While not exactly a pregnancy problem, this question is triggered by the new baby.
How often do you personally talk to your in laws (mother, father, siblings)?
My MIL calls me daily and also speaks with my husband directly every day (sometimes multiple times).
I've never been a phone person and don't even talk to my own family that much. Am I wrong to assume that in laws don't need to keep up with both me and my husband this often?
Perhaps part of the issue is I'm TIRED of talking baby baby baby all day, everyday.
Re: Communicating with In-Laws - Who and How Often?
We are long distance, so we skype instead of call the majority of the time. We skype once or twice a month. When we first got married and moved, the ILs wanted to skype once a week, but we weaned them off of that to where we are now. Phone calls are only in case of birthdays or scheduling travel for the most part.
I'd go nuts talking to her every day. I don't skype with my family much more often, but I call them more. I talk to my mom at least once a week, but more since getting pregnant.
You could try telling her you're not up for talking today, need rest, or say you're busy and offer to talk tomorrow or two days after to take some control of the situation.
Married: July 28, 2012
DD: July 29, 2013
DS: July 1, 2015
Current EDD: May 15, 2017
TTGP July Siggy Challenge: Summer Fails
Me- 28, DH- 32 ----> together six years, married June 2012
Initial diagnosis of PCOS, currently labeled as unexplained infertility
BFP 12/20/13, EDD 8/25/2014, baby got his wings at 11 weeks and 3 days.
BFP 11/9/14, EDD 7/24/2015
However, for DH with my family, he gets it very different. My parents still live ~7 hrs away, but in my territory for work so I see them once a month usually. We also keep up with my aunt and uncles family quite a bit. He probably sees someone from his in laws about every 3 mos or so - and the closest relatives are 3 hrs away! I talk regularly with my parents and uncle, only my uncle calls DH, but not often. My little sister snapchats DH multiple times a day...it's adorable
That said, I couldn't talk to anyone in depth everyday like that. My mom and I text a little at least every other day, and that's enough.
I make a point to not be around much when they talk. They live far away anyway. Now with Dd here, they want to FaceTime every week. We call maybe every 2 weeks. It's strained and fake.
ETA: Except I see my MIL more often than every few months since we only live 20 minutes away from her.
On the other hand, my mom calls AT LEAST once a day, 3 times is typical. I get so sick of it. I also see her once a week. My mom is alone and clearly very lonely.
My MIL and I literally have nothing in common so we don't talk much unless we're visiting - a few texts here and there or I'll talk when she's on speaker in the car. She talks to DH probably 2-3 times a week, usually while he's commuting. I think it's about to he same with my FIL. I'm sure once the baby is here there will be more face timing and texting, but I like how it is for now. There's no way I'd be picking up the phone to chat with her everyday.
loveandlignin, my family by marriage is from Indo, too! Just a rare coincidence I don't see too often.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014
BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
I talk to MIL on the phone maybe 1-2x/month, and it's usually because she can't get a hold of H. Sometimes I know she's only calling because he didn't answer and I don't answer. Also sometimes i just don't feel like talking to her so I don't answer. H does the same thing with her, but he talks to her probably 1-2x/week. He talks to FIL a couple times a year maybe.
My parents I talk to daily, and my mom usually multiple times a day. We also FaceTime a couple times a week so they can see DS. We live 12 hours away from both of our families so we only see them a few times a year. My parents we see more because they come down here to visit as well, where MIL it's only when we go there. I've only met FIL once in 6 years and it was at our wedding.
My MIL will call about once a week and talk to dh or I, I will be honest I just avoid the calls til she reaches DH if he is working or something. I hate talking on the phone since its all I do at work all day!!
BFP: 04/03/2014 EDD: 12/15/2014 HB: 04/30/14 (75bpm) MC: 5/2/2014 (natural)
DS-9/2012
DD-7/2015
I had to put up boundaries, I took backlash from H for doing so, but it's what I needed to do for my sanity. His sister also has issues & is volitle (she has wished me dead a few times, and for that reason she will not be a part of baby's life.) Moral of the story, if things are happening with his family (or yours) that you are not ok with, you need to set boundaries that YOU are comfortable with.