Trouble TTC

Strange reactions

Last week I told a good friend of mine about my TTC troubles.  It kind of just came out in a wine induced, sleep deprived, teary way.  She's 48 and never had children (lifestyle thing, not an IF based decision) so I didn't expect anything beyond normal friendship caring, which she did.

But next time I saw her, she pulled me aside and was asking about how far I would go to try to conceive.  I (honestly) answered that I didn't know how "far" I would go because we're still figuring everything out, and that I would decide when we needed to.  She then proceeds to tell me I shouldn't go "too far" or start doing a lot to my body.  I'm not sure why she thinks her opinion on the matter would factor into what is a very personal decision.  

What is the strangest reaction you have gotten when sharing with others?

Re: Strange reactions

  • UGH! How rude! I'm sorry your friend acted that way. :(

    The worst reaction I had was from my best friend. She said, "Well, you're gonna stop trying after you're 35 though right? I hate it when people who can't have kids selfishly keep trying after it's safe to. The world does not need more kids with autism/downs/birth defects and that happens after 35." Needless to say, she and I aren't very close anymore. 
    That is incredibly ignorant.  Of your feelings and of science.  
    [Deleted User][Deleted User]mshandlebar[Deleted User]
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  • Rumbera28 said:
    The one that sticks in my mind the most is when some lady who I don't even know called and asked me "If I have any special news to share".    She was a part of my mother's "prayer circle" at her church, my mother spilled the beans and they had a special prayer for my fertility!!!    She had a 'special feeling' during prayer and was 'positive' that I was now pregnant.   And I wasn't.
    Lady, we stick ourselves with needles and allow stuff up our hoo-hah on a regular basis - don't you think we've already tried the prayer route too?
    emmuffy[Deleted User]jenmcD11
  • @DaydreamSam I had a woman at work say something similar to me right after I got married (at 29 years old).  She was being nosy and inappropriate to begin with and asked if we were going to have kids soon because did I "know that the chances of having a Down baby go up after 35" so I had better get started.

    Needless to say I try to avoid even polite chit chat with her these days.

    @Ann612 I'm sorry your friend was so hurtful.  I guess as someone who chose not have children she can't fathom the lengths we'd go to...or she's just rude!

    People can be so rude!

    Me: 31 (PCOS) possible right tube issues DH: 36 (SA normal) 
    Started dating in 2006, Married 2012 
    TTC since November 2013 
    First RE visit due to irregular periods: June 2014
    Lap/Hysto to remove polyps, cyst and tube blockage 11/6
    Cycle 1 (Dec. 2014) TI with Clomid, Trigger, & Progesterone CX due to no response
    Impatiently Waiting CD1 to try again with Fermara Back on the bench due to giant cyst,
    who know I'd ovulate on my own after a cancelled cycle and end up with a mega cyst :(
    All Welcome
     
    image
  • Ann612 said:
    @DarcyHermoine

    If there was a contest for "worst thing to say to someone having trouble TTC", your "friend" would win.  
    I agree, this one definitely takes the cake, oh my goodness!
    Me: 31 (PCOS) possible right tube issues DH: 36 (SA normal) 
    Started dating in 2006, Married 2012 
    TTC since November 2013 
    First RE visit due to irregular periods: June 2014
    Lap/Hysto to remove polyps, cyst and tube blockage 11/6
    Cycle 1 (Dec. 2014) TI with Clomid, Trigger, & Progesterone CX due to no response
    Impatiently Waiting CD1 to try again with Fermara Back on the bench due to giant cyst,
    who know I'd ovulate on my own after a cancelled cycle and end up with a mega cyst :(
    All Welcome
     
    image
    DarcyHermione
  • WTF is wrong with ppl!!!!!!!!!! Omgoodness!!!

    The worst thing for me was when my mom told me that she wanted to be our surrogate. Ummm..... there are so many things wrong with that... 

    :: Me: 30 ~ DH: 27 ::
       :: TTC since Oct 2013 ~ NTNP since Dec 2010 ::
    :: DX: PCOS Characteristics & MFI ::
    ~May 2014: 1st Consult with RE~
    ~SA #1/#2 (low on all #'s), HSG (found non-threatening uterine fibroid)~
    ~*1500mg Metformin Daily*~
    *June: Medicated Cycle #1: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN* 
    *July: Medicated Cycle #2: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
     *Aug: Medicated Cycle #3: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
    *Sept: IUI #1: 5mg Letrozole + Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI + Progesterone = BFN*
    Possibly Looking at IVF.. RE Suggested DH See a Urologist Before Moving On With Treatments 
    *Currently on a Break*
    ~*All Welcome*~
     

    image 

     ::: 3T November Siggy Challenge: Animals Being Jerks:::
    [Deleted User][Deleted User][Deleted User][Deleted User]
  • UGH! How rude! I'm sorry your friend acted that way. :(

    The worst reaction I had was from my best friend. She said, "Well, you're gonna stop trying after you're 35 though right? I hate it when people who can't have kids selfishly keep trying after it's safe to. The world does not need more kids with autism/downs/birth defects and that happens after 35." Needless to say, she and I aren't very close anymore. 
    Ugh. People are the worst.

    The worst reaction I got was from my "best" friend. I was talking about it and saying how scared I was since we are OOP and I didn't know how much we could afford. She replies with "well maybe God doesn't think you can afford a baby." I almost punched her.
    Un.freaking.believable. I cannot even with this shit. All the hugs and alcohol for you two.
    Love 2010 | Marriage 2011 | TTC #1 since 2012
    PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
    [Deleted User][Deleted User]DarcyHermione
  • I'm shocked at the comments I get when I tell pp I am having TTC. Like when I went for my pap a few weeks ago and got some weird unsolicited advice from my OB. I've regretted opening up to a few pp because of this. Sounds like a strange comment and also sounds like someone you need to not discuss your IF struggles with unless you want more strange and rude comments. Sorry, some pp just don't understand, I wish those pp would keep their opinions and thoughts to themselves. This is why we refuse to tell my husbands side of the family, they are full of stupid comments, I'm afraid I may hurt someone.


    TTC #1

    Me: AMA, DH: MFI

    Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis

    IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13 

    3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!

    ****All Welcome****

    imageimage



  • Wow. Just wow. These are some spectacular examples of stupidity and insensitivity. I am so sorry for everyone that has to put up with other people's verbal diarrhea.

    I've never really had a bad comment come my way, but at my brother's wedding, my aunt told my cousin that we were having difficulties. My cousin - who was 8 mos pregnant at the time - proceeded to chase me around the banquet hall because she was convinced that bumping her stomach into my stomach would make it  happen. I admit it, I ran as fast as I could from that crazy pants and her "baby bumping."
    ****SIGGY WARNING****

    image





    TTC since May 2013

    Me: 31, blocked tube
    DH: 35, azoospermia :(
    IUI #1 (50 mg Clomid, Ovidrel) on 9/7/2014: BFN
    IUI #2 (100 mg Clomid, Ovidrel) on 10/3/2014:
    BFN
    IUI #3 (100 mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Estradiol) on 11/1/2014: BFN
    First RE appt. on 11/11/2014
    November 2014: Benched due to cyst :(
    IUI #4 (5 mg Letrozole, Follistim, Ovidrel, Crinone) on 12/26/2014: BFP!!!
    Beta 1 (1/9/2015): 292     Beta 2 (1/12/2015): 843


    Ann612
  • ShaunteeShauntee member
    edited October 2014
    Unfortunately because it is still somewhat if a taboo topic people who haven't gone through it don't get it. I haven't gotten any bad reactions once I tell people, it is usually the comments I hear before people know we are dealing with IF. I do remember one lady who wasn't trying and had a surprise pregnancy told me that she was just going to tell people that they had been trying for 10 years to get pregnant. Yes, please use something that brings people heartache as a cover for a "surprise".


    @DarcyHermione‌ That made my heart hurt. I don't have any words for that one.
    Me-33 DH-36.
    Married 11/10 TTC 11/10
    06/11- diagnosed with PCOS 
    7/11- D&C and benched for a year 
    9/12-4/13-6 rounds of 50 mg Clomid- no sucess 
    6/13- new doc
    7/13-4/14- 6 more rounds of Clomid. 50 mg and then stepped up to 100mg- no success 
    5/14-7/14- took break waiting for new insurance 
    7/14-new insurance= new doc- actually a RE!!!! 
    7/14-HSG and blood test good-PCOS confirmed by new doc 
    10/14 looking forward to 1st IUI w/ Menopur. Blood Test= Negative
    11/14- IUI #2
    w/ Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    1/15- IUI # 3 w/
    Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    2/15- Self Benched this cycle
    3/15/15-Suprise BFP on natural cycle!!!! EDD-11/16/15

    DarcyHermione

  • LLM100811 said:
    @mshandlebar  WHAT??? WHAT??? Seriously like chased you?? Like roadrunner and coyote style??? I'm so sorry, that is just ridiculous! I wonder if you would have thrown a vodka tonic or something alcoholic on her if she would have melted and stopped chasing you??
    That is a fairly accurate description actually, although maybe more like roadrunner and peguin - she was too KU to move very fast. She eventually cornered me when we did family photos. I managed to angle awkwardly when she came at me, and all she got was my arm. For as strange as it was, I would  take this sort of reaction to some of the crappy things people have shared any day.
    ****SIGGY WARNING****

    image





    TTC since May 2013

    Me: 31, blocked tube
    DH: 35, azoospermia :(
    IUI #1 (50 mg Clomid, Ovidrel) on 9/7/2014: BFN
    IUI #2 (100 mg Clomid, Ovidrel) on 10/3/2014:
    BFN
    IUI #3 (100 mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Estradiol) on 11/1/2014: BFN
    First RE appt. on 11/11/2014
    November 2014: Benched due to cyst :(
    IUI #4 (5 mg Letrozole, Follistim, Ovidrel, Crinone) on 12/26/2014: BFP!!!
    Beta 1 (1/9/2015): 292     Beta 2 (1/12/2015): 843


    emmuffy[Deleted User][Deleted User]

  • LLM100811 said:
    @mshandlebar  WHAT??? WHAT??? Seriously like chased you?? Like roadrunner and coyote style??? I'm so sorry, that is just ridiculous! I wonder if you would have thrown a vodka tonic or something alcoholic on her if she would have melted and stopped chasing you??
    That is a fairly accurate description actually, although maybe more like roadrunner and peguin - she was too KU to move very fast. She eventually cornered me when we did family photos. I managed to angle awkwardly when she came at me, and all she got was my arm. For as strange as it was, I would  take this sort of reaction to some of the crappy things people have shared any day.

    I'm Sorry, I got a good laugh out of this. Some pp are serious wackado's.


    TTC #1

    Me: AMA, DH: MFI

    Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis

    IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13 

    3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!

    ****All Welcome****

    imageimage



    mshandlebar
  • I was told by a coworker that I needed to be more maternal before I could have a baby. Ummm we work with adults, how can she judge how maternal I am? Also, I'm pretty sure I've been super maternal since I was in the 6th grade begging my aunt and uncle to go out so I could babysit.
    Me: 26, PCOS, Clear HSG
    DH: 29, Perfectly Normal SA

    Married Since 10/6/2012
    TTC Since 6/2013

    2/2014: Visited OB-GYN, Low Progesterone
    3/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
    4/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
    5/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
    6/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN

    7/2014: First RE visit, Diagnosed with PCOS, Started on 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + TI, 1 22mm Follicle, BFN
    8/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + TI, 2 Mature Follicles, BFN
    9/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #1, 3 Mature Follicles, BFN
    10/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #2, 1 Mature Follicle, BFN
    11/2014: 5 mg Femara + 75 mg Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI #3, 3 Mature Follicles, BFN
    12/2014: Starting IVF in January

    1/2015: IVF with ICSI, Currently Stimming

    *****Everyone is Welcome*****

    Shauntee
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