April 2013 Moms

Thinking about baby number 2...

Hi ladies. I have been away from the boards for quite awhile. But I have been thinking lots lately about baby #2 and knew I would be best coming here with my question.

Any other mommy's on here not sure if they are quite ready to start trying for another but getting pressure from your family and friends? Am I being selfish not wanting to put my body through that again just yet? My husband is ready and our son loves babies so I know it would make him happy.
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Re: Thinking about baby number 2...

  • I really feel that baby #2 is rather a lot like baby #1. It doesn't matter what your parents/friends/coworkers/that dude down the street think, it is all about what is right for your growing family. If you and your spouse are not ready (together!), then your family isn't ready. Talk it out with your spouse and let him understand where you are and where you are coming from. He will (hopefully) support you and your relative "readiness". You are a team, and these decisions affect the team and should be made by the team.
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  • I've been on the same boat... I have a 22 month old and I've been thinking about baby #2. I feel a bit selfish because I feel that my DD still needs me as she still breastfeeds at night and she still sleeps with us. I also just went back to school and feel it's not the right time but my DD loves being around babies, and is pretty independent in everything else. I don't know if it's selfish of me and I know that nobody is ever really ready to have another child.
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  • Its a tough question.  Talk to your husband/partner about it.  If you're both on board, go for it, if your not, wait a few months and revisit the topic!

    Our daughter is 2. I would like to have another baby but my husband is thinking that one is plenty.  Our daughter does not like me holding other babies either and might not like the "competition".   BUT I worry about declining family size.  I have a sister and she and I have always been very close.  My husband has a sister and they are further apart in age and are NOT close at all.  Both my husband and I lost a parent young (read less than 60) and I am afraid of leaving her alone without a support system.  I have a large extended family and I loved having them growing up.  My husband did not.  We each have one sibling and one remaining parent.  Our support system, and as a result our daughters support system, is small.  I feel crazy for wanting her to have a sibling so she has someone to lean on but also a play friend.  She makes friends easily enough (yes that is already evident at age 2!)! I am still considering wanting to have another but now I'm getting to the point that they'll be too far apart in age to be as close as my sister and I were/are!  Its a tough decision!!
  • We are working on it right now. I have the same feelings, that i want my boy to have a good family support system.
    I had such a terrible time after my first was born, with post partum, i really missed out on so many things. I feel confident the next time will be better. Good luck to you in your decision
  • We've had no pressure because every one saw how messed up i was, but the joy my boy brings me is indescribable
  • dkny155dkny155 member
    edited August 2015
    We were on the same boat debating whether or not to start trying and we finally decided to give it ago in June. EDD is 4/22/16, another April Baby :) Good luck to you in whatever you decide!
  • We are in the same boat.  Our son is 2, born in April.  Everyone is constantly asking us about when we are going to have another one.  DH and I are finally starting to talk about having another one, but still planning on waiting a little longer.  We don't want our children to be too far apart, but are not necessarily rushing things either.  
    Best of luck in whatever you decide...remember it is your choice.  No one else can dictate your family except for you and your partner!
  • We've already had #2. The way I saw it was if I let DS get out of diapers, i get my body back, etc, etc... I'd never want to go through it again. But since I was already in the thick of it I figured it'd just be easier to extended it a bit. The time has to be right for you though - for sure.
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