SWMR - rough morning

dglvrk2

I need a re-do of this morning.  

I'm a teacher, so I have to be at my school by a certain time.  I do DC drop offs most mornings....Every minute counts between DC drop-off (as soon as it opens; 15 minutes before I have to be at work) and getting to work on time. 

This morning we had car trouble.  I had to call DH to help me.  He snapped at me when I got frustrated over the phone.  I, in turn, snapped at DD 1 (3 yrs old) when she started crying.  

Worse, I told her the car trouble was her dad's fault.  This is sort of true, but I PROMISED myself I would never say anything negative about H to my daughters.  My parents often mistook me for a marriage therapist until I was old enough to explain to them they needed professional help and I could not and did not want to deal with their problems.  Hence, I don't want my daughters to go down that road. 

H was pissed when he arrived and helped me with the car.  

We got to daycare late.  I dropped the girls at the door, but DD1 started crying that she didn't want me to leave. She's never done that before.  

I'm feeling awful.  

I know it's my own doing, but has anyone else had a bad morning lately?  Just knowing I'm not the only one may help me get through the day.  Tonight will be better.

TIA

MickeyM04

I'm so sorry about your morning.  Nothing feels quite so bad as losing your temper/snapping at your kids when you're mad about something else.

We had a crappy morning too.  Put DS in a new sweater that zips at the neck (like from the nipples up is the length of the zipper).  He got to school and insisted he had to take his "coat" (the sweater) off.  Kept unzipping the zipper and trying to pull his shirt off.  We tried to explain that it wasn't a coat, it was a sweater with a zipper, just like his one piece jammies have a zipper and they aren't a coat.  After a huge meltdown tantrum, we took the sweater off and got one of his spare shirts that we keep there and gave it to him so we could put that on.  He decided he didn't want to wear that shirt either.  It is 25 degrees here today. He is not wearing a t-shirt.  After pleading with him about putting any shirt on (a daycare spare, the sweater, whatever), and him screaming and crying and throwing himself on the floor, the morning teacher suggested we leave both shirts on the counter for him and leave, and give him time to relax and then pick out his own shirt.  I trusted that she probably knew how to handle the situation and left him in his room wearing a t-shirt on a 25 degree day.  He wouldn't say goodbye or kiss me goodbye because I make him wear clothes, and I felt like he was probably freezing.

Fast forward 5 minutes when we're dropping DD in her room, the teacher pops her head in (connected rooms) and says, "He decided he wanted to wear his sweater after all."  Face palm.

mlee116

Oh, we've definitely been there.  Just last week, we had a morning where DH wasn't helping get DS ready, so I was running late and DS wanted to do everything himself, but took an eternity doing it.  I lost my patience and yelled at him, which I never do, and he started crying and told me that I hurt his feelings. I apologized and we hugged it out, but I still felt like the biggest butthole ever.  

Some mornings are just rough.  I try to remind myself that normally our mornings go smoothly and everyone is happy, so there are bound to be some stinkers in there.  And I try to see it as a learning opportunity.  Sometimes moms and dads get angry and don't handle it in the best way, so we have to apologize just like he does when he gets angry.

MommyAtty

Is it a phase of the moon? This morning DD slept late, which she never does. So I had a clue something was wrong. Yep, snotty nose and fever. So I had to suck out her nose, which she hates. She was crying and flailing around when I saw DH walking upstairs holding DS at arm's length and muttering swear words under his breath. What's wrong? DS has spit up on the rug and the carpet and himself and has a dirty diaper. DH opens diaper and, as DD yelled for a good 15 minutes, "There is doo doo everywhere!" There is so much poop that we cut DS's onesie off of him, DH strips off his work clothes, and DS gets an unscheduled bath. In the meantime, DD gets a dose of Tylenol, the housekeeper shows up ("good morning, Laura. Can you please start downstairs as my husband and baby are both running around naked upstairs as a result of an epic crap."), the guys rebuilding our fence show up, and my car must be moved out of the driveway. It. Was. Awesome.

potbellypig

Yesterday, DH was going hunting. The kids slept in (of course they would on a work day). I work at 8:00. We woke up at 7:40. I had decided to try "crimping" my hair by braiding it the night before - epic fail. I look like I got electrocuted in my sleep. DS wanted to dress herself, in my rush I let her pick out a summer dress (hello we live in Canada and there's already a foot of snow here) with pants that she put on backwards and inside out. I sent DS to daycare in his dirty pjs. My house is still a mess from the rush yesterday. I snapped at DH for not thinking that if we weren't up already, maybe he should check to see if I had forgotten to set the alarm.

I would say that 95% of my morning are harried and pathetically disorganized. I have no idea how to change this though and not being able to get my act together in the morning really depresses me and makes me feel like an abysmal failure. I don't see it getting any better with the addition of another baby, either. I work in a place that has a start time of 8:00, but since I'm the manager of my department and my supervisor is super lax, I get away with showing up by 8:30. I would never survive in a private-sector job.

I feel like I hijacked your thread, sorry.

dglvrk2

^^ No.  I needed to read that I'm not alone.  Most of my mornings DO go well.  We are usually pretty organized.  I know I"m usually not in the best of moods in the morning so I try really hard to set my family and my students up for success by preparing the day/night before.  

Thanks, Mamas!

potbellypig

ClaryPax said:

This morning was smooth, but I had that morning where DH's battery died.  It was his fault but not I guess because he hadn't driven his car, he had a rental car for the last 6 weeks for work, and it was 10 degrees out there.  Do you think you might start your car every once in a while to charge the battery?  Then he went to get cables so I could jump start his car, but since I have a hybrid it can't jump start other cars.  So then he went back to the store to get the battery charger, they the nice people felt bad for him, and came to our house about a mile away to jump start his car rather then have him buy the 100+ battery charger.  I was late to work, the kids were outside in the cold. I was pissed!  Also there was the time (after work) that I worked late.  I got the car stuck at work in the mud because the snow drifts had melted but not all the way so when pulling out one tire had to go on the grass a little bit, which because the weather had warmed up was no longer frozen.  I couldn't get out called triple A for a tow, DH was being an a-hole and so was his boss and refused to pick up the kids.  He was about an hour away, and it was 45 min to closing time at DC.  His boss scheduled a 7 pm call at 5 pm.  So I had to borrow a co=workers car to get the kids, call the DC that I would be late.  My H had to call triple A because they were mad I wasn't there.  Triple A had to deal with my co-worker instead of me.  Then I had to switch car seats drive a half hour to pick up the kids in my co-workers car drive a half hour back to work switch car seats to my car, go to Mcdonalds for dinner and drive a half hour back home and we got home at like 8:30 pm.  Meanwhile, DH's 7 pm call was canceled. 

That sounds terrible.

dglvrk2

potbellypig said:

ClaryPax said:

This morning was smooth, but I had that morning where DH's battery died.  It was his fault but not I guess because he hadn't driven his car, he had a rental car for the last 6 weeks for work, and it was 10 degrees out there.  Do you think you might start your car every once in a while to charge the battery?  Then he went to get cables so I could jump start his car, but since I have a hybrid it can't jump start other cars.  So then he went back to the store to get the battery charger, they the nice people felt bad for him, and came to our house about a mile away to jump start his car rather then have him buy the 100+ battery charger.  I was late to work, the kids were outside in the cold. I was pissed!  Also there was the time (after work) that I worked late.  I got the car stuck at work in the mud because the snow drifts had melted but not all the way so when pulling out one tire had to go on the grass a little bit, which because the weather had warmed up was no longer frozen.  I couldn't get out called triple A for a tow, DH was being an a-hole and so was his boss and refused to pick up the kids.  He was about an hour away, and it was 45 min to closing time at DC.  His boss scheduled a 7 pm call at 5 pm.  So I had to borrow a co=workers car to get the kids, call the DC that I would be late.  My H had to call triple A because they were mad I wasn't there.  Triple A had to deal with my co-worker instead of me.  Then I had to switch car seats drive a half hour to pick up the kids in my co-workers car drive a half hour back to work switch car seats to my car, go to Mcdonalds for dinner and drive a half hour back home and we got home at like 8:30 pm.  Meanwhile, DH's 7 pm call was canceled. 

That sounds terrible.

Agree.  So sorry.