Wow. Just when I thought things couldn't get weirder after seeing pictures of pee mixed with bleach, CM on toilet paper, or discussing cervix sweaters...
I literally busted a gut when OP said "I don't want a butt baby!" LOL OMG
Okay, the only way I can even imagine this being feasible is if your husband/SO was doing you in the hiney, got close to orgasm, then put it in the "wrong hole" and came. Then you really didn't get pregnant from butt sex, technically, you just didn't notice his dong slipped out and went somewhere else.
Um... congrats on your pregnancy?
And hi guise! I love lurking here for the insanity. The "Am I pregnant" threads always produce gold.
Oh my god. I am busy all weekend, take a nap yesterday afternoon to get rid of a horrible headache, and wake up to this last night. At first I thought I was still sleeping and having a bizarre dream. It's still here this morning, so... yikes.
OP, good luck in whatever you decide is right for you in terms of this pregnancy.
The rest of you pun-makers... high five. Hilarious.
No longer posting on The Bump due to the appalling misconduct of the staff and of its parent company, the XO Group. Four thousand active, engaged members do not represent "a few bad apples" and we are not trolls.
I was content lurking this thread but I now feel compelled to interject. Does anyone else remember the butt pregnant skit from SNL?! It's all I could think of reading the OP!
Wow. Just when I thought things couldn't get weirder after seeing pictures of pee mixed with bleach, CM on toilet paper, or discussing cervix sweaters...
I literally busted a gut when OP said "I don't want a butt baby!" LOL OMG
Okay, the only way I can even imagine this being feasible is if your husband/SO was doing you in the hiney, got close to orgasm, then put it in the "wrong hole" and came. Then you really didn't get pregnant from butt sex, technically, you just didn't notice his dong slipped out and went somewhere else.
Um... congrats on your pregnancy?
And hi guise! I love lurking here for the insanity. The "Am I pregnant" threads always produce gold.
@wishiwaspreggo- Hi stranger!! I miss seeing your posts around here! How are things going in "preggo" land????
Me: 28 H: 28 DS: 4
[TTC Since October 2013][ BFP 1.27.15 EDD: 10.8.15]
I WEAR ORANGE FOR MY GRANDMA- SUPPORT KIDNEY CANCER AWARENESS Trinitrotoluene: "My ears have been deflowered ....my mouth just hasn't been!"
The aftermath of a furious session of butt sex, butt babies are the resultant mix of shit and cum that is ejected from the recipient's asshole at their next dump.
Whether you're pregnant or not, please don't tell anyone it's a butt baby.
Another lurker here, I love this thread because I DID learn about this in health class! They tried to scare us with some statistics about anal sex leading to pregnancy. Congrats OP, your story makes my health teachers not complete liars. Though I still think this is MUD.
J'15 January Signature Challenge: Pinterest Fail: I want to do one, but I was late in starting and now I'm too lazy to get in on it. This is how most of my pinterest fails normally occur, at least I didnt buy supplies.
TTC since March 2014 BFP#1 09/25/2014 EDD 6/4/2015
I came lurking on a bump break to find this hot mess... Aside from all the gems that have been already said, no one has pointed out the fact that OP said that a week ago she had unprotected anal and then 5 days ago her period was due... so she had sex 2 days before her period was due and says this is when she got pregnant. Highly unlikely.
Lurking from A'15 because I got a PM from @Cythe about this thread
Thank you Cythe - this thread is awesome! I got no work done this morning while laughing my ass off at my desk while reading all 8 pages of awesomeness.
Re: Am I pregnant?
But after reading the whole thread,
Thanks for the laugh!
My Chart
no one caught her saying that the stick didn't have "flipping 'symbols' and crap"???
you guys are better than that.
#Bodymber14 #Bodygate #itsMillerTime
Bradley 05-04-11 & Tyler 06-18-13
Wow. Just when I thought things couldn't get weirder after seeing pictures of pee mixed with bleach, CM on toilet paper, or discussing cervix sweaters...
I literally busted a gut when OP said "I don't want a butt baby!" LOL OMG
Okay, the only way I can even imagine this being feasible is if your husband/SO was doing you in the hiney, got close to orgasm, then put it in the "wrong hole" and came. Then you really didn't get pregnant from butt sex, technically, you just didn't notice his dong slipped out and went somewhere else.
Um... congrats on your pregnancy?
And hi guise! I love lurking here for the insanity. The "Am I pregnant" threads always produce gold.
Oh, and Mysh was here.
Okay gotta go.
Married: 10/4/2013
TTC Since September 2014
BFP 11/30/2014 ~ EDD 8/13/2015 ~ CP 12/5/2014
BFP #2 12/30/2014 ~ EDD 9/13/2015 Stick bean stick!
What Are Your Thoughts on Tap Dancing Penguins?
Me: 28 H: 28 DS: 4
Trinitrotoluene: "My ears have been deflowered ....my mouth just hasn't been!"
I thought the term for this is Santorum.
@nikiz628 - hay gurl! Things are going swimmingly. Anatomy scan is tomorrow - woo!
If I knew butt sex would've gotten me knocked up faster I'd have saved myself a good deal of money and met someone in a back ally :P
H is intrigued about the butt sex conception.....he said if the need arises he would gladly assist in trying this new effective method with me! Lol!
Me: 28 H: 28 DS: 4
Trinitrotoluene: "My ears have been deflowered ....my mouth just hasn't been!"
TTC since March 2014
BFP#1 09/25/2014 EDD 6/4/2015
November Siggy Challenge: Selfie Fails
Hidden for the sake of your eyes!
I can always depend on TTGP for interesting reading when I'm just laying around.
***SIGGY WARNING***
Our Story
Me- 35, mild hypothyroidism
DH- 29, low count due to a chromosomal abnormality, only option is IVF/ICSI with PGD.
Married 5/13
TTC since 8/13
IVF/ICSI #1 ER 9/14 - 14R, 6M, 6F, 5 blasts off to PGD- 1 normal female, 2 balanced males
FET 12/8 of 2 frosties - 1 male/1 female - stick babies stick!
Beta #1 10dp5dt 444! Beta #2 14dp5dt 2,340! U/S 1/5-- TWINS!!! EDD 8/26/15
"You'll never see the rainbow if you can't survive the storm"
Aside from all the gems that have been already said, no one has pointed out the fact that OP said that a week ago she had unprotected anal and then 5 days ago her period was due... so she had sex 2 days before her period was due and says this is when she got pregnant. Highly unlikely.
TTC since April 2012
BFP #1, 10/03/2012 - EDD 6/15/2013 - MMC 11/15/2012 - D&C 01/04/2013
BFP #2, 04/06/2013 - EDD 12/17/2013 - MC 04/19/2013
6/12/2013 Diagnosed with Balanced Translocation (12 & 16)
IVF #1 with PGS: 10/2013: Canceled 9/27/2013 for issues with genetic lab
IVF #1.5 with PGS: 11/16/2013: Canceled. 11 eggs retrieved, 9 mature & 9 fertilized, all unhealthy embryos
IVF #2: 1/22/14: Canceled. 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 7 fertilized, all unhealthy embryos
IVF #3 with PGS: 5/10/2014: Switched to FET in July. 10 eggs retrieved, 9 mature, 8 fertilized, 2 healthy embryos!
FET #1: 7/31/2014: Transferred 2 nearly perfect (6AA, 6BA) healthy embryos- BFFN
Laproscopy: 10/2014: Healthy uterus
IVF #4: 12/8/2014: Canceled. 17 eggs retrieved, 15 mature, 10 fertilized, all unhealthy embryos
Everyone welcome on my posts
That creates triplets.
-----
Or possession by an ancient Egyptian cat god determined to take over the world
What Are Your Thoughts on Tap Dancing Penguins?
Lurking from A'15 because I got a PM from @Cythe about this thread
Thank you Cythe - this thread is awesome! I got no work done this morning while laughing my ass off at my desk while reading all 8 pages of awesomeness.
Me: 25, DH: 28, Baby #1 Due: April 30, 2015
Team BLUE!!