So DD has a number or allergies, some worse than others. Over Thanksgiving, we made it clear what she was allergic to in hopes that there would make sure there was food there she could eat and we would be informed of anything containing something she is allergic to. Instead, they went a head and prepared a meal containing foods that she can't eat and didn't let us know. My first clue was when she broke out in hives from head to toe and began vomiting. Now how did they make such a critical mistake? Because they don't believe in food allergies. This particular side of the family belongs to a religion that doesn't believe in modern medicine or allergies in general. We are not allowing DD to eat at their home again until we make them understand the seriousness of her food allergies. Has anyone dealt with someone like this and can give some advice on how to make them understand?
If they don't believe in modern medicine due to a religious belief you will never make them understand. Don't waste your time trying to explain, and just make sure they don't feed him anything. I would bring your own sippie cup or water bottle also. Sometimes dealing with relatives it's easier to just know which battles to avoid having.
Natural cycle Dec 2010 BFP M/C 6 1/2 Weeks, D&E Jan 2011 1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011 Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks 1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
DQ ALPHA HLA MATCH, High NK Cells Diagnosed Dec 2011 IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone) IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone) Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone) Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
Nov/Dec 2012 LIT Treatment
Dec 12 Humira Jan 2013 BFP Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin Miracle Born August 2013 Premature
How did your relatives react when your DD had her allergic reaction? I would hope by seeing her reaction they would see food allergies are real and very serious...
That aside, unfortunately, you can't assume others will accommodate your DD's allergies, or understand the severity of them - no matter their background. When DD1 was diagnosed with her allergies, it became clear certain friends/family took the matter seriously and wanted to learn about her allergies. Other family members took time and repeated discussions to get on the same page.
My mom and IL's make food for our DD's, but we go over the ingredients ahead of time, and they keep packaging so I can double check the labels first. I also always bring snacks whenever we leave the house, so our girls have something I know they can eat, in the event there isn't safe food for them at whatever event we are going to.
As an allergy parent, you now have the role of educating family, friends, caregivers, and teachers about your LO's allergies and how to manage them. You'll find some people are very supportive and accommodating, while others will brush off the issue.
Being the food police sucks sometimes, but it's our job - and only ours- to make sure we ask questions about ingredients and ensure our kiddos are safe. It's something we have to remain vigilant about as long as they have allergies.
I hope your family comes around. But know that you're not alone. Unfortunately this is a common problem for allergy parents.
DD1: allergic to eggs & dairy
c/p 4/1/11
DD2: milk and soy protein intolerant, allergic to eggs, soy, peanuts, tree nuts, sesame, bananas MSPI Moms Check-In Blog
I wouldn't bother trying. Some people just won't learn. Allergies can change at any time in life though so maybe some day they will deal with it and change their tune. So sorry you had to deal with this. We were in the ER on Christmas day with a reaction, it sucks. =(
I'm assuming you knew about their religious views before. Or had SOME idea? I don't mean to point fingers, but I'm a little baffled why you put them entirely in charge of your DDs food. ANd did you ask them, before feeding her, about the ingredients? even when I go to homes where I know people will accomodate DS, I still take food and/or double check what they have for him. ANd ditto the others - its' doubtful you'll be able to change their views. Either never go to their home again OR if you do, take food for your DD.
It's easy feed your own child. Do not count on anyone to make special food for your daughter. I always make sure my daughter is fed by me or my dh only.
Re: dealing with a relative who doesn't believe in food allergies?
Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone)
Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
Jan 2013 BFP
Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
Miracle Born August 2013 Premature
Yours doesn't have to be a sad story
That aside, unfortunately, you can't assume others will accommodate your DD's allergies, or understand the severity of them - no matter their background. When DD1 was diagnosed with her allergies, it became clear certain friends/family took the matter seriously and wanted to learn about her allergies. Other family members took time and repeated discussions to get on the same page.
My mom and IL's make food for our DD's, but we go over the ingredients ahead of time, and they keep packaging so I can double check the labels first. I also always bring snacks whenever we leave the house, so our girls have something I know they can eat, in the event there isn't safe food for them at whatever event we are going to.
As an allergy parent, you now have the role of educating family, friends, caregivers, and teachers about your LO's allergies and how to manage them. You'll find some people are very supportive and accommodating, while others will brush off the issue.
Being the food police sucks sometimes, but it's our job - and only ours- to make sure we ask questions about ingredients and ensure our kiddos are safe. It's something we have to remain vigilant about as long as they have allergies.
I hope your family comes around. But know that you're not alone. Unfortunately this is a common problem for allergy parents.
DD1: allergic to eggs & dairy
c/p 4/1/11
DD2: milk and soy protein intolerant, allergic to eggs, soy, peanuts, tree nuts, sesame, bananas
MSPI Moms Check-In Blog
This. I always bring something that I know DD can eat. I don't usually let her eat food prepared by someone else unless I can check the ingredients.