beta levels are "too high." Obviously I would prefer this to "too low" but it makes me wonder whether something is wrong.

9. My co-worker brought cookies, but I have to wait another 45 minutes before eating to let my prenatal vitamin absorb (i can't take it before breakfast because I take my thyroid medication then). 

10. @Manada took the dog out this morning in the freezing cold and it made my day so much better that I didn't have to do it. She also took her out last night before bed because I was too tired and feeling a bit sick.

JGY

Amber&Reva said:

1.  I am also sick and will likely stay home from work again today.  I still need to call and let them know I am not coming but being sick and working with the general public while I already have a lower immune system is the last thing I want to do.

2. I also want to go to the doctor today and see if I just have a bad cold and should wait this out or if there is something else going on.  I have had the same awful dry cough for over a month now. 

3.  That being said when you are sick and pregnant do you go through your OB or can you just go to your normal doctor?  My normal doctor should know what I can and can't take while pregnant right?

 

** STUCK IN BOX**

I got really sick during my 1st pregnancy.  It started as a stuffy nose and cough, and went on for just ever. I was also very hesitant to take anything, but because I procrastinated, I ended up with cracked ribs from coughing too much and the result was that I ended up having to take way more drugs for that than I would have otherwise.  Long story short .. go to the Dr.

As for which Dr., the way it was explained to me was that your OB/MW will take care of anything baby-related, keeping your health in mind as well.  Your PCP will take care of anything YOU-related, keeping your baby's health in mind as well.

Hope that helps!  Feel better!!!

Karlamo

1.  I am currently battling a nasty head cold while having m/s.  I can't decide is not being able to taste food is better for my m/s or worse.

2.  My anxiety is SKY HIGH as we wait for our next u/s on Friday.  We are hoping for a heart beat.  I'll be 7w exactly.  Last u/s was at 5w4d and they saw a yolk sac.

3. With mamosey's pregnacy we got a heartbeat at 5w5d so this extra wait is making us both very nervous.

4. R has RSV which has been giving him fevers of 103.7 for the past 3 days.  I think it finally broke last night!  My poor baby is miserable.

5. My baby will be 1 next month!! When we were in the newborn haze I thought time was standing still now I can't believe how fast a year went by.

6.  Moms on my BMB are doing themes for their LO's birthday parties.  After talking with mamosey we decided the only thing R is into is boobs.  So Bachelor theme??? You know, boob cake and nipple straws etc...

7. Wouldn't you all just die if we really did that!!!! I wish I was gutsy enough to do it.

8.  Our toliet broke this morning; so our solution? Renovate the entire bathroom.  Currently shopping for vanity's, toliets and tile.

9. I forgot I have a workshop for work this weekend.  It's both days.  I would love to not go but I need CEU's to keep my interpreter national certification.  My cycle is up in Dec and I want them all done before Moka gets here.

10.  Oh yeah, baby's nn is Moka.

ATXmommas

Karlamo said:

/p>

6.  Moms on my BMB are doing themes for their LO's birthday parties.  After talking with mamosey we decided the only thing R is into is boobs.  So Bachelor theme??? You know, boob cake and nipple straws etc...

>

We had this exact same coversation. Z's suggestion: Hooters.

I opted for a generic color theme.

ball.and.chain

@karlamo, my sister has made a 3d boob cake for a bachelor party. Happy to commission another one if you'd like! She could throw in an A-cup smash cake for R...

kristykristyleelee

1. This is the 1st time I am attempting to write 10 things on a Tuesday...and the 1st time I read everyones 10 things (you know, for inspiration!)....and boy am I glad I did! @KH826 your #8 will basically be me next year (with the exception of the windows and roof). I was not aware that the Second Parent Adoption costs were tax deductible - wahoo for that!

2. I did not bring any lunch today - so I have to venture out in the snow for lunch. Not cute.

3. My wife took our dog/puppy for his well visit today and he is super happy and healthy! We already knew this, but he had a hematoma on his floppy ear that ended up healing really good, the vet said that we were lucky - because they often require draining and even surgery sometimes. The vet also said that our 37 lb mutt is blessed with looking like a forever puppy!

4. I am currently 16+4 pregnant, FTM, and I am seriously so excited to begin feeling the LO move. I know it most likely will not be for a couple of weeks...but the possibility exists today for it to happen...CAN'T WAIT!

5. UPS lost a package from Best Buy - now we have to file a claim, wait for them to try and locate it, and if they can't locate it, they reimburse us. Problem is - we ordered a camera (very expensive), that came with a free case and memory card. Thankfully, the package they lost was the memory card and case, and we received the camera. I foresee having issues with being reimbursed for something we technically did not buy. How does a box get lost in between when they tried to deliver it to us yesterday, and last night when we tried to pick it up?

6. I know I already talked about lunch...but since writing that...I have gone from wanting a cheesesteak, to soup, to pho, to whatever the hell it is that I smell that smells so good! Indecisive much?

7. Although yesterday was my 1st day back at work since 12/24, I am already counting down to 1/19 when we have off for MLK day. I just want to sleep, and lay, and watch TV, and do anything BUT wake up early in the morning and forced to be productive.

8. The post office also lost my monthly transpass for SEPTA for this month...so I had to go out and buy one, and send in a reimbursement form from ADP. I am just realizing now that 2 EXPENSIVE things were lost by 2 separate entities in the past 2 weeks.

9. My mom has had a streak of horrible luck, health-wise. In short, she broke her ankle, needed emergency surgery to set it (with 5 pins and rods), and then less than 2 weeks later perforated her colon and needed another emergency surgery. She ended up with a temporary colostomy bag, and then had do have surgery to remove the pins from her foot so that it could heal. She has a long road to recovery (6 months to a year), and has at least 1 more surgery ahead of her (to remove the colostomy bag). This all happened in December - really put a damper on her Holiday spirit. I need to find ways to keep her outlook positive!

10. Now I want pad thai for lunch. Funny thing is, I bet I will end of with none of these!!!!

Have a great Tuesday everyone!

KH826

kristykristyleelee said:

1. This is the 1st time I am attempting to write 10 things on a Tuesday...and the 1st time I read everyones 10 things (you know, for inspiration!)....and boy am I glad I did! @KH826 your #8 will basically be me next year (with the exception of the windows and roof). I was not aware that the Second Parent Adoption costs were tax deductible - wahoo for that!

Yep! I didn't know either until our attorney told us, and we double checked with our accountant -- he confirmed it! By the way, if you are looking for a recommendation for an attorney for your second parent adoption in Philly, let me know. I would highly recommend our attorney. We used her for estate planning too. She rocks!

ball.and.chain

1. BABY BENJAMIN IS A BIG BOY!!! Stats are in from his 6m pedi appointment. After hovering in the 2nd-3rd percentile for weight for the first four months of his life, he is now in the 13th at 15 lbs, 8 oz! And he went from the 18th percentile for height to the 26th (not sure of exact length)! Head percentile went up too -- I think that's somewhere in the 30s (my wife took him and I'm at work so I don't have all the details). Our pedi was never really concerned about him but I do think we all wanted to see some evidence that he was "catching up" a bit and it feels good to see him above 10% in everything. Pedi said he is very healthy and looks great and that we are doing a great job -- which is funny to me because I don't feel like we are doing anything special. I mean, we don't beat him or leave him in a dungeon...

2. I am loving the idea of a boob-themed bday party for R, @karlamo. I know you won't really do it but can you IMAGINE??? I am picturing the photos on FB.

3. I confess that 6 months out I already think about B's first bday party. Since he was born in late June, our plan is to just have a casual cook-out with close friends and family, no big themes or anything because this mom cannot be bothered. And I may have already told my sister (the family baker) what kind of cake "he" wants.

4. Went down to the office café to get a drink and scored a hunk of chocolate chip marble pound cake leftover from a meeting. Obviously I am #winning, but who serves pound cake at a breakfast meeting?

5. I mentioned this in another thread, but we tried putting B to bed without the Merlin sleepsuit and it was a DISASTER. No idea how we're going to transition him out of that thing.

6. I got an unexpected email from my godmother on Sunday. Unexpected as in I haven't heard from her in probably a decade. She was my mom's college BFF and we sort of lost touch with her after my mom's memorial service. Apparently my dad still sends her holiday cards and included a newsletter this year with a picture of B, so she wrote to congratulate us. It was a nice surprise, and I hope we can stay in touch.

7. I'm really looking forward to taking B for walks around the neighborhood and to the park in the spring and summer this year. We took him last summer and early fall but he was so tiny he just slept in his infant seat. By spring he'll actually be able to sit upright in a stroller and see things, or maybe even get pulled in his wagon, and he can go in the baby swings at the park.

8. Did I mention my BFF is coming to visit for a weekend in February? She hasn't met B and I'm so excited.

9. I've started doing ten-minute guided meditations on my phone every morning on the bus (I use the Headspace app). It's kind of nice.

10. Happy Tuesday, everyone!

Jazibel

1. I have been addicted to reading my new book Mazerunner. I was an avid reader but haven't read much in the last few years between school and kids.  The series is geared toward young adults which means its an "easy" read. I've been devouring pages in the few minutes here/there that I have to read.  

2. Owen is standing with his hands planted on the window. I can't believe he started standing at 7 months old.  Kaden started crawling at 7 months old... Just goes to show you how different kids can be.

3. So I feel like I must come across as crazy... Ok I am crazy!  I've gone from feeling certain I wanted to have 3 kids to being on the fence.  I love our life right now, and with all the juggling that happens I really worry sometimes that we won't be able to handle (or enjoy) life with three kids.  EV and I split up a lot and each take one kiddo, making bedtime, bath time, etc much easier.  With three how will that look.  If we had more time (If I was younger) I would just wait a couple of years in between Owen and his sibling and build in balance that way.  We're still going to our RE consult in early March, and I think we'll have a lot to talk about.  EV seems to be on the fence as well. I do feel like we're missing someone, and I do see three kids in our future which is super confusing. I sometimes wish money and age weren't factors.

4. Still having weird brother/sister-in-law drama...  Or rather its so not dramatic because basically they aren't involving us in their life.  They gave us a great Christmas present though (a membership to the Bay Area Discovery Museum). Maybe not as good as getting to spend some time together as a family - but a close second (at least this was the joke EV and I shared when the gift arrived).

5. Owen is teething like crazy. I might break down and give him Infant advil today.  His bottom two teeth look so cute, I see one top tooth poking through and the other side is surely working its way out.  Seeing how much agony these little guys are in from teething makes me grateful I don't have to grow my teeth as an adult.

6. I was contacted about potentially filming a"where are they now" episode but I don't think we've done enough interesting work on the house to be selected. 

7. I really want to win the lottery... I guess I should buy a ticket once in a while....

8. We're talking about a trip to Los Angeles in February to visit our friends and maybe Disneyland, and a trip to San Diego to rent a beach house with my parents in May.  I also really loved Spring time in Oregon so maybe we can take a road trip up that way.

9. So I was using tv shows to entertain Kaden on days when I needed to get things done for the catering/event management company.  I'd turn on Curious George or something and call a client or send a few emails, etc.  Well one 20 minute show once in awhile turned into an hour here or there, into at least an hour 4-5 days a week.  This was not what we had envisioned our media policy to be.  We've also been struggling with negative behavior.  So we nixed the TV and lo and behold better behavior and fewer requests to watch shows.  It makes my day way more complicated but I love that Kaden is back to reading books and playing creatively instead of obsessing on  when he is going to watch the next show.  I'm not saying we're going to do no media forever, but I need to train myself more than anything to rely on different tools.

10. We gave Owen a steak bone with some meat on it the other day and he cleaned the bone off.  

StacyLH24

1. @Jazibel‌ when your original episode aired, I missed it. Well, I found it and DVR'd it and watched it the other day. It was so cool to have you right there in my living room .

2. This girl is irritable, big time. I thought maybe some sleep would take care of that, turns out that I was wrong.

3. Small vent ahead - C went to see our friend that has a toddler and twin babies today. I opted out of a weekend visit and let C go today while I'm working. The last time we went she was so negative and kind of snarky towards us. Every single time we see her I always hear "as a Mom their cries just go right through me". Yes, I get that you're part of the Mom club and we aren't. I can do without the constant reminder, thank you. She is very well aware of all of our infertility struggles. She wasn't happy with her husband and then got pregnant with twins - when she is very knowledgeable as to how to prevent pregnancy. I love seeing the kids, but I can't handle her negativity and other crap right now. See #2.

4. We spent enough on TTC last year that we will be able to use it all for tax purposes. I'm oddly excited about this and hope that it leads to a bigger return.

5. I started loom knitting a scarf last week. I've never done this before and wanted to try something new. I would like for it to be an infinity scarf, so I have a ways to go still. I'm excited about it though.

6. I hope my Gonal-F dose gets dropped on Thursday. I think it might be contributing to my foul mood.

7. Work has been full of crisis situations with clients in the past two weeks and I have gotten them all. I'm so glad I didn't pursue mental health counseling as my full time job.

8. I want to go home and work on my scarf, not go back to work.

9. I'm interested to see what's happening in my ovaries on Thursday. Hopefully my left one will be easy to see. I'm having irrational fears about this cycle.

10. I wish I could wear pj pants and hoodies to work.

ATXmommas

1. @KH826‌ & @Jazibel‌ - I'm sorry to hear your IL struggles are continuing as well. We can only control so much and the rest is out of our hands. I hope resolution - or some progress - for your respective situations this year.

2. I'm feeling pretty blah about my career. I believe in the mission of my agency and respect the work we do, but I'm disappointed and aggravated with the some of the politics and dynamics at the level I'm at. I know this would likely be true of any agency/business doing the work I do. I wish I had found a passion that I could have turned into a career - something that made me excited and eager to go to work. I love the passion and excitement @doodah1013‌ has for his job and am excited that @jazibel is finding success and excitement with her new catering venture. I'm only in my mid-30's, but I already feel it's too late to change careers. Especially to a career in which my income would be even moderately the same. The bigger problem, though, is that I have no idea what I could do that would bring me excitement. I'm good at my job and have earned respect from my peers, so I think I'm resigned to another 25 years of government work.

3. What made me think about #2 is talking to my friend this morning about her pursuit to become a midwife. She has a graduate degree in counseling, but decided to pursue midwifery in the last few years. I admire her choice so much. I also recognize that I'm not willing to make the same choice - particularly the choice to give up an income for a while. I like having two incomes and our life would look drastically different with one.

4. I'm not planning on selling the condo until fall-ish, and I'm already anxious about how we're going to keep it clean enough to show. Fingers crossed that when the time comes, it goes quickly!

5. My older sister is super serious with her new BF. they only started dating a couple months ago, but have thrown out the idea of a summer wedding! She will be 37 next month and he is 50, so it's not like two young kids rushing into anything (or lesbians, haha! Hope no one takes offense to that). Z and I are planning to make a trip to Dallas soon to check this fellow out. I really hope he's the real deal. My sister deserves happiness.

6. I don't get too off track with eating during the holidays because of my dietary restrictions, but it still feels good to get back to my cooking routine. While I'm slender, my belly is still squishy from having a baby and eating better makes me feel better overall.

7. Those fleece pj pants that I called a dud in the Gifts thread - I was wrong. They are awesome. Granted, there are only a few days out of the year that will be cold enough to wear them, but I enjoyed the hell out of them wile working from home yesterday.

8. Anybody have any non-cliche baby shower ideas? I've thought about having people decorate pages to bind as baby's first alphabet book, but not everyone is creative. Hmmm.

9. I'm going to try and delicate some time this weekend to de-cluttering! It's making me crazy.

10. Ash needs another haircut. If we choose to keep his hair short, I'm gonna have to get used to haircuts every 6 weeks as opposed to my every 6 month schedule.

Happy Tuesday!

KH826

ATXmommas said:

2. I'm feeling pretty blah about my career. I believe in the mission of my agency and respect the work we do, but I'm disappointed and aggravated with the some of the politics and dynamics at the level I'm at. I know this would likely be true of any agency/business doing the work I do. I wish I had found a passion that I could have turned into a career - something that made me excited and eager to go to work. I love the passion and excitement @doodah1013‌ has for his job and am excited that @jazibel is finding success and excitement with her new catering venture. I'm only in my mid-30's, but I already feel it's too late to change careers. Especially to a career in which my income would be even moderately the same. The bigger problem, though, is that I have no idea what I could do that would bring me excitement. I'm good at my job and have earned respect from my peers, so I think I'm resigned to another 25 years of government work.

***STUCK IN THE BOX - HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!?!?!***

So, I could have written what you wrote above almost word-for-word. Substitute middle management in a corporate setting for government work, and I am right there with you. I have officially lost that lovin feeling for my work, and I am at a loss for what to do about it. I had an opportunity for a lateral move to another department at the end of last year, but I passed on it thinking that maybe I might have more opportunity for growth where I am now. I don't know if that is true at this point, but the only rewarding thing about my work right now is the paycheck, and that just sucks. I talked to my FIL who I respect a lot (esp about things like this) this past weekend, but he didn't really have any magic words of wisdom for me. I make a decent living (some would say more than decent, but I have high expectations of myself and where I want to be income wise), but I no longer feel challenged or passionate with/about my day-to-day. It feels like a grind now, and I pretty much hate that. Life is way too short to feel uninspired 10 hours a day (I work long days -- you know, high expectations...).

Anyway, I'm with you! If you figure out any amazing alternatives to the status quo, keep me posted!

bfonz619

1. Adorable pictures! @doodah1013 I wouldn't be able to stop taking them if I were in your shoes as well.

2. Hoping everyone that isn't feeling well starts feeling much better very soon!

3. Speaking of not feeling well, I have had several bouts of nausea lately, which, at first I thought were due to not having eaten within a proper time frame, but am not realizing there is no rhyme or reason.

4. Our almost 11 mth old Aussie Kya seems to be marking her territory where ever she can, and it is to the point where we feel like spaying her is going to have to happen.  The problem is that she carries the MDR1 gene making finding a place we are comfortable with spaying her difficult.  We are open to and looking at other options as well, but it seems as though spaying her may be the best.

5. Learning how to knit is something I have always wanted to do, so I am going to start looking for a knitting group that I can join to learn.

6. This So Cal weather is killing me!  Super cold one day and then high 70's the next it is making it hard to adjust and no wonder everyone is getting sick.

7. MW and I have started looking at SUV's.  We currently have a ford explorer which is very old and isn't what we have in mind for the future so we are looking at jeep grand cherokees, toyota 4-runners and highlanders.  We need space for us, one or two LO's and our two medium sized dogs.  Any thoughts or recommendations on other models we should consider?

8. @atxmommas I LOVE my fleece PJ's and live in them during the colder months!

9. Last week at work was so mellow with most of my co-workers being out, I thought this week would fly by, but the days are dragging a little.  Or, maybe it is just because the need for a midday nap has become a must.

10. Our first prenatal appointment will not be until we are 10 weeks which seems like such a long time to wait, especially after experiencing an early loss and wanting to know this pregnancy is going okay.  Since I know when I ovulated, I was planning to go by this date rather than my LMP, but am now considering using my LMP so that we can get in two weeks sooner.  Is that awful?

ball.and.chain

@sdfonz619‌, pregnancy is always calculated by your LMP. While it's inexact bc women ovulate at different times, if you are dating your pg by ovulation date you are 2 weeks off. Unless I am misunderstanding what you're saying?

Amber&Reva

@sdfonz619 you should def. go by your LMP.  As @ball.and.chain said I am pretty sure this is common practice as you really have no idea when exactly implantation occurred.  Yah for getting to go in 2weeks earlier for your first appointment!! I also think you may be able to request a beta blood draw to confirm pregnancy.  Not sure on this one though.

bfonz619

@ball.and.chain & @amber&reva; that makes perfect sense.  Thanks for the input!

JGY

KH826 said:

kristykristyleelee said:

1. This is the 1st time I am attempting to write 10 things on a Tuesday...and the 1st time I read everyones 10 things (you know, for inspiration!)....and boy am I glad I did! @KH826 your #8 will basically be me next year (with the exception of the windows and roof). I was not aware that the Second Parent Adoption costs were tax deductible - wahoo for that!

Yep! I didn't know either until our attorney told us, and we double checked with our accountant -- he confirmed it! By the way, if you are looking for a recommendation for an attorney for your second parent adoption in Philly, let me know. I would highly recommend our attorney. We used her for estate planning too. She rocks!

  We were told that the second-parent adoption credit was not valid for 2013 and were unable to deduct our expenses.  We had that answer confirmed for us.  But I thought it was a federal thing, not a state one?  Good luck!  I do hope you get that money back.

 

JGY

Amber&Reva said:

@sdfonz619 you should def. go by your LMP.  As @ball.and.chain said I am pretty sure this is common practice as you really have no idea when exactly implantation occurred.  Yah for getting to go in 2weeks earlier for your first appointment!! I also think you may be able to request a beta blood draw to confirm pregnancy.  Not sure on this one though.

If you calculate by your ovulation date (using an online calculator) it'll just add 2 weeks automatically.  I have a long pre-ovulation phase (Follicular Phase - I googled it), so I always use the Ovulation Date option on the calculators otherwise my EDD would be off by almost a week.

Or am I missing something and your follicular phase is like 4 weeks long?

 

bfonz619

JGY said:

Amber&Reva said:

@sdfonz619 you should def. go by your LMP.  As @ball.and.chain said I am pretty sure this is common practice as you really have no idea when exactly implantation occurred.  Yah for getting to go in 2weeks earlier for your first appointment!! I also think you may be able to request a beta blood draw to confirm pregnancy.  Not sure on this one though.

If you calculate by your ovulation date (using an online calculator) it'll just add 2 weeks automatically.  I have a long pre-ovulation phase (Follicular Phase - I googled it), so I always use the Ovulation Date option on the calculators otherwise my EDD would be off by almost a week.

Or am I missing something and your follicular phase is like 4 weeks long?

 

My follicular phase this cycle was 16 days, this is why I thought calculating by my ovulation date would make more sense.  However, the way it was explained of not knowing the exact day of implantation makes sense. 

redrockmama

Jumping in on LMP vs ovulation, I ovulated on CD 18. If I used LMP my due date was 4 days off. Not a big deal, but I preferred them knowing so that he could cook as long as possible. If you think you ovulated on day 16 your due date will change by two days, but not two weeks.

trisholio

I am going to try and get this done before the girls wake up from their late nap...wish me luck!!

SheMarie82 my wife and I are foster parents also.  we have two little girls M will be 3 next month and K is 16 months.  They are precious and ornery!  We love them to death and hope to adopt them.

Jazibel let me tell you from experience, having 3 kids is HARD!!!  Especially when they are so close in age.  I know obviously yours won't be as close as mine, but it is really challenging.  When my wife is home and one child is sleeping (or the rare time one isn't home with us) it seems like a breeze!  It was a challenge when we went from none to two, but it is much harder now having three.  It might also be because M and K are both at very challenging ages being almost 3 and 16 months old.

Jazibel I agree with you about the screen time.  It has become a habit that when M wakes up I turn on 'her' shows.  I think I am going to stop that for a few days and see if the whining and melt downs are fewer.

4. Speaking of M, she will be 3 one month from today.  It is also crazy that we have had the girls almost a year.

5. To make a super long story short, my wife was sexually assaulted in November 2008, the trial wasn't until Jan 2011.   Today is the 4 year anniversary of the trial, he was found not guilty.  The not guilty verdict threw us both for a loop.  My wife went into a serious depression and life was rough for awhile, well the good news is that it forced both of us into counseling and we are better people and a better couple today than 3 years ago.  

6. I look at Adalyn and I am amazed that I made that little human.  She is so adorable and I love watching her learn every day.

7. It is now 4 hours later I am returning to complete this :-)  I love that my wife does bath time and bed time routines

8. I am really ready for winter to be over already, I am aware that it has barely started :-(

9. I am obsessed with pumpkin ice cream!  They only have it seasonally and after Christmas it went on sale, I might have purchased 4 containers, lol

10.  Is it bad that I am relieved that we do not have to do a visit with M and K mom this week?  She has court for a DUI and drug charge on Friday, so the visit is rescheduled for next Monday (on my wife's day off so she can take the girls).  I just get tired of her bs sometimes.

This was taken just yesterday, wasn't it?

ATXmommas

KH826 said:

ATXmommas said:

2. I'm feeling pretty blah about my career. I believe in the mission of my agency and respect the work we do, but I'm disappointed and aggravated with the some of the politics and dynamics at the level I'm at. I know this would likely be true of any agency/business doing the work I do. I wish I had found a passion that I could have turned into a career - something that made me excited and eager to go to work. I love the passion and excitement @doodah1013‌ has for his job and am excited that @jazibel is finding success and excitement with her new catering venture. I'm only in my mid-30's, but I already feel it's too late to change careers. Especially to a career in which my income would be even moderately the same. The bigger problem, though, is that I have no idea what I could do that would bring me excitement. I'm good at my job and have earned respect from my peers, so I think I'm resigned to another 25 years of government work.

***STUCK IN THE BOX - HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!?!?!***

So, I could have written what you wrote above almost word-for-word. Substitute middle management in a corporate setting for government work, and I am right there with you. I have officially lost that lovin feeling for my work, and I am at a loss for what to do about it. I had an opportunity for a lateral move to another department at the end of last year, but I passed on it thinking that maybe I might have more opportunity for growth where I am now. I don't know if that is true at this point, but the only rewarding thing about my work right now is the paycheck, and that just sucks. I talked to my FIL who I respect a lot (esp about things like this) this past weekend, but he didn't really have any magic words of wisdom for me. I make a decent living (some would say more than decent, but I have high expectations of myself and where I want to be income wise), but I no longer feel challenged or passionate with/about my day-to-day. It feels like a grind now, and I pretty much hate that. Life is way too short to feel uninspired 10 hours a day (I work long days -- you know, high expectations...).

Anyway, I'm with you! If you figure out any amazing alternatives to the status quo, keep me posted!

------NOW I'M STUCK IN A BOX!!!-----
ETA: nope, I'm not.

I feel like we are living parallel lives sometimes... TTC #2 soon, needing to buy a bigger house, IL issues, and job funk. I feel like I need to give my career options some thought. I'll keep you posted!

ball.and.chain

redrockmama said:

Jumping in on LMP vs ovulation, I ovulated on CD 18. If I used LMP my due date was 4 days off. Not a big deal, but I preferred them knowing so that he could cook as long as possible. If you think you ovulated on day 16 your due date will change by two days, but not two weeks.

This.

Yes you can calculate due date based on LMP or ovulation date, and yes the ovulation date is usually more accurate.  However, these methods are calculated differently.  If you're using your LMP, the number of weeks pregnant you are is the number of weeks since your LMP.  4w since your LMP = 4w pregnant.  If you're using your ovulation date, the number of weeks pregnant you are is essentially 2w plus the number of weeks since ovulation.  2w since ovulation = 4w pregnant, not 2w pregnant.  If you ovulated on CD14, you are considered 2w "pregnant" at ovulation even though you aren't literally pregnant yet.  A 40w pregnancy is calculated from LMP because, I'm assuming, most women don't know when they ovulated.

As @redrockmama said, ovulating on CD16 would just change your EDD by 2 days.  You're still "2w pregnant" when you ovulate, and still 4w pregnant if you get a BFP 2w later.

Bottom line: 2 days doesn't make a huge difference.  Calculate by LMP because that is what the OB or midwife will do.  You can let them know at your appointment that you believe you ovulated 2d "late," but they may not care (or trust whatever method you used to determine this).  Ultimately they may adjust your due date a bit based on ultrasounds anyway, and in most pregnancies it won't matter much.  Remember that most women don't know their ovulation date so many EDDs are probably a day or two (or more) off.

Hope that makes sense!

Esquette

1. FRIENDS IS ON NETFLIX.  (I'm tempted to just post that, 9 more times.)

2. Sweetie and I are going to Florida!  We leave tomorrow night! We are excited for warmth, and sunshine and Disney World and Harry Potter.  It's kind of a honeymoon, kind of a bucket list thing.  

3.  Because of #2, I am feeling completely crazy.  At work, it's a new semester with new staff schedules, with new student schedules.  Lots of small problems to solve, but apparently I have to solve them and always RIGHT NOW.  (Okay, it's my job to solve them, but I still feel frazzled because I'm leaving tomorrow after school!)

4. Inexplicably and suddenly, one of my teeth has been hurting.  It goes TWANG when I bite things.  So I had to miss work (exacerbating number 3) and go to the dentist today.  Dentist fixed it!  It's all better!  

5.  I have been having such mega family drama, and it really came to a head over winter break.  The short version: my father is having an affair and has moved on to a new family with two young kids.  The long version involves swinging, polyamory, lying, a new half-sibling and moving my family home to live across the street from the new family.  It's been a hot mess for me, even living 1,000 miles away.  Over break, I found out how miserable my mother is. I am very angry at my father and considering telling him that I don't want to talk to him for a while.  Possibly a long while.

6.  Despite the griping above, I love my job.  I love working.  I love my kiddos and my coworkers.  I'm so lucky.

7.  I have become addicted to playing a stupid farming game on my phone. It's called Hay Day.  I can't stop.  It's very silly.

8.  All of our Christmas decorations are still up, and I like it.  I the extra light in the house.

9.  In order to cope with the feeling that my family of origin is exploding, we went to Build A Bear this weekend and I made a pretty rainbow bear to squeeze when I'm feeling lost and sad.  My sweetie is the best sweetie.  She takes such good care of me.

10. I'm so happy for the BFPs and the babies around here!  It helps me feel optimistic that there are lots of ways for our little family to grow.  :-)

2MamazInSeattle

1. Simone went to daycare for the first time today (we're only doing 1 day a week right now there). We took her together and picked her up together - she had a hard day they said. But, she is in the midst of a extra-not-so-wonderful wonder week (19) so I'm sure it'll get better.

2. Tomorrow she goes to the nanny, who is an uber-gooey attachment parenting type... this should be a bit of a contrast from daycare and from home for Simone. I have a feeling she'll be happier with the 1:1 though, just my guess.

3. I stumbled on the 'ole diet the past two weeks or so and am sort of back on track. AF is on the horizon which is not helping me eat less, that is for certain. Speaking of AF, may I say my child isn't even 20 weeks yet and this is my THIRD one since she was born. Boo. Seriously.

4. Going back to work has been hard. It's like...who cares? I'd rather be hanging out with Simone. Welcome to reality, 2Mamaz. I'm sure I'll adjust but it definitely has felt just. blah.

5. Tomorrow I do the morning with Simone alone - and our nanny is just 8 blocks away (for those in Sea, she lives literally across from the zoo on 50th). We live on 42nd. It's awesome I can walk her there! Plus, it's giving me a modicum of exercise when I'm struggling this week with my "new normal."

6. I've been cooking at home A LOT and it's been great. Tonight was a WW chicken marsala "stir fry" and it was really good...though the money we are saving not going out is going directly to diapers and formula. Man, I wish my boobs had done me a solid and fed the kid 100%. Seriously, I would not have taken for granted the free food!!

7. Ok, so I know I've rattled on about our Buy Nothing FB page for our 'hood. On Saturday, there was a Buy Nothing Tea and we went. It was SO FUN to meet new people who live around us. And, the best was the 72-yr-old lesbian gramma who raised 3 boys w/her wife. She took Simone immediately and held her for almost an hour! She was super cool and I want to go hang out with her.

8. Those of you talking job/career stuff, I'm with you. My role is going away as of June 30 - I need to decide what to do and it's hard. First off, my boss is staying on to put our program to bed; I feel loyal and that I owe him for having been out for 5 months - but smarter would be to look around sooner. The good thing about working were I do is the 10K open jobs at all times (no kidding) - I mean, one has to be a good fit, right? We'll see where things go - he feels there will be a handful of roles within the new world order and likely one of them would be a good fit for me. But still, hard to dive into the unknown...

9. Sorry y'all are getting snow. It was almost 60 in Seattle today... I was in my fall uniform - semi-stylish hoodie with jeans and boots, and I was too warm outside.

10. We meet our egg donor a week from TODAY. I am getting more nervous as it gets closer. One of my friends said "you are so warm and inviting that I'm sure you'll make her feel totally comfortable." While that's good and all, I thought "but whose going to make ME feel comfortable!?" :P I will for sure give a full report. No matter what we end of thinking of her, I am so incredibly grateful for the chance to look her in the eyes and thank her for Simone. I mean, how do I even do that!? Words seem hardly enough, but they'll have to do!

redrockmama

Ten things wednesday! 

1. I had a migraine all day on Monday. It got so bad that J had to come home from work because whenever I picked M up, I felt like I was going to puke and pass out. I hate migraines and don't understand why there isn't a fix for them yet. 

2. Today is the one year anniversary of my step mom's death. It sucks

3. I can't believe it's been a year. I'm not one for marking the day she died (I know some folks like to do this) but it is a day that I unfortunately will never be able to forget. 

4. I'm with a lot of others and really am not in love with my job. I realize it's pretty rare to love your work, but it's been a lot harder for me to care about my job since M was born. I'd much rather be at home with him, than some job I kind of like/feel is important. I have tried to think of a way to find or enjoy my job more, but it just isn't happening. Sometimes I think more money would make it better so at least I could afford to do some things to improve our quality of life, but I don't want to give up my day off with him to get a higher paying 40 hr/week job. Sigh....first world problems eh? 

5. J think the pedi is going to say M is getting too chubby tomorrow. I think she is going to be happy he finally gained some weight. He was in the 2-5%tile for the first 4ish months. 

6. J and I decided we think we want 4 kids. Before the plan was to each carry one, and then foster/adopt 2 other (preferably siblings). Well now J says she wants us to each carry two. Yikes I'm getting old. I told her I'd consider it as long as we can still foster. 

7. We need a much bigger house for 4 kids. We have a 1000 sq ft bungalow. We can excavate and finish the basement (which is a shelf basement right now), but I'm not sure we can fit 3 bedrooms and a laundry and family room down there. It would add another 1000 sq ft. So, now we are contemplating selling/renting and buying a bigger house. So many decisions. 

8. Related to #7, J's brother just bought a new house and it's huge! They gave us a tour while we were visiting this last weekend. Part of me is jealous and wish he had a big, new, house. The other part would never live in the suburbs in order to have one. 

9. We are planning on TTC #2 sometime in the next 6-12 months. It seems crazy to think about right now, but if I'm going to attempt to get pregnant again for #3 we have to get moving. I'm 32 now and not getting any younger. 

10. I'm jealous of all the babies saying mamama (even if they aren't saying it on purpose). I try to get M to do it and he just laughs at me. 

doodah1013

@ATXmommas‌ There is no "too old"... When we first moved to columbus A and I both took jobs that we HATED. That's when we learned how important being happy in your career is. I took a 10k pay cut to take the job I am in now and we have made it work... And I don't spend every day hating myself.

In other job news... I am thinking about going back to school to pursue a masters in social work. I do love love love my job... But after the news about the young transgender girl who took her own life, I am feeling particularly called to work with GLBT youth. It is scary... But I think I am ready to start moving in that direction. I was part of a GLBT youth group growing up that literally saved my life. I am ready to give back.

trisholio

@ATXmommasdoodah1013 it is never too late.  My mom didn't graduate high school and worked entry level jobs most of her life, she went back to school for social work and graduated with her associates in her mid 30s, she got a job that she loved and worked as a drug and alcohol counselor in different prisons for over 15 years.  While doing that she got her bachelors's and masters degree.  I am not comparing you to my mom ;-)  Just saying it is never too late to make a change.

mrs&mrsk

redrockmama said:

7. We need a much bigger house for 4 kids. We have a 1000 sq ft bungalow. We can excavate and finish the basement (which is a shelf basement right now), but I'm not sure we can fit 3 bedrooms and a laundry and family room down there. It would add another 1000 sq ft. So, now we are contemplating selling/renting and buying a bigger house. So many decisions. 

i'm not sure about other states but when i went through the foster program in NY, you were not allowed to put a foster child in a basement room. you can put your own child in one though. 

bfonz619

ball.and.chain said:

redrockmama said:

Jumping in on LMP vs ovulation, I ovulated on CD 18. If I used LMP my due date was 4 days off. Not a big deal, but I preferred them knowing so that he could cook as long as possible. If you think you ovulated on day 16 your due date will change by two days, but not two weeks.

This.

Yes you can calculate due date based on LMP or ovulation date, and yes the ovulation date is usually more accurate.  However, these methods are calculated differently.  If you're using your LMP, the number of weeks pregnant you are is the number of weeks since your LMP.  4w since your LMP = 4w pregnant.  If you're using your ovulation date, the number of weeks pregnant you are is essentially 2w plus the number of weeks since ovulation.  2w since ovulation = 4w pregnant, not 2w pregnant.  If you ovulated on CD14, you are considered 2w "pregnant" at ovulation even though you aren't literally pregnant yet.  A 40w pregnancy is calculated from LMP because, I'm assuming, most women don't know when they ovulated.

As @redrockmama said, ovulating on CD16 would just change your EDD by 2 days.  You're still "2w pregnant" when you ovulate, and still 4w pregnant if you get a BFP 2w later.

Bottom line: 2 days doesn't make a huge difference.  Calculate by LMP because that is what the OB or midwife will do.  You can let them know at your appointment that you believe you ovulated 2d "late," but they may not care (or trust whatever method you used to determine this).  Ultimately they may adjust your due date a bit based on ultrasounds anyway, and in most pregnancies it won't matter much.  Remember that most women don't know their ovulation date so many EDDs are probably a day or two (or more) off.

Hope that makes sense!

My initial thought when going by my ovulation date is that I would be calculating how far along I am based on that date alone not factoring the two magical weeks prior to where you are not actually pregnant.  This makes sense though.  Thanks!

ATXmommas

doodah1013 said:

@ATXmommas‌ There is no "too old"... When we first moved to columbus A and I both took jobs that we HATED. That's when we learned how important being happy in your career is. I took a 10k pay cut to take the job I am in now and we have made it work... And I don't spend every day hating myself.

In other job news... I am thinking about going back to school to pursue a masters in social work. I do love love love my job... But after the news about the young transgender girl who took her own life, I am feeling particularly called to work with GLBT youth. It is scary... But I think I am ready to start moving in that direction. I was part of a GLBT youth group growing up that literally saved my life. I am ready to give back.

& @trisholio‌

I know you are right! Part of my problem is that I'm not sure what I would like to do that would be truly fulfilling. I really need to spend time thinking about that. Part of my resignation to stay with the State is that I do have fairly good benefits and a decent salary for being a state employee. And once you get to that point in life that you have the responsibility of kids and a mortgage, a significant pay decrease doesn't seem responsible. Thanks for the motivation! I really do want to give this some serious thought.

@doodah1013‌ - I can't think of a better person to work with and have a real impact on GLBT youth. Not only do you have experience to pull from, but you are sensitive, thoughtful, engaging, and have the ability to put abstract thoughts and theories into words that everyone can understand. Look forward to learning what decisions you make.