School frustrations, long...WDYT?

Spin313

Deleted; thanks for the comments.

neverblushed

I'm a writing teacher, and it would break my heart to tell a child, "use less detail," or "write shorter, less descriptive sentences."  A goal for younger writers is always to learn to streetttcccchhh their ideas.  That being said, another really important skill kids have to learn is how to work efficiently.  

Another thing to consider is that some kids would rather take work home and finish it up with a parent sitting beside them than do it in class.  For some kids, the threat, "if you don't finish in class, you'll have to do this for homework!" isn't a threat at all.  It's permission to relax and take their time during class, then do the work at their leisure later that night with the help of a parent. 

I'm not suggesting that your son is knowingly and intentionally goofing off or wasting time.  But it's possible that he doesn't realize that he's not working efficiently. I think if you decide to talk to the teacher, your first question might be, "Is my child on task and working effectively?"  The answer might surprise you.  My son is very well behaved in class... but he doesn't always work efficiently and he can get distracted, especially when he has to write.  If you start with that question, you'll be less likely to put the teacher on the defensive, and then you'll have more room to suggest that taking away recess might not be productive.

Spin313

@-auntie-‌ , my kid hates negative attention. He is sensitive and feels disappointed to show us the folder when it comes home. It is definitely not a play for attention. He also handles regular weekly work (workbook, spelling activities) without any assistance...but the homework folder has to be returned the next day so we need to rush through it a bit in order to get to soccer practice or other commitments.

@neverblushed‌ , is he a time waster? I'm not sure. I emailed the teacher last week and simply asked if she could give me feedback about class work. She said he's not focused and gets distracted easily. I'm just frustrated that the focus is on completion in a set amount of time, rather than effort...and I wonder if there have been any steps to teach the kids about time management and/or accomplishing classroom goals rather than taking away recess and making parents deal with the homework.

Kewii

I'm just confused as what you want the teacher to do. You don't want him to miss recess to complete work, and you don't want him to bring it home, and then--on top of a packed day where your son is already not having time to finish work--you want her to add in time management lessons.

So what is your solution here? I feel like the teacher is in a no-win situation here.

funchicken

At our school first graders are expected to work a lot more independently than kindergarteners. There's only one teacher in the classroom, whereas in kindie there was a teacher and an aide/volunteer. Maybe he's just having a harder time staying on task without the extra support.

Is he coming home with unfinished work every day? I can't remember if you mentioned it in the OP. If so, I would meet with the teacher to see if she has any suggestions.

neverblushed

Spin313 said:

 @neverblushed‌ , is he a time waster? I'm not sure. I emailed the teacher last week and simply asked if she could give me feedback about class work. She said he's not focused and gets distracted easily. I'm just frustrated that the focus is on completion in a set amount of time, rather than effort...and I wonder if there have been any steps to teach the kids about time management and/or accomplishing classroom goals rather than taking away recess and making parents deal with the homework.

I would be frustrated by that emphasis as well.  I think auntie's suggestion that he may not mind skipping recess is worth exploring.  

There are some things you can try at home to help him develop better time management and more efficient work practices:

--survey all the homework items together and make a written "to do" list.

--discuss what is involved in each task and talk through it, particularly the writing so that you can cue him if you think he's being overly ambitious.

--have him estimate how long it might take to do each task.

--time him and compare the actual time to his estimate.  If he's way off in one direction or another, discuss it.

--have him work on his homework sitting near you, but busy yourself with another task while he works so you aren't tempted to kibitz. 

--while you're involved in your work, keep an eye on him to observe how often he pauses while he's working.  Give him feedback after he finishes about whether he was working steadily or pausing a lot.

--let him form his own conclusions about whether he needs to work faster or not.  If he isn't bothered by spending a lot of time, right now, don't push him.

I'd also ask the teacher if she could experiment with different seats for him where he might be less prone to distraction.

HTH!