June 2014 Moms

Holiday Inlaw Rant

JmeJoLee83JmeJoLee83 member
edited December 2014 in June 2014 Moms
You know you want to...share your rants here so we can commiserate with each other!

Mil called today to passive aggressively ask when she will be allowed to come over. Umm, on Christmas perhaps? It's going to be a long few days...
First time mommy-to-be
E.D.D. June 1, 2014

Re: Holiday Inlaw Rant

  • I'll check back on Christmas afternoon after we go see them... I will probably bitch about the crap they bought since she refuses to tell us what toys she got "I don't think you have any of them" well lady other people buy us stuff than just you, you haven't see what we already have, and people already bought stuff before you did.

    Holy run on sentance... /end rant

    Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10
    BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places

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  • DH bought a new gun before Christmas and FIL called yesterday and wants to go shooting either tomorrow or Christmas day. Luckily DH knew better then to even ask about Christmas day and I guess he's bringing the gifts they bought even though we asked them not to buy us anything and I swear if he brings my MIL with him and thinks he's just dropping her off at the house while they go have fun I will loose my mind. I'm still not speaking to her after the horrible miserable mess and time at the family Christmas party.
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  • Well, my MIL has been a holy living terror this year - she was pretty great before I got prego with LO.  Now, all I hear is "grandmas can do whatever they want" and "mommy is way to uptight" and "what mommy doesn't know won't hurt her".  She guilt trips DH into making us drive 4 hours on my ONE day off to have baby meet the extended family, then doesn't have anyone show up until after we leave (since I had to head back for work), then tells me once we are there that they are sick (now, DH is sick and I'm just waiting).  Now, she's staying at our place and isn't leaving until Christmas night when I specifically told DH that I wanted to just be the three of us since she RUINED our entire Thanksgiving!  I'm pissed!  I hate her right now and DH refuses to say a friggin word...I'm about to lose it on all of 'em!  Need. More. Happy. Pills. NOW!
    Egg Retrieval - Feb. 2013 -> OHSS.  FET#1 - June 2013(failed). FET#2 - October 2013(success!) Griffin Alistair: 6#10oz 20" long, born 6/19/14 @ 4:04am
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  • I found this to be an UO on the parenting board but I really dislike the "grandma can do whatever" or any version of that. I find it disrespectful that MIL never even once asked what we want or need for DD or even what other people plan on buying... and that was basically the response when H said something to her about limiting toy purchases

    Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10
    BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places

    image

  • So far the ILs have been on their best behavior.  Though they did insist on showing up when we took K to see Santa, they at least paid for the pictures, so the intrusion wasn't so horrible.  They've also agreed to do Christmas morning at our house instead of theirs which makes my life easier.

    We'll see how tomorrow goes though... it's usually really tense and awkward.  Hoping the baby will diffuse things this year.

    FX for everyone else and their Monsters-In-Law!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
    MET: 12/31/06 ENGAGED: 5/23/11 MARRIED: 11/11/11 DD DOB: 6/6/14
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  • I got to use the baby as my excuse to only spend an hour at the one side of my ILs tonight which was great because that side always gets belligerent drunk/other irresponsible behaviors and I sooo do not have the patience or energy for that this year. We got there at 6 and I was out the door by 7:15 because it was past LO's bedtime and she was getting super fussy. Tomorrow may be a different story, though. I'll be stuck at BILs all day an hour from home. BIL and his fiancée are wonderful but my FIL and sMIL are another story....

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • Mils gifts to DD weren't terrible. Mine however were awful. We also got the "don't see you often" guilt trip. Thank god today is over

    Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10
    BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places

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  • We spent half the day on Face Time because DH's family refuses to travel because everyone wants to host in their own homes. Next year, if they don't want to come out then they will miss out. Also, SIL is so jealous of DD that she barely acknowledges her existence. She refers to her as "it". She didn't respond to DH's text wishing her a merry Christmas, yet she's staying in our apartment while we are out of town. She hasn't visited us in the 8 years DH has lived here. My family isn't much better. I'm so tired of going out of our way for people who never do the same for us.
  • @Jenn111211‌ - that sounds tough.

    We all survived our first holiday season with LOs and all that fun family drama that comes along for the ride. Congrats to us!

    We had a belated Hanukkah party yesterday w/DH's extended family. It was great until MIL mentions she'd like me to look over someone's resume at the church where her school is housed and give feedback. My background has been in recruitment and everyone in his family comes to me for job advice/hr advice. It is nuts! This on top of the fact I have a 6 month old, my grandmother is dying and I am getting ready to go back to school FT in 2 weeks! Needless to say, I am not putting much effort into this and we"ll see what happens.
  • We survived the inlaws, but it was rough. FIL decided it was a good week to start construction on a bathroom... Which left us with one toilet and shower for 9 people all staying in this tiny house (if we stayed at a hotel, MIL would cry and pout and be an even bigger b**** than she already is to me. Then, we live 6 hours away, so on the day we were going to leave, DH said we would be leaving shortly after lunch so we didn't have to drive so much in the dark... 1 pm rolls around and our nephews keep whining that they are hungry, and at this point, I'm starving, too. 2 pm... I finally ask when we are going to eat lunch and MIL says "soon" ... 2:30, FIL says "why are these crockpots on low, shouldn't they be on high?" MIL says "oh I was waiting until we were ready to eat, no one seems ready yet". Holy shit! It's freaking 3:30 by the time we actually get to eat LUNCH after we had already not had breakfast... So basically we were held hostage by MIL not feeding us lunch at a normal time so we had to stay longer. We had the drive the whole way home in the dark, with it freezing misting... Glad to be home.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @sarahs11 in laws are good like that... mine knew we had somewhere to be at 4, where we would be eating again, we didn't eat until 130... I was totally starting to get hangry...

    Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10
    BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places

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  • We showed up to Christmas eve dinner (Which MIL refused to make early in the day because it was "mean" to make everyone eat at 4pm instead of 6 so we would be home for bedtime) to find out she was sick. This is the second time she didn't tell us she was sick until we drove 2 hours to her house. BIL also did this to us once. Am I supposed to do a poll before heading out to see if anyone is sick? I have a freaking baby, give me the option of exposing him.

    SIL only wanted her kids to open one gift from us, and make them wait for the rest until the next day when we would't be there. They were books and a few smaller things, literally she said if it would have all been in one box (and thus "one gift") it wouldn't have mattered.

    Overall it was much better than I expected.
    BFP: July 2013 M/C August 5, 2013
    BFP: October 22, 2013 EDD: June 21, 2014
    Baby boy arrived June 23, 2014

    BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
  • Well, kudos to us all of you who didn't lose their crap.  I was not so graceful :( MIL came over informing us she's staying an extra day, brought with her the 2 dogs (which are not allowed in our house as they are little terrors and I'd be finding hidden pee and poo for weeks), and her deaf, autistic brother who has no clue about privacy.  Anyways, after being mad about getting exposed to uncle-in-law's sickness when we were visiting them, I got a text from DH at 3am (while I was working) that he was puking something fierce.  2 hours after that, I get another text saying LO was sick, too.  Great.  This is EXACTLY what I knew was going to happen.  When I got off work at 8am, I called MIL to see when she would be coming over as I need sleep and needed her to look after DS and DH.  She tells me not to rush her, that she was going to breakfast with uncle-in-law, then had to take the dogs to the dog park.  I. Lost. My. Shit.  I sent her back to Chicago after yelling that we didn't ask her to come down and enjoy a vacation, this is our life.  We work and we needed her to be reliable.  She said that she needed to take care of the dogs and her brother first.  That wasn't the deal, SHE wanted to spend time with her grandson and I needed the help, so I agreed to let her come watch him.  She tried to guilt trip me, but I wasn't having it.  I ended up having to call in sick to work (when I felt fine) because I had to stay up all day and take care of DH and DS.  Merry freaking Christmas.  After I sent her home, DH and I got in a huge fight because I was a B.  I'm still mad.  I made it very simple for my MIL to understand that if I ask her to watch Griffin, it's because we need help that day...work to be on time for, sleep to get, etc. Not a day for her to sleep in until whenever, wander over around noon, then want to go for dinner at 5...pft.  Some people have ZERO common sense.
    Egg Retrieval - Feb. 2013 -> OHSS.  FET#1 - June 2013(failed). FET#2 - October 2013(success!) Griffin Alistair: 6#10oz 20" long, born 6/19/14 @ 4:04am
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  • @maladroit - Ugh :( Sorry the holiday was so crappy! Sounds like some wonderful stomach bugs going around everywhere. My DC provider said they had it on Christmas too. Hope everyone is feeling better!

    Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10
    BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places

    image

  • My FIL is still here!!! Please go home! He drove so he can leave any time.....
  • Generally I love my in laws. But my MiL is late for everything. I always wondered why DH was always rushing me and why we had to be at the airport 3 hrs early for a domestic flight. Well now I know. We were flying to see MILs family at 910am. DH and sFIL left at 6am with all of the luggage, DH stayed at the airport. Well MIL wasn't done getting ready at 6:40 when sFIL returned. then she still needs to pack carryon and clean the fridge. We didn't leave until 7:20 am and got to the airport at 7:45, then SFIL went to a park n fly at the end of the world. My husband just left them behind. We got to the gate with enough time to go to the bathroom. They show up at boarding, she pulls out leftover pizza and pineapple to eat, then offers to buy me a coffee. Love you but no time. DH said that he's missed 4 flights due to untimeleness, I no longer think he was exaggerating!
  • Generally I love my in laws. But my MiL is late for everything. I always wondered why DH was always rushing me and why we had to be at the airport 3 hrs early for a domestic flight. Well now I know. We were flying to see MILs family at 910am. DH and sFIL left at 6am with all of the luggage, DH stayed at the airport. Well MIL wasn't done getting ready at 6:40 when sFIL returned. then she still needs to pack carryon and clean the fridge. We didn't leave until 7:20 am and got to the airport at 7:45, then SFIL went to a park n fly at the end of the world. My husband just left them behind. We got to the gate with enough time to go to the bathroom. They show up at boarding, she pulls out leftover pizza and pineapple to eat, then offers to buy me a coffee. Love you but no time. DH said that he's missed 4 flights due to untimeleness, I no longer think he was exaggerating!
    Haha, this sounds so similar to our trip to London with DH's parents.  ugh.  We legit missed 2 flights on just the ONE trip!  I am early to everything, so I was pulling my hair out.  DH says it's normal for them and we vowed that we'd NEVER be that laizze faire about being late.
    Egg Retrieval - Feb. 2013 -> OHSS.  FET#1 - June 2013(failed). FET#2 - October 2013(success!) Griffin Alistair: 6#10oz 20" long, born 6/19/14 @ 4:04am
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