brining home all materials

CareBear0607

DD is in 1st grade.  She is very bright, but can be disorganized and a little "scatter-brained".  She has been having problems leaving things at school and not coming home with everything she needs.  She forgets her water bottle, coat, library books, and even homework.  I put a check-list in DD's take home folder and this hasn't seemed to fix the problem.  I have e-mailed with the teacher, trying to get to the root of the problem.  Is she being social at the end of the day and running out of time?  Is she not focused on the task of getting ready to go?  Is she "spacing out" and wasting time in any way?  Does she just need more time at the end of the day?  The teacher didn't respond to the "why" party of the e-mail, but said she would make sure that all she was at least coming home with all homework.  Then, yesterday, DD comes home without her math homework (after leaving her water bottle at school 3 days last week).  I am at the end of my rope.  Anyone have any ideas?  Parent/Teacher conferences are next week so I plan on bringing it up to the teacher then (face to face).  TIA for any help you can give me. 

CareBear0607

fredalina said:

This is pretty typical behavior for the age, honestly. Of course it could rise beyond typical (ADHD for example), but for a first grader it could just be that she's learning and doesn't quite have the executive function yet. Are there any consequences for leaving things at school? I don't mean punishment; I mean natural consequences. For example, once upon a time if a kid forgot their lunch, they would go hungry. Once or twice of that and they stopped forgetting their lunch. Now we are too quick to jump in and "save" them from the natural consequences by bringing them lunch or policies that provide free hot lunch for forgotten lunches, etc. What happens when she forgets her water bottle? Or forgets her homework?

I guess I am wondering if there is anything else I can do to help her learn this.

There are no natural consequences at school.  If she forgets her homework at school, she just brings it home the next day and does it then.  If she leaves her water bottle at school I do not send her with a new one until the original one comes back.  This slightly bothers her because then her water isn't cold.     

Getting ready for school she has to pack her own bag--making sure she has her lunch, snack, water bottle and homework.  All I have to say is "Get your bag ready for school" and she does.  Never has she left anything at home, it is always leaving things at school. 

I just want to make sure I am doing all that I can for her to learn the responsibility of bringing everything home.  Again this morning, we went over the check list and how to use it.  Fingers crossed she comes home with everything she needs. 

ppants

DS is in 3rd grade now.  Last year, he forgot/lost stuff all the time...lunchbag, water bottle, hooded sweatshirt x 3.  He and I put together a check list for arriving at school and leaving.  It was taped to his desk.  It did help some. 

Over the summer, DS was diagnosed with ADHD (inattentive) and began taking meds.  It's a HUGE change from last year.  He's only left his agenda at school twice and his water bottle and lunch bag make it home everyday.

janinekrause

I think it is pretty normal- my daughter definitely forgets her water bottle, and lost her glasses too. Fun times.

But personally, I would expect a little more from the teacher in terms of helping out. To say, ok, I will make sure she has her homework and not even follow through with that after a few days is weird to me.

My child would have more of a consequence from her teacher- she is fairly strict (but super nice)- if she kept forgetting her homework. That would stop her from forgetting.

I would talk to the teacher and ask for help- a note on her cubby with a checklist, etc. She should have some ideas since your child isn't the only one who is forgetful in first grade- trust me on that one.

She should also try and explain what happens at the end of the day. Most times they have clean up/get ready to go home, so that might help you understand more.

neverblushed

The end of the day can feel really hectic to a kid in primary grades, especially if she rides a bus and the bus is one of the first to be called.

In my kids' elementary school, the kindy kids were called to the bus before everyone else.  A 5th grade patrol got them at their classrooms and escorted each group to the bus.  It was practically impossible for a kindy kid to miss the bus in the afternoon.  When my son started first, he was worried about getting to the bus on time.  He's not generally forgetful with his stuff, but 1st grade was the time in his school career when he's had the most difficulty with leaving stuff at school.

My DD is naturally more scatterbrained.  She has some executive function weakness. Although she's gotten better through the years, she still forgets stuff pretty regularly.

I have found that reminding her she has more time than she thinks, natural consequences, and maturity were really the only things that made a difference.