Long-Distance shower

jraeohyeaaa

Curious if anyone has any experience doing this?

I'm a FTM due in May and my mom and her friends (like moms to me) want to throw a shower for me. Unfortunately we live 16 hours away from my parents. We have been trying to budget for baby girl and it seems a little silly to spend extra money on a plane ticket for me--especially when we could use that money to buy things we will need for baby.

My sisters and my mom mentioned the idea of still having a shower for me but having gifts sent to me and possibly skyping me in.

I just wondered if anyone has had this type of shower and how it went?

RibbitGrl930

I'm generally not in favor of Skype showers, unless it's a very small guestlist and all people are okay with it (as in, they all offered it themselves). I'd feel a little odd as a guest receiving an invitation to send a gift to someone, and then get on the computer to watch them open it. If loved ones want to send you gifts, they will. People don't need a formally set-up event to give a gift.

VOR

I'm with ribbit on all points. MOST people are not going to want to go to a "shower" that is sitting around watching the MTB on a computer. I find the concept weird, TBH.

sschwege

I'm really not crazy about the idea.  Honestly, unless it was for someone who I was extremely close to (I can only think of two people in my life who would fall into that category) I know I wouldn't attend.

If it were me, I would decline.  I would however, still registry and if anyone should inquire you can point them in the direction of your registry.  At the very least, you will get a nice completion discount!

divinemsbee

Add me to the awkward train. Because it just doesn't seem like a good solution. Either people have to think far enough ahead to order something and get it shipped to you (and I know the majority of baby shower purchases are done a little more last minute than that), or they bring everything to your mom's house and then your mom has to deal with shipping. It's just weird. I think let your mom know where you registered and she can let people know and they can send you what they want to when they want to.

I just think drinking punch while trying to huddle around a computer screen is odd. Plus, besides the points of etiquette and the weirdness, as someone who lives far away from family, it would almost make me feel more alone, if that makes sense.

VOR

Also- REALLY think about it.  You're the guest of honor.  But you're not there.  You're in another state alone.  Part of the fun of a shower is getting a chance to see the MTB.  Doing it over a PC for a few minutes just doesn't count.  90% of the shower will involve a bunch of people mingling, eating, what have you - oh, and yeah, there is a PC over there if anyone wants to talk to you/ crowd around to watch you open gifts.

Awkward.  On all fronts. 

If your mom and sister want to do something nice for you, a MUCH better option would be to throw a "meet the baby" party the first time you have a chance to go to them. 

delujm0

Agree with PP. This sounds like a bad idea. It comes across as "I'm super happy you all wanted to buy me gifts but I'm not grateful enough to hop on a plane and see you in person to receive them."

If people want to send gifts they will. Have a get together the first time you are back in town with the baby.

jraeohyeaaa

Thanks for the input ladies! I have thought about it more and still feel awkward about the whole idea...to add to all of that, my MIL and her BFF mentioned the same idea when we were at my in-laws! Haha...I appreciate that they are trying to make it easier for us but it still seems weird.

This is the first grandbaby on both sides so I get that they are all excited and also sad we live far away (I am too). Truly I just feel cared for that they thought of trying to throw me one while I am not living near them.

HStrawberry

We live 8 and 12 hours away from our parents and it's also the first grand baby on both sides so there's a lot of excitement. We aren't having any showers before the baby arrives. On our first trip to each family, they are throwing me a shower/meet the baby party. I think it will be even more fun since all the aunts, cousins, and our friends are dying to see the baby.

Skrittens

We did a shower like this for a friend. We actually shipped decor and gifts to our fiend and catered the meal with chipotle in both locales. It was a close friend who moved away and a pretty small shower.

delujm0

My sil lives in Chicago but her family is in the Northeast. They did a very small backyard bbq/pool party/shower when she was at home for labor day weekend and the invitations asked if people could send gifts directly to Chicago but send a picture of their gift to the hostess who made a collage to give to sil at the event. It was very informal and low key.

Note that opening gifts is half the point of baby showers so this wouldn't go over well in all circles but for this very small (mostly family) party it worked. However the mom and dad to be were present to see people. I think at least mom has to be there in person for a shower to work.

MrsPDX

I am against Skype showers, as it just seems so bizarre to me. If I was invited to one I would definitely decline (and also side-eye the MTB or hostess for coming up with the idea). 

Disneygeek77

My mom wanted to do this for my SIL.  I told my mom I didn't think it was a good idea as I couldn't see my cousins / aunts / grandmothers driving an hour each way just to huddle around a TV and watch my SIL open gifts or we open them for her.  I said our money would be better spent just pooling whatever we would have spent on a silly virtual shower and getting her a glider or something.  

Luckily, my SIL was able to come out for a real shower.