AW: Coming home — The Bump
TTC After a Loss

AW: Coming home

Hi ladies,
 I thought I needed a post after being gone for a month to explain why I've been avoiding TB and apologize for just disappearing with no explanation for anyone.
After my MC in October, something in me broke. When I had my MC in April, I found this board and it was my safe haven. This time though, it happened during a week that a lot of people seemed to be moving to PGAL, and although I was so happy for them, I needed to protect myself and turn off the internet and anything PG or MC-related and take some time to grieve alone. When that didn't work, I started seeing a therapist, and that seemed to help some. I've been starting to feel strong enough to offer others support again and feel like I'm ready to 'come home'.
I'm approaching my April MC EDD next week on my birthday (Tuesday), and although I feel like I'm stronger, I'm not completely back to myself yet.

Just wanted to let you all know that even though I haven't been posting much, I've been stalking all of you and miss you!
 
Married 07/2006, TTC since 2010
08/2011: Clomid 50mg, IUI --> BFN  ,
10/2011: Clomid 100mg, IUI --> BFN

04/13: Clomid, IUI BFP --> MC at 6w1d
05/13: Femara 2.5mg, IUI --> BFN  , 08/13: Femara 2.5mg --> BFN
03/14: Femara 5mg, IUI --> 1 follicle @ 27d --> BFP! EDD 12/02/14--> blighted ovum, missed MC 6w6d --> D&C
4/23: D&C...starting over again, with a little part of my heart broken off
5/31: Femara 7.5mg --> cancelled cycle, no follies
7/14: Femara 5mg + brevelle + menopur + IUI --> converted to IVF, ER 7/28 --> ET cancelled due to severe OHSS.
9/20/14:  Frozen Embryo Transfer --> BFP--> EDD 6/6/15 --> MC at 5w3d 
 
10/16/14: Frozen Embryo Transfer --> BFN
2/6/15: Frozen Embryo Transfer --> BFP --> MC at 5w4d
3/20/16: PGS-tested Frozen Embryo Transfer --> BFP, Living Child born 12/1/15
6/6/17: Fresh IVF Cycle --> Severe OHSS, 5 PGS-tested embryos frozen
2/23/18: PGS-tested FET --> BFN
3/30/18: Cancelled cycle due to lining 4.2mm
6/21/18: PGS-tested FET --> BFN
jms627

Re: AW: Coming home

  • I'm sorry you've been having a rough time. I'm thinking of you and sending you lots of hugs.  We are here when you need us.  It is definitely good to "see" you though.  

    Me 35 / DH 36
    TTC since 09/2009
    Hashimoto's diagnosis 11/2011 / Endometriosis removal surgery 04/2013
    Other diagnosis: 1 mutation - PAI-1 gene
    BFP#1 9/27/2013  /  EDD 6/4/14  /  MC 10/17/2013
    BFP#2 3/4/14  /  EDD 11/13/14  /  CP
    BFP#3 6/7/14  / EDD 2/16/15  /  CP
    BFP #4 11/7/2014 / EDD 7/17/15  /  CP
    Current  Plan: Waiting to change RE... Appt on 1/16
    RXs: Metformin, Levothyroxin, Baby Aspirin, CoQ10, Vitamin D, Folic Acid, Pre-natal. Progesterone post O.

    imageimage
    ***Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

    All Welcome


    MSU_Girl1202
  • I'm so sorry you're having a rough time (((((hugs))))

    MSU_Girl1202
  • *big hugs* lady
    Married November 19, 2010
    BFP April 18, 2014, EDD December 19
    MMC diagnosed May 15, 2014, completed May 24
    TTA for the foreseeable future
    image

    TTCAL December Siggy Challenge - Auto Correct Fails

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    MSU_Girl1202
  • Big ((hugs))
    ----
    *I am no longer regularly posting on TB because of the fucked up debacle of Jan 2015 when administrators banned long-term members and mods with no notice and completely dismantled a community full of women who cared about each other.  If you see me posting it's only to give support to a poster who needs it or to post something important enough that I need to say.  I am no longer responding to  anything other than issues that affect people who I care about*
    37 years old, MH is 42
    TTC since 2010; Dx Unexplained Infertility; possible male factor 
    August 2012 through June 2013:  6 IUIs with clomid and trigger shot, all BFNs
    7/2013, Pregnant! Unmedicated--we were on a treatment break
    8/20/13 no heart beat; 8/23/13 d&c
    3/15/14 IVF #1:  Lupron/Follistim/Menopur; ER 3/10 resulting in four transfer grade blastocysts, transferred one pretty blast and froze the remaining three. BFN. 
    Natural FET in May cancelled because the universe hates me my hormones were not cooperating.
    6/24/14 FET #1: transferred two pretty embryos; BFN   
    8/28/14 FET #2: BFP, ended in Chemical pregnancy

    Done with medical intervention and getting used to the idea of CFNBC.  




    All welcome
    MSU_Girl1202
  • Big ((hugs)) sweetie. Take your time, we are here for you.
    Multiple TTCAL 1IF 3
    imageimage
    DX: stage 2 Endo 2012, PCOS 7/2/14,  HSG 6/11/14, Lefty open!!
    BFP#1, EDD: 4/27/14, Missed EP confirmed: 9/23/13, R tube removal: 9/25/13 
    Clomid/TI #1=BFN, 
    Clomid/TI#2=BFN, Clomid/TI #3=CP
    BFP #2 CP, EDD 7/12/15
    On a treatment break: 2 natural cycles. Saving money, sigh*

    Goodbye my sweet babies. We miss you so much. 
    All Welcome


    MSU_Girl1202
  • I'm sorry things have been tough but I'm glad you've been working on taking care of you. (((Hugs)))

    PgAL welcome


    Married 6/11/2011

    Me & Hubby: 34

    TTC journey started 12/2012

    BFP #1 6/5/2013, MC confirmed 6/26/2013 @ 7 wks

    BFP#2 8/25/2013 MC confirmed 10/16/2013 @ 12 wks (D&C 10/18)

    Diagnosis: unexplained RPL, unexplained IF.

    Also have hypothyroidism

    Started TTC again 12/2013

     

    IUI#1:Clomid CD 3-7, Trigger'ed CD 12. IUI CD 14. BFN

    IUI #2:Letrozole CD 3 - 7, Follistim CD 9, Trigger CD 10, IUI CD12. BFN

    Current plan: IVF with PGD. Antagonist - Vivelle Protocal. Stim start 12/1. ER 12/14.

    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/502498

    image imageimage

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    MSU_Girl1202
  • Huge hugs.  Thinking of you. <3
    Me: 31     DH: 33
    Dx: Me: Recurrent Pregnancy Loss; DH: Low Morphology (2%)
    BFP#1: MC 3/1/11 at 6w1d - EDD 10/21/11
    BFP#2: 5/3/11 - EDD 1/9/12 - DD Born 1/6/12
    image
    TTC #2 since 12/13
    BFP#3: MC 2/8/14 at 4w5d - EDD 10/13/14
    BFP#4: MC 5/6/14 at 4w4d - EDD 1/9/15
    BFP#5: MMC discovered 8/4/14 at 9w1d - D&C 8/5/14 - Baby Boy with Trisomy 16 (maternal origin) - EDD 3/8/15
    BFP#6: CP 11/6/14 at 4w2d - EDD 7/14/15
    IVF #1 with ICSI & PGS: May/June 2015, ER 6/3/15, 17R/17M/15F
    IVF #2 with ICSI & PGS: July 2015, ER 7/16/15, 16R/11M/9F
    PGS results = 6 normal embryos (4 boys, 2 girls)
    FET 9/23/15 = BFFN
    Natural FET 11/4/15 = BFP!
    Beta 9dp5dt = 92

    MSU_Girl1202
  • I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Take all the time you need. ((Hugs))
    MSU_Girl1202
  • big **hugs**
    We met in middle school. We got married 15 years later in a February blizzard of 2010. 
    TTC since February 2010
    Diagnosed with Lyme Disease June 2010 Diagnosed with PCOS March 2011 Diagnosed with Celiac Disease January 2013
    BFP #1: August 25th 2013 EDD May 4th 2014 SCH MC October 3rd 2013
    BFP #2: February 14th 2014 EDD October 25th 2014 CP February 17th 2014

    Naked push-up foreplay pioneer
    MSU_Girl1202
  • Welcome back. It's a tough journey & we all have to do what we need to in order to get by.
    image
    image
    DX: I'm a Recurrent Loser
    Me (35) + DH (37) - Married Sept. 2007
    BFP #1 - DS born 7/11/11
    BFP#2 11/13/13 - EDD 7/29/14 - M/C at 5w3d
    BFP #3 12/28/13 - EDD 9/7/14 - M/C at 4w6d
    BFP#4 3/27/14 -  EDD 12/5/14 - Girl lost to 45X at 8w6d - D&C 
    BFP#5 10/15/14 - EDD 6/30/15 - M/C at 7w2d
    BFP #6 1/5/15 - EDD 9.16.14 [CLICKY for progress]
    In search of a image


    MSU_Girl1202[Deleted User]
  • I'm sorry you're having a rough time *hug*
    I am not sure how to say this without getting a "solicitation" warning so I guess I just say that I am not longer active on THIS site. 



    MSU_Girl1202
  • I was thinking of you the other day.  I'm sorry you are having a hard time. 
    Me: 37                                               
    DH: 45
    BFP #1 3/19/14  EDD 11/29/14 MMC D&C 4/24/14
    BFP #2  12/4/14 Beta #1 218 at 12dpo Beta #2 1055 at 16dpo
    Saw heartbeat 12/29.  Please be a rainbow.
    imagerainbows
              
    All welcome                                   
                              
    MSU_Girl1202
  • I'm so sorry you're having a tough time! So many hugs!
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    MSU_Girl1202
  • So sorry things have been rough, but I'm glad you're seeing someone that's helping! :) HUGE ((hugs)) I hope your EDD passes without too much pain. 
    Married & TTC since 8/3/13
    BFP #1 2/21/14 - EDD 10/23/14 - MMC - D&C 3/25/14
    BFP #2 10/21/14 - EDD 7/3/15 - MMC - Natural 11/27/14

    ~~ ALL ALers WELCOME ~~
    MSU_Girl1202
  • Oh love huge (((((hugs))))).
    Me: 38
    DX:  Adenomyosis, Compounded MTHFR, PAI-1 4G variant

    DH: 34
    MFI due to Testicular Cancer

    Married March 2012 <3
    IVF w/ICSI #1
    10 little polar bears
    FET #1 with 2 polar bears ~Nov 6, 2013 BFN :(
    FET # 2 with 2 more polar bears ~March 19, 2014 BFP!!!
    Beta 1= 276
    Beta 2= 662
    4/19/14 ~ baby A became an angel
    5/02/14 ~ baby B became an angel
    5/3/14 ~ D&C
    FET #3 with 1 male polar bear ~October 3, 2014
    October 13, 2014 ~ BFN
    Fur Children:  Memphis 3y, Dutch 3y, Marcel 2y, Meadow 1y



    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    January 2015 Siggy Challenge TTCAL
    Animals Interacting with Snow

    image


    MSU_Girl1202
  • ((hugs)) I've missed you >:D< I'm glad you're feeling better, love :x
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    Hubs & I -29 • Met 5/18/04 • Married 5/8/10
    BFP #1 DS 2/7/11 (Born @ 34 wks via ECS due to Pre-e) TTC #2 since Aug '13
    DX Low AMH (.58) March '14 • FSH-7.5 • E2-35.5 (Nov '14)
    SA- Great numbers • SIS- Clear (Nov '14)
     Cycle 1- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-BFP • EDD 1/12/15 
    Ectopic @ 5w6d • Methotrexate Shot 5/18/14
    Cycle 2,3,4- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-- BFN
    Cycle 5- Letrozole CD3-7 & Trigger BFFN
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    • Everyone Welcome •
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge • Animal Snow Interactions
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    MSU_Girl1202
  • Welcome back, we are here for you!



    imageimageimage
    image
    My FF Chart:
    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/490dd7
    TTC #3 since June 2013
    BFP #1 7/21/2013--EDD 3/30/14--D&C 9/24/13
    BFP #2 1/28/14--MC 2/7/14

    IUI #1 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #2 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #3 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IVF #1, Stimmed for 12 days, ER 8/22/14, 9 retrieved, 7M, 7F!!  Freeze all due to fluid in uterus.
    FET end of October 2014 cancelled due to fluid in uterus due to possible c-scar defect
    Surgery scheduled 12/12/14 to fix possible isthmocele
    3/26/15 transferred one 8 cell grade 4 embryo and one 6 cell grade 3 embryo = slow rising betas for 2+ weeks = ectopic MTX shot 4/29/15
    Repeat c-scar surgery June 2015
    2nd and last IVF cycle August 2015, stimmed for 12 days, 2 egg retrieved, both mature and both fertilized.  Transferred both 8-cell embryos on Day 3, beta 9/5/15 = BFFN
    MOVING TO ADOPTION!  


    MSU_Girl1202
  • (((Hugs)))

    4 Losses (2003, 2008, Apr 2012, & Oct 2012)
    All RPL and IF testing with multiple REs = normal

    5 IUIs = BFN

    All AL are welcome
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    MSU_Girl1202
  • ((Hugs)) sometimes it is good to step away, we are always here when you need us.

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                ***TTCAL January siggy challenge ***
    MSU_Girl1202
  • ((Hugs)). Sorry you are having a rough time right now. We're here for you.
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge: Animals in the Snow

    image

      
    About Me: 

    AMA 35 :  DH 33
    BFP#1 1/26/14 (EDD: 10/7/14).  MMC 3/10/14 D&C 3/14/14
    RE Consult 11/3/14 - AMH 2.25 "great" . FSH 7.10 . Low Vitamin D
    Myomectomy 12/17/14.  Benched until March.

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    My Ovulation Chart
    MSU_Girl1202
  • ((All the hugs)) I'm sorry things were rough. Welcome back.
    image
    I'll be at a new place providing support. 


    MSU_Girl1202
  • Welcome back, hugs.
    Together since April 2004.  Married since June 19th, 2010.
     BFP #1: January 31st 2012: CP. 
     BFP #2: June 1st 2012, Due:2/8/13. Avery was born via unplanned c section on 2/13/13. 
     BFP #3: Sept. 25th, 2014. Due: 6/5/15.  MMC on 10/23/14. Confirmed complete molar pregnancy per D&C 10/29/14, 
    HCG officially negative 12/10/14.  Benched until June 2015.
                                                        
    image 

    MSU_Girl1202
  • Good to see you back, sorry you had a rough time but I totally get it!  I hope you find yourself in a bit of a better place now.  (((hugs)))

    Me 34 DH 31, Together since 2003, Married August 20, 2011,  TTC since May 2013
    BFP #1 August 24, 2013! MMC discovered Oct. 3, 2013, D&C Oct. 4, 2013
    BFP #2 December 17, 2013! MMC discovered Jan. 28, 2014, D&C Jan. 30, 2014
    Testing done: male with complete Trisomy 16, not hereditary. Tested me for clotting disorders, all normal.
    Feb. 2014 all clear again to TTC!  Will start progesterone supplementation with the next BFP just in case.       Oct. 2014 more testing just because, thyroid and autoimmune panels = normal.  Diagnostic U/S = no abnormalities.  Will keep trying for 3-6 more months, doctor still optimistic!

    BFP #3 December 11, 2014!  Beta #1 14DPO = 122.4 Beta #2 17DPO = 296.8 Please stick little one and be our Rainbow!

            Perfect little heartbeat of 156 seen 1/7/15 :)

    ***Everybody Welcomed***  :)  

    EDD 8/21/2015 Team Green!

    IAmPregnant Tickerrainbows                

     photo Multiple4_zps436a50cc.jpg photo April3_zps882432ab.jpg August 2 

    August 2015 Siggy Challenge: Favorite mean girl from a movie or show:  Kathy Bates in "Misery"

    MSU_Girl1202
  • So many ((Hugs))
    Married: 4/28/12
    BFP: 7/2/14 ;  1st US 7/21/14 Baby measuring 7w5d, HB of 138;  Discovered MMC 8/18/14 at 11w2d, baby measuring 8w5d, no hb ; 8/19/14 D&C
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    TTCAL December siggy challenge - Autocorrect Fails

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    | <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation Tracker</My Chart

    MSU_Girl1202
  • so sorry you hit a rough patch. Welcome back.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers        Daisypath Happy Birthday tickers

    Oct Angel*BFP 1/25/14 * EDD 10/6/14 * US#1 2/26/14 *US#2 3/3/14 no heartbeat*d&c 3/12/14*

    BFP 1/17/15 * EDD 9/30/15

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    MSU_Girl1202
  • ((Hugs)) I'm glad that you did what was right for you. Take care of yourself.

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    BFP: 3/9/2014  EDD: 11/11/2014  MMC: 4/10/2014  D&C: 4/11/2014
    MSU_Girl1202
  • (Hugs)

    Me: 31 DH: 36
    Dated Since ‘02, Married in ‘06
    BFP#1 05/16/06, EDD01/16/07, MC 06/12/06 at 8 weeks
    BFP #2 08/14/14, EDD 04/22/15, MC 09/17/14 at 9 weeks

    image 

     My Chart

    MSU_Girl1202
  • (((Hugs))) I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. Take as much time as you need and I'm glad to hear you are taking care of yourself.
    TTC: Since July 2013
    BFP #1: EDD 05/27/2014 (D&C 10/17/2014)
    MSU_Girl1202
  • I have also been in and out of TTCAL lately, but feel as though I'm in a much better place than I was a few months ago. Welcome back and lots of love to you!
    "Once you are real, you can't become unreal again.  It lasts for always." ~ The Velveteen Rabbit

    *8.3.13*  mc @ 6-7 weeks {natural mc at 12 weeks}
    *3.14.14*  mc @ 5-6 weeks DnC {blood clotting disorder discovered}
    *8.7.14* mc @ 6 weeks DnC {uterine septum removed March '14)
    *3.17.15* mc @ 7 weeks DnC {genetic testing & meeting with a new RE in Jan '15}
    *8.31.16* mc @ 8 weeks DnC {genetic testing, new medications upon next pregnancy}
    *7.17.16* praying everyday for my rainbow baby {progesterone supplements, blood thinning injections}


    MSU_Girl1202
  • So Sorry you are having a rough time **HUGS**

    BFP #1 05/03/12 DD: 12/18/12
    BFP #2 05/26/14 MMC: 6/26/14 D&C: 7/18/14
    BFP #3 10/09/14 MC 10/24/14


    MSU_Girl1202
  • Welcome back from a newbie :)
    Me: 26 DH:28
    TTC - Sept 2014
    # 1 BFP - October 5, 2014 EDD June 5, 2015 CP - October 14, 2014


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    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge: Animal Interactions in the Snow
    MSU_Girl1202
  • Oh honey, I'm so sorry that you've been struggling, but I'm glad to see that you are strong enough to come back here.  I took a similar break after my last loss, so I understand completely.  Take care of yourself!
    TTC #3 since 8/2012 image
    DX Endometriosis 2/2002 (lost left tube due to a cyst), PCOS
    6/2010
     BFP - 10/18/2012, EDD - 6/26/2013, Baby Girl lost at 22 weeks (T21), D&E 2/15/2013
    BFP - 4/23/2014, EDD - 1/2/2015 Twin Boys lost at 12 weeks, M/C 6/25/2014

    My chart here  All ALers welcome!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    June 3Missing Our January Snowflake
    MSU_Girl1202
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