WWYD: daycare

snicksnack

I posted a while back in regards to my concern over the turnover in my four-year old's classroom. Right now she is on her forth teacher since September this teacher is from the center and is only suppose to be there until jan when the new teacher will be trained, although she may stay if she likes it she normally teaches toddlers. My daughter said on Friday that the teacher yells, threatened to throw her pillow away during nap time because my daughter was moving around, and told another child if he acted like a baby he was going to the baby room. I know this child, a boy, has behavior issues as it has come up before from the assistant directer that the child is often sent to her office. I also know there are two boys with behavior issues and rumor has it those issues are behind at least one of the teacher exits. I don't think my daughter is telling stories so I am debating on showing up on Monday at nap time and asking to watch the room via video so the teacher does not know I am watching and also does not know I am coming. I don't know if I should do that or talk to the teacher. The teacher is not there at drop off or pickup so that makes it hard. Any advice? I don't want my daughter subjected to yelling and threats I get kids can make someone go crazy but we don't displine that way at home and it is not the philosophy of the center. Also she has not had bad behavior reports ever from school. I would hope if she was disruptive enough to be threatened someone would tell me. Tia sorry for no paragraphs I am on my phone.

snicksnack

My daughter also told stories of several other kids being threatened with having their blankets, pillows etc. Taken Away either to the trash or her house. Along with yelling throughout the day.

shakinros

If watching the video feed is an option, then yes definitely do it and don't give them a heads up that you're coming. Just to know what's going on in that room!

fitmom82

This doesn't sound like that big of a deal, certainly not concerning enough to spy on the teacher.  I'd talk to the director to get a better understanding of what is actually going on.  All teachers are going to loose their cool and may raise their voice occasionally.  I don't think telling a child you'll take their blanket or pillow is too harsh, neither would telling a child they're going to the baby room for acting up.  You seem to follow gossip and drama too much, whether you're hearing it from a 4 year old or about the teachers.

I would not feel comfortable teaching a child whose parent would rather spy on me than speak to me and I'd ask the child to be removed from my class, although I teach middle school where that option may be a little more realist.  If I need to speak to the teacher and don't think I'll see her at pick up, I call during nap time.

rboisvert

Just a through but the center may have a policy to let the teacher know when the room is being viewed.  My center (where I've been a special ed teacher and my daughter attends preschool) we have a policy that when anyone is in the observation room, the classroom is notified.  Also are you going to actually be able to see anything?  When we have our lights off there's not enough ambient light to see what's going on.  

snicksnack

Thanks for the replies. I think I am just going to nicely ask her how my
Daughter is doing with naps and see what she says. I can bring the pillow question up then. After thinking about it problaby best to talk to the teacher first. The video is not available online but it can be watched at any time in the office. If the yelling continues i know my daughter wil tell me without me asking. It came up this time because she said at dinner she hopes this teacher is not her new teacher and then started talking.

djm31012

If you are not comfortable, I think there is nothing wrong with a random pop in. But I also agree with talking to the teacher/director and expressing your concerns.  There is nothing wrong with highlighting the fact that you arent comfortable with all of the recent changes and you dont think your family is connecting with the new teacher.

MickeyM04

Hmmm...this is hard.  I agree that I would expect teachers to kind of lose their sh*t every once in awhile, but at the same time, since I am paying for childcare, I expect it to be professional.  Like obviously I have days at work where I want to literally throw my computer at the next person to walk through my door, but instead, I have to think of a calm, firm, professional way to tell them to leave me alone.  I would expect the same from a DC teacher, even if you're dealing with kids.  I would not be pleased if DS told me that his teacher threatened to throw his pillow or his blanket away.  What I would expect, if he was misbehaving is:  a) some sort of report on that, which you've said you aren't getting.  This leads me to wonder if they're threatening the pillow/blanket take-away even though she's not really misbehaving (e.g. "Go to sleep right now or I'm taking your pillow and your blanket and throwing them away") which I think is inappropriate, or why they aren't communicating with you that she is misbehaving.  Then b) I would expect something shy of threats if the teacher is losing her sh*t or the child is misbehaving (e.g. "It's nap time and you are being very loud and disruptive.  If you don't lay down quietly like your friends, I am going to put your cot, your pillow, and your blanket away, and you will have to sit quietly on the rug/floor/at the table until naptime is over").  Honestly any report of yelling would bother me.  I'm not allowed to yell at my job when someone is being a dick, so why should people who are at their job (DC) be permitted to yell at my child.  You know what I mean?  There are ways to discipline without yelling.

I would talk to the teacher about it directly in a constructive way.  Ask if DD is having trouble at naptime, because she told you XYZ...does she have any concerns she would like to address with you...is there anything you can do at home to reinforce good behavior...etc.