Judge-worthy?

kelly321

This appeared on my FB feed a few days ago (male high school acquaintance posted it):

"Just watched a lady about to forget her child in back of her car. She was almost to the door at the grocery store then she stops turns around and gets him out of the car. Yep you realy needed to be a PARENT."

So would you judge? Honestly, I thought to myself - um, that could have been me!! And that lady was probably going- OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG all the way back to the car, right?

Would you judge this if you saw it happen?
Because the only comment he got was 12 likes and a "Pretty damn sad!!" which makes me think maybe I'm crazy and should be judging her?

SummerLove21

Parents Magazine did an article on forgetting your child in the car a couple of months ago. Essentially, it said that it happens more than we realize, and the people who forget are actually good parents who, in that moment, were overwhelmed, overtired, or just plain busy and a break in their routine led to forgetting the child in the car.

When I did my car seat check with DS, the woman there told me I would probably do it at some point, and to have a reminder in the car with me (like a stuffed animal in the front seat) so I would always see it and it would trigger my "there's a kid in the car" response.  I don't do that, but I am crazy paranoid and always check that I remembered to put DS in the car.  Truthfully, there are times when I'm driving and he's quiet that I do forget for a few minutes that I am not alone.  Thankfully, I've never actually forgotten him in there.

I think people who make comments like that clearly have never been parents.  I probably would have made the same comment before I had kids.  But I wouldn't judge that mom over it.

ericalee27

SummerLove21 said:

I think people who make comments like that clearly have never been parents.  I probably would have made the same comment before I had kids.  But I wouldn't judge that mom over it.

This was my first thought too......!

kelly321

True story: My mom (who I consider to be an awesome mother) once put my carseat on top of the car (with me in it) while she was doing something, then got in and started to back down the driveway!!! A neighbor saw and waved frantically at her to stop. Yikes. But seriously, if it can happen to my mom, it can happen to anyone. It really is those breaks in routines.

btw, I'm pretty sure this guy IS a parent, so he's got no excuse for judging.

singingsea

Parents make all kinds of stupid mistakes. Especially if for any reason you're low on sleep. I once forgot to buckle DS into the car seat. It has only happened once but I freaked the f out.

kleigh926

Nope, not judge worthy. I'm very much of the mindset that anyone is capable of just about anything given the right circumstances. I talked to DH about this a few months ago. He swore up and down that he would NEVER forget a child in the car, to the point of it being impossible for that to happen to him. Later he acknowledged that there was a slight chance it could happen.

I mean, God forbid it ever happen, but sometimes there is so much on my mind that I don't think this is above me or anyone else. Posts like this guy's really irritate me because they're so judgmental. People need to stop thinking they're better than others and would never do certain things.

tamarar5

I wouldn't judge the mom, but the guy who posted! If he saw her forget the kid, why didn't he sassy something!!!

Which one of us hasn't, at one time or another, been so exhausted that we think we've done something when we haven't? Ice never forgotten my kid on the car YET, but I'm fully aware that it could happen — which is why I put my wallet and phone behind my seat every time I get in the car, even if I have no kids.

fignewt74

Um, I left my purse in the Children's Place on Friday.  It was about 2 hours before I even noticed.  By the time I got back there to get it, the cashier was all judgy and said "I can't believe you walked out of here without it!"  I smiled and said "I remembered the most important thing...the baby!"

Poppy523

Absolutely could happen and not judge worthy! Since we moved, I rarely (actually not ever) go anywhere without at least one child so I am used to having to get someone out of the back, but I could still see it happening in a situation like Sagens friend so I always put my purse in the back now. DH, who is always driving around by himself, has admitted that he could see it happening to him easily if our routine changed because he is not in the habit of getting a kid out of the back.

cinnasugar

singingsea said:

Parents make all kinds of stupid mistakes. Especially if for any reason you're low on sleep. I once forgot to buckle DS into the car seat. It has only happened once but I freaked the f out.

I did this.  I was leaving the daycare parking lot and DD started laughing saying "DS is trying to get up!" and at that point I realized I hadn't buckled him in and he was, indeed, trying to get out of his seat.  And I did it once with DD when she was a little baby...got to daycare and realized I hadn't buckled the seatbelt.  

This makes me sound like a bad parent.  It was only the two times, I swear!

singingsea

cinnasugar said:

singingsea said:

Parents make all kinds of stupid mistakes. Especially if for any reason you're low on sleep. I once forgot to buckle DS into the car seat. It has only happened once but I freaked the f out.

I did this.  I was leaving the daycare parking lot and DD started laughing saying "DS is trying to get up!" and at that point I realized I hadn't buckled him in and he was, indeed, trying to get out of his seat.  And I did it once with DD when she was a little baby...got to daycare and realized I hadn't buckled the seatbelt.  

This makes me sound like a bad parent.  It was only the two times, I swear!

Hey my dad used to let me sit in his lap and steer while he worked the gas in the car. So what if we forgot to buckle in our kids a couple times

ericalee27

cinnasugar said:

singingsea said:

Parents make all kinds of stupid mistakes. Especially if for any reason you're low on sleep. I once forgot to buckle DS into the car seat. It has only happened once but I freaked the f out.

I did this.  I was leaving the daycare parking lot and DD started laughing saying "DS is trying to get up!" and at that point I realized I hadn't buckled him in and he was, indeed, trying to get out of his seat.  And I did it once with DD when she was a little baby...got to daycare and realized I hadn't buckled the seatbelt.  

This makes me sound like a bad parent.  It was only the two times, I swear!

Totally has happened here as well, including the older sibling informant "MOOOOOOOOOMMMM, Cole is not buckled in!!!!"  Oh boy....I'm so glad he told me!

SummerLove21

singingsea said:

Parents make all kinds of stupid mistakes. Especially if for any reason you're low on sleep. I once forgot to buckle DS into the car seat. It has only happened once but I freaked the f out.

I have totally done this. I took DS for a walk when he was a few months old. At that time, he would not sleep in his carseat during our walks if he was buckled in, so I didn't buckle him. He was still sleeping when we got home, so I decided to run a few errands. I put him in the car, went to two places (popped car seat in and out of stroller both times) and made it home before he woke up. I was so proud of myself until I realized he had been unbuckled the entire time. I thanked God right then we hadn't been in an accident.

Amstreagle

My first thought is this guy saw a mother accidentally leave a baby in the car and didn't say anything. Was he just going to let her keep going if she didn't realize it? Sorry but I think this guy sounds like a douche.