Picking names and godparents??

asglover514

LO will be here in about 2.5 months and we have no ideas for a name yet! I'm starting to freak out a little bit!! How did you and your SO decide on a name? I think we're going to keep the Alexander middle name but we don't have a first name!!

Also for those considering godparents/legal guardians for your LO how did you pick? We know we want my brother for the godfather but I'm having a small issue with my bff who just assumed she would be the godmother. Don't get me wrong I know one day she'll be a great mom to her own kids but we were raised different and have such different personalities that I don't feel like she would raise my child the way I would want. If something were to happen to us we would want someone like us to raise our kid(s). How do I break this to her gently?? She's already started hinting and telling some people!! We haven't even told my brother, though I'm sure he already knows he's picked for godfather. We're going to actually get him a shirt that says "The Godfather" when LO is born to make it semi-official Of course we'll take care of all the legal stuff later. Thanks for any advice ladies! 

BethKate2

I think that picking God parents can be a difficult decision, but keep in mind that you don't have to name the God parents as the people who would become legal guardians if something were to happen to you and your H. Even if you chose your friend as Godmother, it doesn't mean she'd be the person responsible for your child if something happened.

asglover514

BethKate2 said:

I think that picking God parents can be a difficult decision, but keep in mind that you don't have to name the God parents as the people who would become legal guardians if something were to happen to you and your H. Even if you chose your friend as Godmother, it doesn't mean she'd be the person responsible for your child if something happened.

I'm okay with that. Honestly my Godparents pretty much disowned me when I got KU the first time because we aren't married yet (though we might as well be). I'm not completely sure how all that works lol. I don't think there was any legal anything with mine or my brother's godparents, it was more religious, which we really aren't.

Mom2anAngel2

For us, the God parents are a religous designation, but not a legal one. Our will gives guardianship of our children to my sister and BIL. I know that they will raise our children in the way that we would.

As for God parents, DH and I are firm on choosing individuals who are active in our faith, as we are. We are Catholic, which actually requires one God parent to be a practicing Catholic as well. Our choice was easy for DS, we haven't chosen any for DD yet, but will soon, as her baptism will be about 6 weeks after she is born.

I would not worry about offending others. Everyone has there own reasons for making the choices they do. If your friend is hurt I think she would understand your choice if you explained it to her (hopefully).

GL with the name decision. It can be difficult! I love Alexander as the middle name though.

beemaya83

I agree with pp, godparents don't necessarily have to be your child's legal guardian.

asglover514

Thanks ladies! You really helped me understand this godparent thing a little better because I was blanking. Hopefully we have a name soon!!

asglover514

shandorfml2

I agree that Godparents are more symbolic. I rarely see or hear from mine. I am going with the same God Mother we had picked for our angel DD. She is a wonderful, spiritual person who will make a good God Mother. However I would chose someone else to raise him most likely if we died.

As for the name, we've had ours picked out for years...we both just liked it, and if our DD had been a boy, that would have been her name. We decided to go with my Mom's maiden name for his middle to connect them.

ikrystal

BethKate2 said:

I think that picking God parents can be a difficult decision, but keep in mind that you don't have to name the God parents as the people who would become legal guardians if something were to happen to you and your H. Even if you chose your friend as Godmother, it doesn't mean she'd be the person responsible for your child if something happened.

Yep, this.  When you think abou it, you might not actually want to split parenting responsibilities between two people (your friend and your brother) who are not in a relationship together.  Also, most children have different godparents, but will have the same guardians so that they can all stay together in the event something happens to the parents. 

lyndz333

My sister is the godmother and would be the legal guardian of our LO if something were to happen to us, but my sister and I are extremely close and I couldn't imagine anyone better for the job. The godfather is my husband's cousin and he would not be legal guardian. As other have mt ironed, those can be two entirely separate roles. Good luck!

lcwed

I think misunderstanding the role of godparents can be difficult for people outside a particular faith to understand.  We are baptist, but my best friend is Lutheran.  I am the Godmother to one of her boys.  I knew it meant I would make sure that my godson was raised knowing God.  My mother freaked out when I told her because she thought it meant my single 27 year old self would be his guardian if something happened.  I had to explain the actual role of a Godparent to her.

We actually had our boy name picked out before I was ever pregnant.  DH said he had to have a name that sounded good on a sports card.  Of course our first was a girl.  We had the first name picked out so we just tried to find a middle name that went with it.  We actually picked out a second girls name a few days after DD was born, so this time around we are covered with names.

asglover514

Thanks everyone. I made a name list last night and we've narrowed it down to 2 I think! Thanks for all the input on Godparents. I know my family had them for mostly religious reasons but I'm not particularly religious now so...yeah. Lol. I think I'm going to explain to my bff that I want her to be a big part of his life but would rather my brother be the one to take care of him if anything happened because he's really the only person we know will raise him the way we would.