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DDF

pettycrockerpettycrocker member
in Secondary IF
I am sure everyone is busy with last min. holiday crap. Vent your frustrations here. 





PS I will be posting KUFMO tomorrow, so make sure you add an updates to this weeks 2IF check in (posted on 12/15) for tomorrows Bi Weekly KUFMO! 


Spontaneous pregnancy #1
DD1 July 31, 2011

Trying for #2 since Oct 11
732973 Clomid Cycles
2 IUIs 
3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



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Re: DDF

  • MoFreeMoFree member
    DDF,

    Why am I obliged to give the knee jerk 'I'm happy for them' reaction when someone announces their pregnancy. Truthfully I'm not sincerely happy for them but hurt by another reminder of being on the outside looking in.
    TTC since 3-08 IVF # 1 Dec 2011 BFP DD born at 31 weeks 6-24-12

    FET #1 Dec 2013 BFN

    FET # 2 Feb 2014 BFN

    No more frosties

    IVF #2. September 2014

    PGD yielded 2 perfect 5d blasts

    SET November 9, 2014
    Nov 23, 2014. Another BFN

    Not sure where to go from here.

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  • Davie813Davie813 member
    MoFree said:
    DDF, Why am I obliged to give the knee jerk 'I'm happy for them' reaction when someone announces their pregnancy. Truthfully I'm not sincerely happy for them but hurt by another reminder of being on the outside looking in.
    I'm so right there with you.  I know logically that it isn't a zero-sum game, and that they're not somehow getting pregnant instead of me, when it's my turn, but in most cases it's reallllly hard to be anything other than jealous and sad.  And ready to go drink all the wine.
    *****Signature/Ticker Warning******

    Me: 41, DH: 45
    DD, 6/15/2013
    TTC #2 beginning January 2014
    AMH 1.05; FSH range 7-11

    July 2014: IUI #1.  Follistim + Pregnyl.  2 follicles--BFN
    September 2014: IUI #2.  Follistim + Pregnyl + Ganirelix + Crinone.  4(?) follicles--BFN
    October 2014: IUI #3.  More Follistim + More Ganirelix + Pregnyl + Crinone.  4 follicles--BFP!  Beta #1=10 Beta #2=33 Beta #3=97 Beta #4=158.  M/C 11/1/14
    December 2014: IVF #1.  Microdose Lupron protocol.  9R, 9M, 9F.  3 5-day blasts transferred 12/15. BFFN.
    April 2015: IVF #2.  Microdose Lupron protocol.  16R, 15M, 12F. Transferred 2 5-day blasts 4/12 and froze 4--BFP!  M/C 5/25/15
    August 2015: IVF #3.  14R, 13M, 11F.  Froze 5 blasts for CCS testing.  3 normals.  FET planned for 10/2015.



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  • pdxvegpdxveg member
    MoFree said:
    DDF, Why am I obliged to give the knee jerk 'I'm happy for them' reaction when someone announces their pregnancy. Truthfully I'm not sincerely happy for them but hurt by another reminder of being on the outside looking in.
    I know what you mean, and I hate that I feel that way.  I want to be happy for people, but I know that will never happen unless I manage to get pregnant again.  I dread having my friends tell me they are TTC again.  
    Me: 34 DH: 36 
    DD#1 04/28/11

    TTC#2 since April 2012 - Unexplained Secondary IF (probably PCOS)
    Dec 13-March 14 Femara and TI - BFN
    April 2014 IUI#1 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    June 2014 IUI#2 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFP 7/9/14 - No HB on 8/13/14 @ 8w4d
    Nov 2014 IUI#3 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFFN
    Jan 2015 IUI#4 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    Feb 2015 IUI#5 Converted to TI (7.5mg Femara) - BFP 3/17/15!!!
    Beta #1 82, Beta #2 202 Please let this be it.
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  • pdxvegpdxveg member
    DD, I am so pissed that my husband doesn't experience the infertility roller coaster of emotions.  He just doesn't get it and he is the one person who I really need to understand the way I am feeling.
    Me: 34 DH: 36 
    DD#1 04/28/11

    TTC#2 since April 2012 - Unexplained Secondary IF (probably PCOS)
    Dec 13-March 14 Femara and TI - BFN
    April 2014 IUI#1 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    June 2014 IUI#2 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFP 7/9/14 - No HB on 8/13/14 @ 8w4d
    Nov 2014 IUI#3 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFFN
    Jan 2015 IUI#4 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    Feb 2015 IUI#5 Converted to TI (7.5mg Femara) - BFP 3/17/15!!!
    Beta #1 82, Beta #2 202 Please let this be it.
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  • Jodee37Jodee37 member
    DDF,

    What is with this GD traffic!?! I just want to get to Las Vegas already!!!!!!!

    Need. MOAR. Booze.
    Me: 36, DH: 36
    DH's SA = normal
    1 tube only wonder
    AFC 3-5, AMH 0.30

    BFP #1 3/29/11.  EDD 12/4/11... Missed m/c 5/9/11. Cytotec fail. D&C 5/17/11.
    BFP #2   7/5/11.  EDD 3/14/12... Our rainbow Kellen born 3/14/12 via c/s.
    BFP #3 5/30/13.  EDD 2/8/14...  6wk u/s HB 126. 8wk u/s lost HB. D&C 7/12/13.
    BFP #4 2/18/14.  EDD 10/30/14... Ruptured ectopic with L tube removed & D&C 3/7/14.
    BFP #5 7/27/14.  EDD 4/9/15...  m/c @ 5w4d.

    IVF #1    Oct 2014 - antagonist protocol: 9R, 7M, 5F. 3dt of 3 Grade 2 embies. BFN. 
    IVF #2    Jan 2015 cancelled due to dominant follicle.  Converted to IUI #1. BFFN
    IVF #2.1 March 2015 cancelled due to dominant follicle.

    BFP #6  (SUPRISE!) 3/19/15.  EDD 11/30/15...  CP at 4w2d.
    IUI #2:    Clomid + Follistim = 3 follies. BFN.
    IVF #2.2 May 2015 - horrible response to micro lupron flare protocol: 3R, 3M, 3F. 3dt of 2 Grade 3 embies. BFFN. 

    BFP #7 (beyond surprised again!) 4/26/16. EDD 1/5/17. beautiful betas!!!! and then near-fatal hemorrhagic corpus luteum. turns out baby was ectopic after all; another lap 5/6 (@24dpo).

    the universe can fuck off.


     "You are overly paranoid and delusional that every one is out to get you." -lastsliverofhope

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    all AL welcome. TTC #2 for 43 44 months.
    follow my infertility journey here at timestandsstillblog.com

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  • jen4nyjen4ny member
    DDF, 

    Thanks to having pneumonia this week my planned trying to conceive session has been cancelled. So much for that miracle Christmas baby I was going to conceive. Now I lose this month and next month for my hysteroscopy. I hate wasting time. And now DH has his man cold and is driving me insane. 
    "From the moment I first saw you, the second that you were born, I knew that you were the love of my life" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Me: 35, DH: 40
    TTC # 2 since 8/13, Dx: unexplained secondary infertility
    Clomid cycles 7/14 & 8/14= BFN
    IUI # 1 (clomid) 8/27/14= BFN
    IUI # 2 (clomid and follistim) 9/25/14= BFN
    IUI # 3 (femara and follistim) 10/23/14= BFN
    IUI # 4 (femara and follistim) 11/20/14= BFN
    12/12/14- saline sono shows two polyps
    2/15- two uterine polyps and "schmutz" (RE's words) removed
    8/15- surprise BFP! Beta #1 70 Beta #2 150 
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  • annibesannibes member
    DD, why is it that I make it through November and December mostly healthy, and then as soon as I get home from work for 2 weeks worth of break (one of the only perks of working in a year-round position in a school) I immediately feel like I'm going to vomit? And I was lucky I woke up when I did this morning or I would have explosively pooped the bed. Give me a cold any day. This gastro-intestinal junk is annoying.

    I am counting the number of days I am sick over break and taking that many sick days when we go back to work in January. Eff this.
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  • fuzzbumblefuzzbumble member
    annibes said:
    DD, why is it that I make it through November and December mostly healthy, and then as soon as I get home from work for 2 weeks worth of break (one of the only perks of working in a year-round position in a school) I immediately feel like I'm going to vomit? And I was lucky I woke up when I did this morning or I would have explosively pooped the bed. Give me a cold any day. This gastro-intestinal junk is annoying. I am counting the number of days I am sick over break and taking that many sick days when we go back to work in January. Eff this.

    Feel better! :(

    image

    June 19, 2010 - Miracle Baby Girl

    Round 2
    Since March 2013
    BFP April 2013 - Missed M/C July 2013 @ 12w6d
    BFP December 2013 - CP @ 4w3d
    Eight medicated cycles, three IUIs: FAIL
    IVF #1 Antagonist - January 2015: CP/FAIL

    IVF #2 April 2015: Microdose lupron Flare
    ICSI, CCS Freeze all
    6 blasts biopsied/5 normal

    FET #1 June 25, 2015 6AA and 5AA blast transfer
    BFP 3dp5dt!
    Beta 8dp5dt 195.2, 10dp5dt 474.8, 12dp5dt 977, 22dp5dt 25,580
    <3 Twins! Our boy and girl coming end of February!  <3

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  • pettycrockerpettycrocker member
    DDS, 

    I am so sick and tired of feeling depressed and blah. I know a lot of this is because the holidays always irritated me, but feeling like we're now "stuck" in our TTC is really making feel like shit. I've had to take months off between IVFs before, but I knew we had a plan in the future.. I'm having a hard time being in this stand still now. Andplusalso everyone is pregnant, and anyone who isn't pregnant is remarking to me about how EVERYONE IS PREGNANT, so I feel like I'm getting hit coming and going lately. Yes, GDit I know everyone on the whole GD planet is more fertile than me, Mother Nature, that is fucking ENOUGH with the non stop reminders. I just want to crawl into a hole. I want to use this time bonding with my little girl, but it's hard to do that when I feel depressed all the time. I just have no energy for anything, and want to lay on the couch eating junk food all day long- I know a lot of this is PMS related also, so I am hoping and praying I just get my fucking period and feel reasonably human again. It's making feel even worse because I feel like I should snap the fuck out of this for my kid so she can enjoy these few days leading up to Xmas, but it's easier said than done, and I just keep making myself feel guilty for feeling shitty, etc, etc, hamster wheel of life. 

    BYE WINTER. 


    Spontaneous pregnancy #1
    DD1 July 31, 2011

    Trying for #2 since Oct 11
    732973 Clomid Cycles
    2 IUIs 
    3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
    Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
    Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
    Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
    Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



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  • pdxvegpdxveg member
    @potatocastillo ((hugs))

    Me: 34 DH: 36 
    DD#1 04/28/11

    TTC#2 since April 2012 - Unexplained Secondary IF (probably PCOS)
    Dec 13-March 14 Femara and TI - BFN
    April 2014 IUI#1 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    June 2014 IUI#2 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFP 7/9/14 - No HB on 8/13/14 @ 8w4d
    Nov 2014 IUI#3 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFFN
    Jan 2015 IUI#4 (Femara + Ovidrel) - BFN
    Feb 2015 IUI#5 Converted to TI (7.5mg Femara) - BFP 3/17/15!!!
    Beta #1 82, Beta #2 202 Please let this be it.
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  • ellebelle2384ellebelle2384 member
    Big huge ((hugs)) @potatocastillo‌. Don't beat yourself up for feeling the way you do. It's completely understandable. And I'm sure your DD will love the holidays regardless how much you do before Xmas. (Hugs)
    Me: 31     DH: 33
    Dx: Me: Recurrent Pregnancy Loss; DH: Low Morphology (2%)
    BFP#1: MC 3/1/11 at 6w1d - EDD 10/21/11
    BFP#2: 5/3/11 - EDD 1/9/12 - DD Born 1/6/12
    image
    TTC #2 since 12/13
    BFP#3: MC 2/8/14 at 4w5d - EDD 10/13/14
    BFP#4: MC 5/6/14 at 4w4d - EDD 1/9/15
    BFP#5: MMC discovered 8/4/14 at 9w1d - D&C 8/5/14 - Baby Boy with Trisomy 16 (maternal origin) - EDD 3/8/15
    BFP#6: CP 11/6/14 at 4w2d - EDD 7/14/15
    IVF #1 with ICSI & PGS: May/June 2015, ER 6/3/15, 17R/17M/15F
    IVF #2 with ICSI & PGS: July 2015, ER 7/16/15, 16R/11M/9F
    PGS results = 6 normal embryos (4 boys, 2 girls)
    FET 9/23/15 = BFFN
    Natural FET 11/4/15 = BFP!
    Beta 9dp5dt = 92

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  • FrenchteachermamaFrenchteachermama member
    @potatocastillo I am also stuck on the hamster wheel.  I am trying my hardest to snap out of it but I'm really struggling.  I'm hoping 2015 will be more kind to me and I can be more kind to myself.



    imageimageimage
    image
    My FF Chart:
    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/490dd7
    TTC #3 since June 2013
    BFP #1 7/21/2013--EDD 3/30/14--D&C 9/24/13
    BFP #2 1/28/14--MC 2/7/14
    IUI #1 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #2 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #3 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IVF #1, Stimmed for 12 days, ER 8/22/14, 9 retrieved, 7M, 7F!!  Freeze all due to fluid in uterus.
    FET end of October 2014 cancelled due to fluid in uterus due to possible c-scar defect
    Surgery scheduled 12/12/14 to fix possible isthmocele
    3/26/15 transferred one 8 cell grade 4 embryo and one 6 cell grade 3 embryo = slow rising betas for 2+ weeks = ectopic MTX shot 4/29/15
    Repeat c-scar surgery June 2015
    2nd and last IVF cycle August 2015, stimmed for 12 days, 2 egg retrieved, both mature and both fertilized.  Transferred both 8-cell embryos on Day 3, beta 9/5/15 = BFFN
    MOVING TO ADOPTION!  


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  • wreckitsmommywreckitsmommy member
    Ugh...
    MoFree said:

    DDF,

    Why am I obliged to give the knee jerk 'I'm happy for them' reaction when someone announces their pregnancy. Truthfully I'm not sincerely happy for them but hurt by another reminder of being on the outside looking in.

    Report Reply
  • pettycrockerpettycrocker member
    @bguti004 Who are you?! An introduction would be nice. 


    image


    Spontaneous pregnancy #1
    DD1 July 31, 2011

    Trying for #2 since Oct 11
    732973 Clomid Cycles
    2 IUIs 
    3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
    Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
    Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
    Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
    Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



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