18 month old clingy-ness? Also, being bitten.

CageyMack

Hi All!

Well, thought I'd throw this out to the general pool, since maybe some folks who aren't parents might still have insight from their nieces/nephews/friend's kids.

William has suddenly become incredibly clingy.  Whenever we are home he will grab my legs, holler, "up!" and not give up until he is on my hip.  I can put him on my back, which is what I'm doing.  He shows deep, deep favoritism for me, too, and won't take Mommy's help, only mine. In the morning he yells for me if Mommy comes to get him, and looks around her for me.  She isn't bothered by it, which is great, but does feel badly that she can't help him when he is in distress.

This clingy-ness is probably due in part to his starting full-time preschool, whereas he was doing part-time in-home care with a stay-at-home mom.  

At the new school he has also been bitten a lot, sometimes as much as 4 times in a week.  From what I understand, he is grabbing toys and not sharing, so the other kid (I think it might be just one), bites him.  I'm not upset so much as concerned about how we get William to stop stealing toys.

Any thoughts?  I know this is a lot, but I appreciate your thoughts on it.  TIA!

2brides

The preference for a parent/clinginess is very common. Gray was about this age when L was out late working one night and I was home with them. He screamed  for 3 hrs (starting when I was trying to put him to bed) until L walked in the door at 10pm. She picked him up and he was asleep on her shoulder in (literally) less than 2m. Infuriating. And then the stage where he would throw his sippy cup and if I picked it up, he would throw it again and scream. If L picked it up he left it alone and would smile at her. Grrrrr.

And re: sharing toys - it is just one of those things he will learn as it is modeled for him and he gets the hang of it. And while annoying (and sometimes scary) biting is very common at this age. They don't have the verbal tools to negotiate what they want, so they bite to get their point across.

This all will pass - and then it will be something else.

CageyMack

Thanks, 2brides!  I'm not really bothered by the biting, but it is really frustrating that he is so grabby (and hit-y, and smack-y). Nothing deters him!

I appreciate your insight, and the reminder that this, too, shall pass.

JGY

Well I've been pretty absent this week, but what better way to re-enter than to commiserate with my life-twin, @Cageymack?

Yup, yup, and yup.  Very clingy these days here in MN too, and the preference thing is still going strong.  It's hard for us, it does upset S and makes her frustrated.  And I feel pretty overwhelmed that I seem to be the only one that can comfort or settle Mr. G.  But I know it will pass.

There was about a month in time where G was being bitten 3-4 days out of 5 every week.  Like you, I was less worried about the biting and more concerned with his role in it.  And it was exactly the same thing that you're dealing with too.  And while I know G has not gotten any better about sharing, or at least not grabbing when another child has what he wants, the biter actually has improved.  Hopefully at the pre-school where Will is, they can give the biter some extra close attention and prevent the biting by jumping in sooner to help resolve the issues.

Good luck!  No advice, just good company in what you're going through. 

CageyMack

@JGY - Life-twin!  Awesome and true!  I was hoping you would chime in, and I'm glad to have some company in my "misery." 

@stringy813 - I think the school is watching pretty closely, it just happens quickly.  I'll see where it is in a week or so, and then I can always ask for more supervision, etc.  I feel like they are doing a pretty good measure of pro-active care; when they called me, they said they were talking with the biter's parents, and were working to stop the conflict with the children.  Whenever I've dropped in, there has always been very good supervision, so I am hopeful it is just a phase.  The care-provider appreciated that I've been reasonable about it, but reassured me that they are working to resolve it quickly, which makes me feel good.

Sheesh.  Babies.