How did you know..

DiFazette

When you're ready for #2? I just recently started getting the itch (after I got great news from my doc about my BP and other levels being in a good range consistently without meds).

I now know what I'm in for with another LO but I'm struggling with the finance part. 2 in daycare makes me question whether I'd work. How are you ladies planning to tackle 2 in daycare?

smg2302

I love babies so much that I find myself in a perpetual state of baby fever.  I knew we were ready because I wanted them 2ish years apart.  3 months before we started trying, we started making daycare, diaper and formula payments to ourselves to see if our budget could handle it, and it also stockpiled some nice savings for medical and nursery costs.  We are continuing to do so throughout the pregnancy.

We use an in home daycare center, so our 2 will  be in the same "class" and the cost is so much lower than a larger center.  The cost of 2 in daycare for one month is about the same as one of my paychecks, so staying home isn't really an option for us.

pnutg

We wanted our kids about 2 years apart, that's how we knew when to start trying. I would rather have them all little at once than spreading it out. I SAH, so daycare isn't an issue right now, but it could be if I decide/need to go back to work.

littlewest1

Honestly, we had a little scare in April.  I was 2 weeks late and thought for sure I was pregnant (we weren't trying).  After freaking out for about we week we decided that it wouldn't be such a bad thing to have them close in age.  Once my period finally came we were a little disappointed so we started trying about a month after that.

flyliceandcoffee

I agree with @beaubecca. For us, no matter the timing, we will have 2 in daycare, so we either figure it out and suck it up, or we don't have more than one. I knew I wanted to have 2 kids, so sure, our finances will be tight for a few years, but we'll figure it out. Yes, daycare is not cheap by any means and having two in daycare will be a very very costly expense. But you make it work by cutting out the frivolous spending, and you start saving months in advance so you have that buffer.

surpriseaddition

Although people usually focus on the finance issue of daycare, there are other costs that go along with kids too. Your children will be into the same things most of the time if they are closer in age, even if they are different sexes. Think about all the entertainment type things you'll be doing down the road (a family trip to Disney, the circus, etc.) If you're kids are really spread out, one child will be too young to enjoy it, when the other is prime age.  You'll end up doing those things for many more years, than if the kids are closer in age.  Also, fashions change, so with a larger gap, cost savings options like hand-me-downs may not work. Finally, a lot of colleges look at whether you have more than one kid in college to determine financial aid. I think there are financial benefits to having them closer in age, in addition to spreading them out. In my mind, it's a wash.  If you feel ready in your heart, go for it!  You never know how long it will take to conceive either.  I was pregnant with #1 after 2 months of trying, where #2 took a year.

huzzahuzza

I was in tears this weekend over this very same thing.  One in DC is draining us financially but J is just so perfect, how can we not have more?!?!

ETA: we're seeing a financial advisor this week to see if they can help us figure out what to cut and how to save.  

MAdams728

Same as Kate. I want them to be close in age, and being in my mid-30's, I didn't want to wait. I am pretty scared, though, I have to admit.

Boo0512

KateRN08 said:

I still don't know if I'm ready, but I know I wanted them close in age and figure we will be able to handle the short term craziness and sleep deprivation.

This and I want to be done having kids before I'm 30. Still waiting to test and I'm getting anxious.


ETA: when we have #2, they'll only be in daycare part-time so that won't be as difficult for us.

surpriseaddition

Boo0512 said

This and I want to be done having kids before I'm 30.

That made me smile! That was my motto when I had #2 at 30.....who knew I'd have #3 at 43!

pnutg

@Boo0512, I have always said done by 30 as well. I'll be 28 in a month. If I hurry, I might get 3...or be 31:)

jesselayne8

I SAH so daycare cost isn't an issue for us. I want my kids close in age. Having my first 2 17 months apart is awesome now (though the first 5 months were horrible). They are close enough in age that they have similar interests right now. I was hoping to have 2u2 again but it didn't work out. I do worry about having 2-3 kids in college at the same time but I will probably be back working full time by then.

LaxMOM44

We wanted them close in age and I wanted to get back to my career as soon as possible.

We reviewed our finances and talked about it a lot and then went for it.

tee18

Baby fever is a real thing, that's for sure!

Dh wanted them close, I was a little wishy washy. Then baby fever struck and here we are.

I sah so we don't have daycare costs, but medical bills and other baby "start up" costs are a big consideration for us.

I'm more nervous this time around w 2 but I keep telling myself thousands and thousands of families make it happen.

FmrAFBrat

My 2 are 19 months apart and if I hadn't miscarried I would have been 2U2 again with a 20 month gap. I'd love another LO, but after this last loss & complications I'm wondering if I should be happy with what I have. I had DS2 2 weeks before I turned 35....so age is another factor.

ecgal87

We have been TTA but my cycle is a week late and I'm getting BFNs, and now we are realizing we are sad about that.  When my nephews come over, my son gets beyond excited to play with them.  We feel like he needs a playmate.

I'll be scared no matter when it happens because the newborn days are just so hard with the exhaustion and sleep deprivation, and I worry about jealousy issues.  I SAH, so daycare cost isn't a factor, but our insurance costs are pretty high.  Something we have to consider.

Oh, and I haven't posted in like a year?  I lurk though.  Hello again!