Desperate for sleep advice!-UPDATE

NLJ82

My preemie was born 6 weeks early and it 6 weeks old (or corrected age, 2 days)

I am completely drained and exhausted. He will start getting fussy in the evenings and typically will scream and cry from 12am-8am. The only thing that will soothe him is his pacifier, however, after he falls back to sleep it falls out of his mouth and he resumes screaming, which means, I stay up ALL night and morning putting it back in his mouth over and over and over and over again.

I've tried letting him cry it out, doesn't work. I've tried holding and rocking him and it works, but the very second I lay him down...screaming. We give him gas drops and get good burps out of him after he's eaten so I wouldn't think it's gas?...but who knows. I change him when he's dirty or wet. Today I decided I'd try to go the day without giving him his paci, rather see if he could be soothed by his glow worm. This seemed to work, however the second it stopped playing music (It plays for about 8 minutes) he's back to screaming and crying. He doesn't show any signs of being sick and his temperature has been normal also.
He IS a very gassy baby (passing gas and burping constantly) but I'm not sure what else we could do to help with that. When leaving the NICU he was on a 3 hour schedule so I've tried to keep that, however with all of this crying I've been feeding him sooner and more ml per bottle. He seems to suck it right down....almost to the point that I'm afraid I'm overfeeding him. (only done this a couple of times)

WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?!

UPDATE- I realize this isn't really a "breaking news, update" situation lol, but I just wanted to add that after reading all of your awesome suggestions, I went out and purchased a noise/projector machine and some silicone pacifiers that are designed to not fall out of baby's mouth as easily. So far he's cried a couple of times but only for a few minutes and is seeming to rest pretty well. I did forget to mention (& some of you reminded me) that he DOES have reflux. He's not spitting as much and it's not gushing out of his nose as bad as when he was born but he spends a lot of time grunting, arching and stiffening his body. I assume all of that is still related to reflux? I'm a FTM and I'm LOST. I'll definitely mention the possibility of switching formulas also! Thank you guys!!

  

sweetbabyrahe

If he likes the glowarm, what about a sound machine (ours projects a scene on the ceiling also) that plays for a longer time

NLJ82

FhSTAR81 said:

Have you tried a swing so there's constant motion? I'd say if hes that upset something is bothering him. Hes very young to make him cry it out. Does he get gas drops or a sensitive type formula?

I've tried to put him in his swing and he seems to detest it. he screams the whole time he's in it
Also, he takes the regular similac advance. he was on similac neosure to help him gain weight but it also made him constipated (which was an whole other issue ) so it was switched to the regular similac and he's using the bathroom now, however it's very runny (sorry for the grossness). I was afraid it was diarrhea and didn't want him to get dehydrated if so so I called his pediatrician yesterday and never got a call back

sweetbabyrahe said:

If he likes the glowarm, what about a sound machine (ours projects a scene on the ceiling also) that plays for a longer time

I'd definitely try it! That never occurred to me but I'm desperate so...I'm on it!

Dumbgurl04

We just bought a white noise machine. It really seem like our DD liked to have some kind of back ground noise. We have had some rough nights with sleep also. Last night we feed her 4 oz and she slept for maybe 45 minutes then was up for 3 in half hours. Good luck I hope you find something that works. I might lurk to see what other advice you get

NLJ82

StacyMarie33 said:

I second the sound machine with a projection. Have you tried gripe water instead of gas drops? It helps with gas amongst other things. If a swing doesn't work have you also tried a bouncer? They usually have consultant vibrations and sometimes music also. If he is having runny poops a change in formula could help solve your issues. Could be as simple as trying a different brand, consult with your doctor first. If you do make a change do so gradually mixing the current formula with the new until you transition to the new.

We tried Gripe water, it was too thick for him to swallow and he would, again, scream and spit it all out.
His swing doubles as a bouncy seat with vibrations so after he seemed to hate the swing, I tried the boucer..nope! He wasn't having it.

I did call his doctor yesterday morning but never received a call back

I don't mean to discredit all f your suggestions, I appreciate them greatly! Could this be a colic situation? I've heard that nothing soothes a colic baby

jkrose10

What does your LO sleep in? The rock n play was a life saver for us. The problem then became transitioning to the crib. Honestly I was so sleep deprived, I didn't even care about transitions down the road. I needed sleep now!

jj0313

Our baby isn't here yet but we bought The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD in hopes it is helpful. They also showed several clips from this DVD in our newborn care class. Hang in there!!

lesliegolem

Oh I'm so sorry you're going through this! My daughter was extremely fussy and would barely sleep for months. What we found is that she had an egg and dairy allergy. I cut out all egg and dairy. Our Dr also put her on zantac because she thought she may have acid reflux. Cutting out the dairy though was the major thing. If she got any breast milk or formula with dairy she screamed all night and had runny poop. Of course talk to your Dr but you may want to try Nutrimigen (dairy free) formula see if that helps.

Also white noise maker is a must buy! It really helps all.of us sleep better.

Lastly it could be colic which sucks but will disappear over time. But I'd try changing formula or having him sleep at an angle (like with rock and play), white noise maker, etc. Good luck and hang in there!! This will pass and you're not alone.

mander82

Sorry I have no advice, just want to say that I hope things get better soon. I hope you guys can find a remedy soon. Hopefully your pediatrician can make some suggestions.
Hugs lady!!

ShelleyElla22

I also recommend a sound machine with a projector. My kids love them. I would also try having him sleep on an angle like in the Rock and play. Do you swaddle him? My 2 year old was a really fussy baby and I had to swaddle him really tight, shush him, and either sway or bounce him in my arms. I also downloaded a white noise app on my phone and held it right by his head which would help to calm him. He did end up getting put on reflux meds which helped and I took him to a chiropractor which was life changing! Good luck, I hope you can find something that helps!

Carebella

PP have offered lots of great advice and I really hope something works for you asap! One other idea to consider is a chiropractor that treats babies. If he has something out of line that could contribute to the gas and restlessness. Hugs mama!

Edit to add: Can DH or local friends and family provide some relief shifts for you? Or maybe hire a night nurse/doula so you can get some sleep until he starts sleeping better?

CarrieAnne09

I don't know much as I still have an inside baby. But I know my chiropractor specializes in adjustments on babies and has been very successful with helping reflux issues and colic. Not sure if that's something you'd ever consider but it might help.

MuchlyGen

Do you swaddle? My first son had a terrible time sleeping unless he was swaddled - especially considering that your little man was a preemie, it may be greatly soothing to him to be well wrapped. 

NLJ82

MuchlyGen said:

Do you swaddle? My first son had a terrible time sleeping unless he was swaddled - especially considering that your little man was a preemie, it may be greatly soothing to him to be well wrapped. 

Yes, ma'am! It used to work pretty well with him but doesn't seem to help a whole lot now, he just struggles to get his arms out and cries about it half the time lol.

NLJ82

mgg242 said:

I agree with trying to put him on an angle to sleep. We used this sleeper with DD Ahttps://m.target.com/p/fisher-price-newborn-rock-n-play-sleeper/-/A-15263603 Also maybe try newborn yoga https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hi3zJRz6U1w This baby colic song is strange but a mom on my other BMB suggested it and it worked wonders. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QQUjMtQRUbg Wishing LO calming and soothing dreams.

I've tried laying him on his back just to see how it works and...OF COURSE...he hates it, however, from the beginning (because of his reflux), he sleeps in a bassinet with and inclined mattress. Thank You!

kaimee27

I'm a FTM with an inside baby still, so my suggestions might not be the best, but I've listened to my sister talk about her kids (mom of 3), and see babies come through the ER where I work...the back arching sounds like pain to me.  If he's still getting formula out his nose, then I would definitely be talking to his doctor about his reflux (maybe trying some meds if he's not already on them), and colic/different formula.  It sounds like he eats a lot but then vomits it up if I'm reading this right?  If so, a few things come to mind.  Most likely it's just the reflux, but have you tried a different type of bottle?  Some work better for different babies than others at letting less air through from what I'm told.  If he's vomiting what seems to be most or all of his feedings up, and constantly seems hungry, maybe ask your doctor if he thinks some sort of bowel obstruction/stricture could be the issue-especially if he's not having normal bm's.  Again, I'm not a doctor, and don't even have an outside baby yet, these are just some of the things that I've seen addressed with my sister's kids/babies who come through where I work.

Hang in there mama!  T&P's that things improve for you soon!!

MrsDL

Hang in there mama -I know it's exhausting but it will pass.  With my first, I had such horrible anxiety from sleep deprivation and that feeling like you might never sleep again makes it worse.  I'm not sleeping with this one - one week in - but this time I know that it eventually ends.

You got great suggestions (I wouldn't leave the house without the little noise machine, I'd take it out of the lamb it was in and bring it with me), swaddling - the 4 Ss.  DS1 had pretty bad reflux, after trying everything my pedi put him on anti-reflux drops for a few weeks.  It helped and he outgrew it.  I wasn't keen on putting an infant on prescription medication but my pedi explained that if he was in pain and it would help, it was the direction to go.  We were glad to have done it because we did notice a huge difference (everything else didn't seem to do anything).

I didn't have this book with my first (now I wish I did), but I have some friends who highly recommended it so I just bought it.  After having read no less than 6 or 7 other books with DS1 AFTER we started to have sleep issues, I find this incorporates some of the logical things from the other books but is much easier to read and has some great (and important) tips to start things off so you don't end up with a difficult sleeper later on.  The Sleep Lady Good Night Sleep Tight.  I'm hoping it will produce one of these magical unicorn sleeping children my friends seem to have down the road.  It addresses pretty much everything - reflux, nursing, avoiding sleeping association crutches (our issue last time).   

meeshybee

This may have already been suggested, but have you tried elevating the head of his mattress? I suspect my LO has reflux and this is the one thing that has helped the most. I put a few blankets under the head of the mattress so that she sleeps at an angle and not flat.

That being said, I'm fighting the same battle. Some nights are better than others, but last night she didn't sleep anywhere but on me for more than 15 minutes. She finally crashed about 2:30am, a little over 2 hours before I had to get up with the kids. Of course, now she's out like a light and I have to take care of DD2.

ShelleyElla22

You might also want to discuss with the dr a change in his reflux meds. The first one they put my son on didn't work as well so they changed him to a different med which worked much better.