No one ever told me

FishyMom

So we all have things about pregnancy or postpartum that we have encountered and no one told you would happen...

We all have the things everyone says.. Your life will change, you won't sleep, blah blah blah...

What are some things you have experienced that no one ever told you about?

FishyMom

For me it is ALL the waiting and how hard it is.... You start with the TWW which is hard especially with IF.. Then you wait for that 1st ultrasound which feels harder than the TWW... Then when you get moved to your OB the appointments are 4 weeks apart, which seems like a lifetime after being at an RE... And I am currently experiencing the hardest wait of them all (I think) which is waiting for labor to come... You wait all this time to get to your EDD and then it comes and goes and your are still pregnant.. From weeks 38 and on you analyze every twinge and know it could be any moment. This wait seems harder because it has such an ambiguous date.. You don't know when it will happen.. With the TWW you know how long the wait is, same with the appointments- there is a date, but with labor it could be a 4-5 weeks span. My fair warning, this wait sucks and it is harder than all the others combined!!

kmc84

Lol- so I was surprised pp at how much blood you actually lose! I'm a nurse (not l&d ) and honest to goodness if I had a pt bleeding like I did pp, I would be very concerned!

Seriously, every trip to the bathroom in the hospital was like a massacre..... I had some golf ball sized clots.. I asked my nurse about it and she was so calm about it and said 'oh we don't get concerned unless the clots are plum to peach sized' lol-just such a different work in l&d/pp!

(I don't say that to scare anyone, just found it very surprising myself!)

AMShark

How paranoid I would be about things that can go wrong with a pregnancy.  DH & I are having trouble doing any real planning for these babies, and I think it's because we're both afraid they will never be born.  No serious name discussions, no baby shopping & no registry started, - we haven't even started cleaning out one of the spare bedrooms for a nursery - or (and this could end up being a huge issue if we don't snap out of it) figured out what type of child care we will need after my maternity leave is over.

Right now, I'm 16w4d, so I know I have time for some things, but since I'm having twins, I also know I'm more at risk for premature births and/or time incapacitated on bed rest - or just for being really huge and awkward, so I really should get moving on preparing while I'm still capable of doing anything, but its just so hard to get out of the "waiting for failure" mindset.

southernyankeegirl

A good one - no one told me that being pregnant could make me feel so good. I was expecting all the nausea and aches and pains and tiredness (and while I never got nauseous, my food aversions and body discomforts haven't always been fun and I got really good at naps during 1st Tri). However, I was completely surprised by how good I have felt being pregnant! I love my body, I love how I feel, and the discomforts and inconveniences are so much more minor than I ever expected. I know this isn't the case for every pregnancy, but I feel very lucky that it has been my experience.

A not-so-good one - no one ever told me how unprepared I would feel at this point (32 weeks). I have always researched everything in my life intensely - I could have written a guide book on infertility by the time our IUI worked. I have read pregnancy books, watched birthing videos, talked to friends - despite all the info, I still feel really naive and apprehensive about going into labor and delivering this baby. I am doing exactly what I had previously rolled my eyes at my friends for doing - trusting my doctor, hoping that I can manage the pain, and tentatively planning an epidural. If that epidural doesn't work or something goes not according to plan, I guess wing it? Part of me hopes baby is breach (I doubt it) so we can just schedule a c-section. While I would much prefer a vaginal birth for the recovery and other health benefits, having an idea what to expect seems kind of a relief.

Aurora1181

That life will change, but totally for the better. That my relationship with my spouse will be tested, but I'll learn again how awesome he is. That I will think about and talk about bodily fluids (milk, poop, pee) all day every day. That other peoples baby showers will still kind of sting, but it won't be as bad as before.

xc1148

Agree with PP...IF brain never goes away. I thought I'd be so happy when the doctor called and told me about the BFP, and I was, for a day lol. Then it was 12 weeks of panic.

How much the first tri hurts! Lots of cramping, pulling, stretching...really odd.

Agree with PP...I feel great being pregnant. My skin is better, I feel better (probably because I'm not drinking, eating a ton of veggies, exercising regularly and putting "me" first so I'm a healthy host for baby) and I love it. I can't wait to meet my baby but I'm going to miss being pregnant.

ttuprincess

I'm with you @ashris13.  I am not as close to my EDD as you, but I never imagined the wait when you are so close, yet so far would be so excruciating.  I have had an incredibly easy pregnancy up until now.  But in my opinion, the end is HARD.  I am incredibly miserable physically, and every day that there is no labor feels like weeks.  Up until about the last couple of weeks time has flown by.  But here at the end it seems time stands still. 

Hoping you get to meet your LO soon!  ((hugs))

mdiblasi10

No one ever told me, or really could tell me, how amazing it would be to become a Mom. I love every single minute of it, even the hard parts. The love I have for this little being is so overwhelming, it's crazy. Every night I put him to bed, I miss that time away from him. DH and I are just so in love with him and everything he does. It irritates me to no end when people only tell expecting parents "your life is over", "you'll never sleep again", blah blah, negative, negative. I know some parents feel that way (and frankly that makes me sad for their children), but I don't, so not everyone thinks of parenting in such a negative light. 

Robeano

That after you give birth you still won't be able to sleep on your stomach for ages. I was very disappointed by this discovery 

That you will do stuff you swore you'd never do b/c sometimes peace, or sleep are more important

That you can love someone you just met with your whole entire being. As PP said you are so selfless, I've never thought of anybody else ahead of myself like this before.

That I would eat food a toddler has man handled, b/c they are sharing and it's so cute seeing them be proud to give you something.

chrissynena

That those pp hormones are no joke!!

That I never knew I could love someone so much that I still could cry thinking about it. And that the love for MH would go to a whole different level.

happygirl1013

That at every stage of pregnancy there's a new host of problems to worry about!  We were batting IF for so long, I never thought about the whole host of issues that come with actually being pregnant.  It's been an amazing journey though!

mrsrichey11

No one told me I would pee my pants as an adult. Like, not just a little from laughing or sneezing, I'm talking puddle on the floor at my feet. Also, how unprepared and overwhelmed I would feel and that its ok to feel that way. I had an anxiety attack a couple of days ago when I started thinking about the cost of just daycare alone for my twins. Every other expense I can handle, but freaking daycare is what is making me stress out.