Intro

ekc0630 · November 2014

Good Morning all,

A little about my story. My husband and I tried to have children for 7 years. After many unsuccessful IUI's we finally did IVF the first was a chemical pregnancy the second resulted in TWINS! We were thrilled. As the pregnancy went on we had the first trimester screening which showed that one of our babies had the chance for Downs Syndrome. We were prepared and ready to handle anything. We had been through the ringer anyways. At our next ultrasound they did an echo which showed an atriovantricular septal defect (hole in the middle of the heart) we were told that after the baby was born they would be able to fix the heart at around 6 months of age. At 20 weeks I had another echo no changes and 5 days later I had a follow up with my OB. At that appointment I found out I had lost baby A. I was alone at the appointment because the one before was so routine and this was just for the OB to check on me my ultrasounds were done at MFM. I remember staring at the screen waiting to see him move. He looked so peaceful. I continued on with my pregnancy carrying both babies. At 29 weeks my water broke. SHOCK! With how much water we were convinced it was our survivor. Well it wasn't. I delivered my angel at 29 weeks and my survivor stayed put in the hospital until week 33. We were released and I returned to work for 10 days. At that point I was 35 and having what my nurse practitioner said were Braxton Hicks contractions.....After 5 hours of these said Braxton hicks contractions being less than 3 min apart We went to the hospital to find out I was 5cm dilated and 80% effaced. We were having a baby. After 22 hours of not much progress they broke my water and my miracle baby was here October 31, 2014. yes this halloween. I find myself staring at him and wondering what Jonathan (my angel) would have looked like, or what it would have been like to wake up in the middle of the night to 2 babies. Jackson is now 3 weeks and doing great. We had some weight issues to begin with but he has recovered and is gaining weight. How do you talk to your baby/child about their brother or sister that was lost. I mean he was a twin shared the same space for almost 30 weeks. His birth certificate will say twin..... Any advice would be appreciated.

Mom2anAngel2 · November 2014

Welcome and congrats on your little Jackson. I am very sorry for the loss of you precious Jonathan. ((HUGS)). I don't have any advise about talking to a child as my DS is only going to be 2 in January. However, ou first DS (not a twin) is very much a part of our lives still today. We visit him in the cemetery regularly and there are "things" around the house, such as foot prints. I'm sure some other ladies will have more advise, if not, you may want to ask on the "Loss" board. Most of ladies there had late or infant losses and may have more advise.

Wifey xo · November 2014

Welcome, and congratulations on the arrival of your son. I was pregnant with my son 4 months after losing my twin boys (& on 5 months bed rest), and definitely have many moments when I look at him and wonder what his brothers would have looked like. I imagine you have been holding your breath for many months, and as you exhale, trying to grieve during such a blissful time. Take care of you, take care of your sweet boy, and you will find the right words when the time is right.