Letting Go of IF Siggy

AMShark

Every once in a while, I look at one of my own posts, and I wonder if I should remove the details of my IF journey from my signature.  And I feel torn - part of me wants to move on and concentrate on the success we're enjoying now, and part of me wants to leave it alone, because I should never forget what it took to get here..

Has anyone else had this struggle?  Has anyone removed the IF details from their siggy?  Any regrets?

weansworld09

I rarely post outside of mobile bumping. So, I suppose the thought hasn't crossed my mind much as of now.

southernyankeegirl

I condensed.  To me, it's an important part of my story.  It also gives me great joy to see others on the pregnancy & parenting boards with infertility histories in their siggies, and I know it gave me a lot of hope back when I was still struggling to see those who had achieved success.

I often felt forgotten by those 3T graduates who wanted to "forget" their infertility and erase that part of their history.  I understand logically why people want to focus on the positive and not the struggles, but when I was still struggling it often felt like people "moved on", which made me feel more alone.  Being an IF ally is very important to me, so I keep a condensed version of my history in my siggy.

starlightgator

I have been posting from mobile too, so no chance for changing it now. But, I also agree with PP's that the journey was life-changing and I want to be able to offer support to others that have similar journeys. Lastly, I'm still scared that we may have to begin again. Very worried about something bad happening in this pregnancy. So, it stays as is for now.

kmc84

I have a 20 month old and I still can't get rid of it! I have condensed over time, but IF will always be part of my history. We went through so much for A, and this one was not easy either!

gsancho

I condensed a bit, but I like having it so those who lurk from 3T/IF or early BFPs can see my history.  I lurked and looked at other ladies info when I was in the 2ww and found it comforting to see ladies with similar dx and retrieval numbers as me with BFPs.  I've also had a few people still TTC email me questions based off what's on my siggy, so I think it's helpful.  

I do contemplate removing my badge eventually (gasp!)...but I can't let it go, quite yet.

Grateful&Thankful

For me- I leave it for my fellow sisters in the struggle. I have some info in there that may help someone who has a similar dx or prompt them to send me a pm with a specific question. It's definitely a part of me that I could not get rid of or forget even if the words weren't there any longer.

Neesey

I have left it because I still struggle with being the "just stop trying and it will happen" girl. I think it is more of a reminder to me what we went through to get here. It has opened the door to talk to other bumpies about deciding to be cf and then having to adjust to a bfp whether through treatment or surprise. I will probably remove my badges but just haven't gotten around to it yet.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

poohniki

Wow. I never even thought about it. I know I want to keep most of it since I feel my story is not like others and my egg disorder is rare. I think my IF journey is a huge part of who I am. Maybe once the baby is born I should condense it- but my history is so long- would just summarize my last cycle.

Julie21613

To be honest I never even thought about it.  I know before IVF worked for us (5th fresh cycle) I would come to this board and read everyone's siggy's.  It gave me such hope that it would work for me.  And, that cycle only 1 egg was retrieved and that 1 egg became our DD.  So if my siggy can give a little hope to all the women still waiting for their miracles, I will probably leave it as is.  (although its so darned long they may fall asleep reading it)!

jessimi06

Like others, I'll condense mine but I'll always have it on (I may eventually remove my badges). IF has been a huge part of our lives the past few years, that I feel it'll always color our lives in some way. Seeing other peoples siggys were always comforting me to as well and gave me hope.

Momarazzi007

I will probably keep mine in the siggy, it's been a long road and it is easy to forget. I want to remember it all and our losses. I hug my girl extra tight and I will my baby boy too. I know some people will never get it, and that is ok, it's my history and my family's pain. But for those who do- they know I will get them too.

happygirl1013

Everyone is totally different, and there is no right or wrong decision.  I personally decided, when I was having a really rough time shedding my IF mindset early in my pregnancy and it was literally taking over my pregnancy, I shed my IF signature to help me mentally move past it.  Do whatever feels right.

mrs.willie

I hadn't thought a whole lot about it, but did keep mine up because I know TTC #1 after my first two m/c's it helped me to see other people going through the same and it working for them. Now especially TTC #2 AD seeing others after the horrific ectopic and tube removal, it definitely helped me. I want others to know it is still possible and they're not alone in their struggle. You can still "move on" with your success and enjoy it. Whatever you decide is ok.

rella22

I also have left mine.  I remember looking back at others' siggy's to see similarities and hope for success at the end of that 2ww.  I think it has truly become a part of who I am and where I am today.  Even if it was a struggle...I am so glad to show my struggle with my success!!

MrsLolaSky

Hi everyone!

AMShark - thank you for this thread! I had been thinking about this lately, and it is nice to see others' opinions on this.

I recently decided to remove some of the details of our IF journey. Our diagnosis was/is MFI, and I just didn't want to have that detailed information about my DH's SAs on every message that I posted. My DH's numbers were bad all on all dimensions, and we were preparing/saving for IVF when our miracle happened… TI, too, because our IUI was cancelled due to me ovulating early. I decided that while it might provide some hope/information to those looking for that kind of hope (yes… it is possible to get pregnant naturally with consistent SAs of less than 4-10 mill/ml sperm count, less than 12% motility, and 0% morphology… confirmed that there was no improvement with a third SA after we got lucky), I worried it might provide false hope to those who might not be so lucky. I don't know what DH and I will decide to do if we start thinking about possibly giving our little miracle Bean a sibling.

Anyway… just thought I'd give my point of view since I seem to be in the minority on removing my IF details. It isn't that I'm trying to forget about this chapter in our lives. It was a painful time, but it was important, and I feel blessed every time I think about our Bean.

MKateG

I've never thought about removing my IF journey, I did condense it. I feel like I wouldn't be the person I am today without that history. It's a-part-of-me and will always be. I do feel like I'm moving into another chapter of my IF journey now that I'm only a month away from having my babies here. But even though I will have these two little miracles that I definitely am not going to take for granted (& thank God everyday that I've been blessed with them), I will forever be haunted by IF.

I also like seeing other women's siggies that have been through IF. You just never know who may see your siggy (& what they are going through) that you provide a glimmer of hope to.