mil trouble

mgoldenchild

I'm having a lot of issues with my mil. Me and my baby and husband are living with my parents until we can get jobs. My mom helps me out a lot with my baby and is always taking pics and putting them on Facebook. This is her first grandchild and she's very proud to be a grandma and I don't think she's doing anything wrong. I went to see my in laws so they could see the baby and find out my mil thinks my mom is calling herself the "main" grandma and doesn't like all the pics my mom puts up on Facebook. She said that the posts sound teasing. I talked to my mom about it and she posted that my baby has lots of family that love her and no one should feel threatened by anyone. My mom had to delete that post becuz of comments my mil posted on it along with comments my mil had had put on several photos and posts. i don't feel my mom has done anything wrong and feel my mil is jealous becuz we aren't living with her. Am I wrong to think this? Is there anything I can do to get my mil to not be as jealous? I refuse to live with her because there are no jobs where she lives and I'm wanting to get an apartment by the first of the year. Her idea of living is all of us living together with me on TANF instead of working.

Weezy56

Both your mom and MIL are acting childish, so I would stay out of this. Refuse to engage your MIL when she talks about your mom and vice versa.

Why can't your mom just restrict your MIL from seeing certain posts? That's what she should have done instead of posting a passive aggressive comment towards her.

I would also have your husband speak with his mom about this if ignoring her does not work.

Friskypuppys

I would stay out of between them.  They are stirring the pot and using you as the go between. You have enough stresses without their squabbling. 

ashiscute

This isn't a MIL problem. This is two adults acting like kids problem. Personally, I would be uncomfortable if my mom posted pics of my child on Facebook like that. I'd tell her to cut back and stop being petty. Then I'd make an effort for your MIL to spend more time with your LO.

But mainly, get a job and get a place of your own.

bohemianlc

I don't think there was anything wrong with your mom posting photos initially (being that you were cool with it) and it was weird of your MIL to react so strongly, but I agree with PPs that your mom's status update sounds rather passive-aggressive. It sounds to me like both of them are being pretty immature with this whole Facebook thing!

Maybe you should just tell both your mother and your MIL that you aren't comfortable with them posting photos or status updates about your child online. You should be spending your time and energy taking care of your child instead of mediating their online squabbles, and perhaps that would help the situation. 

My husband and I have asked our parents not to post information about our child for privacy reasons, but doing so has also prevented my MIL, who definitely has a flair for the dramatic, from starting any quarrels or getting jealous.