Clicky Poll - Booze for Babies

GraceInCA

OK well maybe not babies, but for kids of some age.

riansmommie

I was allowed one alcoholic beverage on holidays/family get togethers. I was about 9/10 when I was allowed to start. At that age it always tasted gross to me so I would usually have a sip or two and be done with it. At Christmas I was also given a few of the little chocolates with liquor inside of them, those were and still are my fav. My DD (who is 8) has tried them, her face was priceless.

needanustart

I think I've established my "live and let drink" style of parenting on here. I wouldn't offer it necessarily, but if they ask about it at a family gathering it's no biggie for me. I will not however be allowing other children to drink at my house and in no way want to establish myself as the "cool parent who let's the kids drink."

momofcatan

We had wine at every Friday night dinner and ever since I can remember I was allowed to have some. My cousins and I had special shot glasses that they would fill up for us so I guess I never had more than an oz or two. If my kid(s) want to have when we are having I don't see any problem. I think it makes it less mysterious and appealing when they are older.

I used to hate it when my MIL made a big deal out of her younger kids getting a couple oz of wine with dinner.

GraceInCA

I was drinking at a young age. I was always allowed to share my dad's drink with him (usually beer or wine), but by the time I was 8 or 9 years old I was served my own little portions during some dinners or special occasions. Hard liquor was something he had after dinner or when socializing with friends, so I might try a sip, but I was never interested in those drinks (I am now).  My husband's parents were equally easygoing with their kids.  My husband remembers drinking beer growing up.  My son is the same way as I was when I was a kid.  We let him drink from our drinks. He doesn't like beer or any hard liquor at all, usually only wants a single sip if it's white wine, and he doesn't like red wine. The one thing he does like is hard apple cider, so I let him share it with me at dinner sometimes.

I grew up with really healthy attitudes about drinking, and wasn't one of those teens/college kids who was a binge drinker.  I hope my kids end up the same way.

LaBellaVida

No. They can drink in my home when they are of age.

Ds1 has had wine once. We were doing communion at church and he grabbed the wine cup, instead of the juice on accident.

ASmallWonder

I'm not anti-let them have a sip but my father is an alcoholic so it definitely makes me, as Aiden would say "noorviss"

LaBellaVida

ASmallWonder said:

I'm not anti-let them have a sip but my father is an alcoholic so it definitely makes me, as Aiden would say "noorviss"

This is my reason too. My No one in my family is an alcoholic, but DH has struggled with alcohol, and part of his family struggles with alcohol, among other substances.
It's Def. A very touchy subject with me, and I'd rather not have my kids be around it, or taste it. They can make that decision when they're of age.

nikel13

I was allowed to have small portions at special occasions, such as New Years.  I'll let Lily have sips when younger and her own little bit when older.  I would rather teach her to have a healthy relationship with alcohol than not have one until she is 18 and crazy about it.

daffy2k

My parents divorced when I was 3. My mom was/is extremely strict when it comes to alcohol. We did get wine at communion, they never offered juice for the kids? My dad on the other hand never had a problem letting us have a sip here and there. We didn't get our own beer, and it's not like they'd give us a glass of wine at supper, but it wasn't so forbidden. I tend to lean towards this way of thinking, but my H has really struggled with alcohol abuse and his dad is an alcoholic. It's definitely a pattern that runs in their family and I haven't really come up with a game plan as to how I'm going to manage this.

needanustart

ASmallWonder said:

I'm not anti-let them have a sip but my father is an alcoholic so it definitely makes me, as Aiden would say "noorviss"

It's really interesting how I feel like this topic can go either way with substance abuse in a family. My mother's side has a strong alcoholic line (2 of her 3 siblings had problems) and she was in a strict no-alcohol household. My father however was raised with red wine at dinner and coffee for breakfast since he was a wee one (the Sicilian side) and there is no substance abuse anywhere in the family. I find it really interesting how much genetics plays into addiction and how nurture can affect it somewhat but not necessarily control it.   

daffy2k

calikat80 said:

ASmallWonder said:

I'm not anti-let them have a sip but my father is an alcoholic so it definitely makes me, as Aiden would say "noorviss"

It's really interesting how I feel like this topic can go either way with substance abuse in a family. My mother's side has a strong alcoholic line (2 of her 3 siblings had problems) and she was in a strict no-alcohol household. My father however was raised with red wine at dinner and coffee for breakfast since he was a wee one (the Sicilian side) and there is no substance abuse anywhere in the family. I find it really interesting how much genetics plays into addiction and how nurture can affect it somewhat but not necessarily control it.   

that's really where I'm struggling. DH's parents divorced and he was raised my his mom and stepdad. While his mom was aware, obviously, of her ex's issues I've never got the impression that they were strictly no booze. My H was really a troublemaker though, played competitive hockey and the jocks started partying young. I don't think my MIL could ever get a handle on him, coupled with the fact that he is exactly like his dad, led him down a pretty shitty path of drinking and partying way too much. My H's issues with alcohol are so psychological and he has always struggled with self-control. Because I've seen him control all of it for quite a while now I know he doesn't have near the level of problems that his dad does, but it's really clear that the desire stems from the same place. The fact that I know there is definitely a genetic tie to their alcohol problems is where I'm having trouble deciding how to handle it.

WasNotWas

As far as I'm concerned it's against the law until they are 21

daffy2k

WasNotWas said:

As far as I'm concerned it's against the law until they are 21

this was the attitude my mom always took with us, except it's legal at 18 here. I think it's the most clear cut way to handle it, and probably the one that will cause me the least amount of stress. Now to figure out how to deal with high school parties...

numbersgirl08

WasNotWas said:

As far as I'm concerned it's against the law until they are 21

I agree.  But I hope to take some trips to Europe with my kids for a special occasion, like graduating high school.  I will probably be ok with them drinking with us when we travel abroad.

WasNotWas

@numbersgirl08 said:

WasNotWas said:

As far as I'm concerned it's against the law until they are 21

I agree.  But I hope to take some trips to Europe with my kids for a special occasion, like graduating high school.  I will probably be ok with them drinking with us when we travel abroad.

Yep I have no issue with this. As long as it's the law where we are we will follow

Lizzybizzy80

I may allow some at home (or in Europe) when he is in high school, like my parents did. Just B, not his friends.

More importantly, I want to set a good example for B with drinking (this clearly will take some work and is not something I had growing up).

ilovemarfa

I remember my dad letting me have a sip of beer when he had parties at our house when I was around 12/13. Same for my brothers. I will probably let the boys have a taste when they are around that age- if I'm ever drinking around them. I am not a big alcohol drinker though and I never drink at home by myself, so it will be a rare occurance if they see me with a drink in my hand. I won't ever allow them just to drink a full drink around the house until they are of legal drinking age, or if they are enlisted the military and under 21 ( I think if you're old enough to fight for our country you should be allowed to drink). I think a kid is going to binge drink when they get to college if they want to, regardless if they grew up being allowed to drink at home or not.

musicalsilver

WasNotWas said:

As far as I'm concerned it's against the law until they are 21

Which it totally is in FL, so I definitely respect this.

I'm glad that I live in a state where it's legal to let minors drink with parental consent on private (non-alcohol selling) property.

My parents were very easy going about alcohol.  We were always allowed to have a taste if we wanted.  Neither my brother nor I enjoyed it for a really long time (late teens?) - and when we did we were allowed to have a small drink with our parents.  I think this has definitely contributed to my healthy attitude towards alcohol.  

DH has slightly different feelings on the subject, as he had a much stricter upbringing, but I think we've discussed it enough to where he sees the merit in my position.  We'll be revisiting this in future as necessary.

GraceInCA

mcbush said:

I'm very anti "forbidden fruit". I will offer tastes of what we are having. They won't get a full glass of it until they are 18 likely. But I would share a drink with them in their teens. @GraceInCA‌ how old is your son? Does he get a buzz off the hard cider at all?

He's almost in middle school! He doesn't get a buzz at all.  He probably has a total of 2 ounces, maybe 3 over the span of an hour, and it never has any effect on him.

ColieAnn31

This is a hard one for me. Alex and I haven't discussed it but alcoholism runs on both sides of our families.

BC&LM

No. My child can have alcohol when he turns twenty one or when he decides to drink behind my back before then ;-) We hardly ever drink anymore, so I don't see the point in serving him alcohol, especially since I have some family (not my siblings or parents, but other relatives) that were alcoholics.