PR: DS saying "I'm scared" a lot

verticgm

DS will be 3 in January and lately has been saying he is scared of things. It is pretty random when he is scared of something. He told me yesterday he was afraid of scarecrows. My parents took him to a pumpkin patch this weekend so maybe he saw one there but I don't know why he would be scared of them. He told me today that he was scared of his sweater as I got him dressed this morning. I suspect he just wanted to wear his Halloween jammies to school.

I am thinking he is just learning and experimenting with emotions and a lot of big feelings at this developmental stage. We try to talk about what part is scary and that he is always safe with momma and daddy. We try not to dismiss his fears but I get the distinct feeling that there is some manipulation starting in trying to get out of things he doesn't want to do. I hope this doesn't sound harsh but, come on, kid...you aren't scared of the bath soap.

Any insight?

insertclevername

My kid is almost four. For the past year or so he has picked random things to be scared of.  Sometimes I think it is a stalling tactic, sometimes it is an attention getting tactic and sometimes I think he really is scared because he has encountered something new and unfamiliar.  I agree with MBK that it is a phase.  In your example of a scarecrow, I explain to him, "It is just straw and clothes.  There is nothing to be afraid of." 

verticgm

Thanks ladies for the advice. I definitely am starting to think it is more of a stalling technique. In case it isn't, we do try to be patient and explain the things behind the fears. I am glad to hear this isn't uncommon.

theseaword

DS is 2.5 and does this too. I think sometimes he is scared, but mostly I think he likes the cuddling/attention he gets when he says he's scared. Or sometimes I think he is looking for me to confirm or deny that something is scary.

MyMorningCoffee

My girls are always saying they are tired whenever they get upset, regardless of why they are upset. I think it's that they know they are unhappy for whatever reason, but they can't articulate the actual cause. I wonder if your son is trying to express a negative emotion, but uses "scared" for all of them.