Unique Names! Help!

Trampslikeus

@catmagick


Drop the mic.  Swoosh your hair.  Walk off the stage.   BAM.


:P

leenziepops

I just logged back in after doing some actual work while at work. This is the first time the race card has been pulled out. Wow. Let's not go there OP.

lacems

I think we're all suppose to be adults here. Bashing on people is really not needed. We are all going to be mother's, so let's act like it instead of a bunch of teenagers. I don't think she was trying to be mean. Either way, a unique name or a overly used common name... It's still going to be special because it's the best gift of life ❤

blu-eyedwife

rade said:

Nothing against white people. My father is white as is my husband.

I don't see the difference between this and a white person saying "Dude I'm not racist.  I've got a black friend."

Doesn't excuse the racism.

lkr004

rade said:

White people.. So close minded. Should I just name her Ashley, Rachel Is that what you're looking for or Nicole? I see tons of people naming their kids after family members or what's trending. Choosing to be different doesn't mean it's not respectable. Charlie for a girl? Everyone seems to love that one or Lincoln for a girl that's the name of a city those are "different" too. To each his own i guess. Like I said my name is Radiance. I don't intent to name my kid that but always get, wow that's cool.

Lincoln is ONLY the name of a city. Or a couple cities. Or 42 of them. Or a vehicle make. Or, y'know, a former president. Geez.

leenziepops

tashany99 said:

....

I myself will not be asking for advice on this topic. I am Indian and I just feel Indian names are understood by people that understand the culture, and I think that is the same in any culture. I mean let's be real. Even some Indians make fun of Indian names. Lol

Now you should definitely share the funny ones! I went to uni with an Indian guy named Katshit. Poor guy. I'm sorry but I still giggle over his name to this day.

kimmarie1105

Frogger5 said:

Trampslikeus said:

Hahaha.   Very common to have VERY religious names...  Blessing is quite popular, Immaculate is another one I've heard a few times, Soooooo many Mary and Josephs.  But they don't do Jesus, I guess the Latinos have cornered the market on Jesus.


Not popular in the US, but at least they are actual words. 

It is a real word, that is true, but so are Cinnamon and Diamond, that's all I'm saying. There's something going on with people deciding which words are OK to use and which aren't and then telling other people that their new word-names don't cut it.

Also, there's obviously a huge difference between Congolese people living in the Congo and African Americans living in the US. It doesn't really make any sense to say that black people in Africa don't name their kids the same way that black people in the US do. Tell me you wouldn't side-eye the parents that name their little white American girl Blessing. OK, maybe you wouldn't because you've heard it a lot, but maybe . . . I don't know, Miracle? Hallelujah? Hymn?

I just think it's pretty ridiculous to pretend that there's not a racial/cultural slant to the whole topic of "legitimate" names, or to pretend that the OP's comment about white people not being tolerant of made up names that black people sometimes use isn't accurate. You can get mad at someone for playing the "race card" if you want, but I don't see why admitting it in the open makes people so uncomfortable. Totally not directing this mini-rant just at you, @Trampslikeus, but I guess I feel pretty strongly about it!

~~~~~~~~~why quote box no work~~~~~~~~


You have some valid points that I agree with. I'm going to address this though since you seemed to have paraphrased what I said to OP.

First, if OP had come in here with "black people...so small minded" I would have jumped all over her shit just the same. In 2014, that shit is unacceptable to me. Although I'm well aware that it goes on in every race, culture, ethnicity.

In my opinion, it's not a black/white thing. White people name their kids stupid shit all the time. See Korbin, Brytini, Krystal, Heathyr, and the ever so lovely backwards names like Naveah, Nalon, and Trebor.

People seem to get confused between unique and fictitious. If you want to name your child something unique and honor your ethnicity or culture she could look at African names such as Aziza, Kalifa, or Mandisa.

Naming your child should not be taken lightly. There are many instances throughout their lives where their name will proceed them as a person. A resume might not get the attention it deserves when it says Cinnamon, or Brytini across the top.

That's just real life.

sgarmand

PenguinMG said:

SNIP

I went to high school (in south east Texas) with a girl named Miracle. Her sister's name was Angel. Her parents are French-Cajun from Louisiana. /anecdote

You went to high school in southeast Texas?! I'm from/live in southeast Texas! 

finchfeeder80

And that, @jimbobcooter, is why you're our mod. Well said!

lacems

sensitivesally said:

lacems said:

I think we're all suppose to be adults here. Bashing on people is really not needed. We are all going to be mother's, so let's act like it instead of a bunch of teenagers. I don't think she was trying to be mean. Either way, a unique name or a overly used common name... It's still going to be special because it's the best gift of life ❤

OP was never bashed, not once. Read again.

Should we start a discussion on that to? Either way...jumping down her throat. Still uncalled for. Pointless discussion.

effthisnoise

JimBobCooter said:

I have no issue with names that are non traditional.  And actual ethnic names are off limits for flaming, IMO.    I'm even ok with names like Miracle or Precious, even though I may, admittedly, raise an eyebrow, because at least they are actual words that exist and do have lovely meaning and sentiment.   But there is a line that gets crossed when parents just start making up names for the sake of making being creative, just because they can, name children words that have negative meaning, or  that are spelled in a way no one should be expected to pronounce.

Names effect you your entire life.  This is just  a cold hard fact.    Working in child welfare I see more than the average bear's share of children (and adults, frankly) with made up or yooneek names,  children of ALL races.   Of the tweens/teens I've worked with who have names like that, most of them will openly say they wish they had a normal one because of the impact it has had on them, and when  the kids with those names, who are old enough to have a say, end up being adopted by new families they almost always opt for a name change in the process.

Frankly, I want to give my child the best chance possible in this world, coming right out of the gate.  This doesn't mean being stuck only with only traditional names like Mary, Ashley, David, or Michael.  But it does absolutely exclude anything that is going to invite judgment, because the world WILL judge, no matter how much we wish everyone would just join hands and sing Kumbaya.

All of this!! My former boss and I had a conversation about names last week and he mentioned the book Freakanomics (I haven't read it) has a section about how people's names play a large role in how much they achieve in life. Even though discrimination isn't okay, it still happens. Look at everything going on in our country right now for proof of that! If you give your child a made-up and/or misspelled name that's hard to pronounce, don't be surprised if his college application gets passed over for a Michael or his resume gets passed over for a Michelle. You will make your child's life harder from the very start. And don't get me started on how much harder it will be to teach your child how to read and learn the rules of spelling when his name doesn't even follow those rules. "'I' before 'e' except after 'c'...unless you think it's cooler to spell it how you like. Then that's fine. Fuck the rules!"

TheAlmostMom

I work in International HR and the names that are unique to certain geographies are sometimes even more important in the way they are spelled/presented because of differing cultures opinions on the weight of a name and how that carries over into employee respect.  

I thought this was an interesting article on countries that have very specific laws on baby naming: 

https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/05/03/12-countries-where-the-government-regulates-what-you-can-name-your-child/

jamieswifeyforlifey

@kimmarie1105‌ for you to say names are "stupid" because of spelling is a little rude. My name is Krystel, my mom chose to spell it that way because of our French heritage. It may be different, but I love it because it's a reflection of who I am and my french background. Just because you can't always understand the personal reasoning of how some names are chosen, doesn't make it stupid. So, maybe practice a little discretion before bashing people's names on the internet. Thanks, mama.
But, with all that being said, I think it is completely stupid to ask strangers for baby names/spelling of names. Sorry, OP, but who gives a shit what we think about the names you want to give your LO. Ask your DH, family or friends. They know you better than us. You're naming your child, put some personal touch into it.
Rant over. Time for this cranky pregnant lady to go for a nap.

kimmarie1105

jamieswifeyforlifey said:

@kimmarie1105‌ for you to say names are "stupid" because of spelling is a little rude. My name is Krystel, my mom chose to spell it that way because of our French heritage. It may be different, but I love it because it's a reflection of who I am and my french background. Just because you can't always understand the personal reasoning of how some names are chosen, doesn't make it stupid. So, maybe practice a little discretion before bashing people's names on the internet. Thanks, mama.
But, with all that being said, I think it is completely stupid to ask strangers for baby names/spelling of names. Sorry, OP, but who gives a shit what we think about the names you want to give your LO. Ask your DH, family or friends. They know you better than us. You're naming your child, put some personal touch into it.
Rant over. Time for this cranky pregnant lady to go for a nap.

I do apologize that what I said offended you, although I stand by my opinion. I was trying to make a point.
Perhaps you telling OP that her decision to ask the Internet for name help was stupid offended her, or even the countless number of ladies who spend time at the baby name board. Just food for thought.
If I had to practice discretion for my opinions on the Internet to avoid insulting someone I wouldn't be able to say anything.

jamieswifeyforlifey

@kimmarie1105, haha fair enough, it's all good! It's hard not to step on people's toes around here, especially with all the pregnancy hormones raging. Just figured I'd share my thought as well (I always thought I had a very nice name :P)

I also stand by my opinion that asking complete strangers to name your child is a little far fetched, kind of asking for some negative feedback. I just always thought it should be a personal choice, to each their own though.

lacems

sensitivesally said:

lacems said:

sensitivesally said:

lacems said:

I think we're all suppose to be adults here. Bashing on people is really not needed. We are all going to be mother's, so let's act like it instead of a bunch of teenagers. I don't think she was trying to be mean. Either way, a unique name or a overly used common name... It's still going to be special because it's the best gift of life ❤

OP was never bashed, not once. Read again.

Should we start a discussion on that to? Either way...jumping down her throat. Still uncalled for. Pointless discussion.

No one jumped down her throat either. It's been a very thoughtful and informative thread. You can stop your pointless white knighting now.

Hahah pathetic

willowprincess

lacems said:

I think we're all suppose to be adults here. Bashing on people is really not needed. We are all going to be mother's, so let's act like it instead of a bunch of teenagers. I don't think she was trying to be mean. Either way, a unique name or a overly used common name... It's still going to be special because it's the best gift of life ❤

OP was never bashed, not once. Read again.

Should we start a discussion on that to? Either way...jumping down her throat. Still uncalled for. Pointless discussion.

No one jumped down her throat either. It's been a very thoughtful and informative thread. You can stop your pointless white knighting now.

Hahah pathetic

Yes. Your WKing was very pathetic.

musictchr25

lacems said:

I think we're all suppose to be adults here. Bashing on people is really not needed. We are all going to be mother's, so let's act like it instead of a bunch of teenagers. I don't think she was trying to be mean. Either way, a unique name or a overly used common name... It's still going to be special because it's the best gift of life ❤

OP was never bashed, not once. Read again.

Should we start a discussion on that to? Either way...jumping down her throat. Still uncalled for. Pointless discussion.

No one jumped down her throat either. It's been a very thoughtful and informative thread. You can stop your pointless white knighting now.

Hahah pathetic

Why did you feel the need to respond to this post after 5 days of it being dead? I know you have the right to respond to whatever you want, whenever you want, but you're just opening a can of worms here. 

KonaCoffeeBean

JimBobCooter said:

I have no issue with names that are non traditional.  And actual ethnic names are off limits for flaming, IMO.    I'm even ok with names like Miracle or Precious, even though I may, admittedly, raise an eyebrow, because at least they are actual words that exist and do have lovely meaning and sentiment.   But there is a line that gets crossed when parents just start making up names for the sake of making being creative, just because they can, name children words that have negative meaning, or  that are spelled in a way no one should be expected to pronounce.

Names effect you your entire life.  This is just  a cold hard fact.    Working in child welfare I see more than the average bear's share of children (and adults, frankly) with made up or yooneek names,  children of ALL races.   Of the tweens/teens I've worked with who have names like that, most of them will openly say they wish they had a normal one because of the impact it has had on them, and when  the kids with those names, who are old enough to have a say, end up being adopted by new families they almost always opt for a name change in the process.

Frankly, I want to give my child the best chance possible in this world, coming right out of the gate.  This doesn't mean being stuck only with only traditional names like Mary, Ashley, David, or Michael.  But it does absolutely exclude anything that is going to invite judgment, because the world WILL judge, no matter how much we wish everyone would just join hands and sing Kumbaya.

I'm also a child welfare attorney. And I've seen a lot of names that I used to consider awful until Genocide came along. Now every other name in the world sounds beautiful to me.

ghostof5letters

Your son could be an aerospace engineer, but if someone gets introduced to a guy named Jim Bob they're automatically going to think he's a moron or a hick. 

Names have power. 

ETA:

Hahahaha - I just saw your Mod's name is Jim Bob. Sorry about that  

KonaCoffeeBean

I'm a GAL.