First child

Eliannisc

Is labor really as bad as some women say ? I been trying to watch some videos and it freaks me out.

MuchlyGen

Both my labors were pretty great. They were hard and sometimes painful work, but wonderful experiences. 

Mama-Bear

Yep, it's pretty bad honestly.  It starts out not too terrible but it doesn't stay mild the whole time.  Can you do it, of course, having an epidural wasn't always an option.  Will you want an epidural when the time comes, maybe, that's only for you to decide.  My advice for everyone would be to go in with a plan but keep an open mind.  I would love to avoid an epidural next time and plan on doing hypnobabies to help me through the pain, but at the end of the day, if I end up with an epidural or another c/s, that's ok too.  I would love to have that "badass" feeling for going without pain meds, but it doesn't make the baby any less of a miracle.  

JCWhitey

I actually really enjoyed labor, which sounds crazy, but it was like being in the middle of the craziest experience of my life.  And it's painful but not in the same way as breaking your arm or whatever.  It's a much different experience than that.  But every woman and delivery is different.  Your best bet is to learn as many pain management tricks you can and read birth stories from "Birth Without Fear".   I love that blog.

MsMacual

I think it depends on a lot of factors, most of which aren't in your control.  I didn't find it particularly painful, but the crazy pressure was tough for me to get through.  I think the biggest factor is how well you are mentally prepared to keep an open and positive mind.  That alone will make it easier to get through without pain meds.

NoeliaV

Was it intense? Yes.

Was it painful? At times, yes.

Was it unmanageable? No.

I said "I can't" exactly once, which in hindsight was the very end of transition. The contractions, even at their most intense, are intermittent, so I was actually sleeping in between them. (I labored in the hospital from around 11:30pm to around 4am, so it was my sleeping time, lol!).

You can do it, if you want. I also recommend Ina May's book, and Penny Simpkin's The Birth Partner, and some sort of preparation classes.

leela02

MsMacual said:

I think it depends on a lot of factors, most of which aren't in your control.

This. Mental preparedness is really the thing that you can control the most. Read recommended books, take a birthing class, learn some coping techniques, take a tour of the hospital/birthing center (if you're not having a home birth) & get familiar with their policies, and talk with your OB/midwife if you have any questions about what to expect from them.

I know a mom who had all her babies med-free and played cards with her DH in between contractions the whole time. They nurses thought they were crazy lol. For her the time between contractions was enough to keep the pain manageable.

I know another mom who asked for an epidural after being in labor for almost 24hrs with no sleep. She couldn't fall asleep at any point due to pain from the contractions. The epi let her take a nap. At some point afterward her labor stopped and she ended up getting pitocin to continue. Not the experience she expected but she stayed positive & the rest she got after getting the epi was worth it.

amieeyoung

I think it depends on many factors especially differences between individuals, reg. labor vs. back labor, length of labor etc. 

stephl3055

Mine might be skewed because I was induced with Pitocin (after cervidil), but mine was completely manageable (and I've heard how bad Pitocin contractions can be).  From the start of pitocin to the birth, it was about 10.5-11 hours which went by so fast.  Pushing only lasted about 45 minutes.  I don't know if the "ease" of my birth was because of the Pitocin or in spite of it.  It just seemed like I progressed really quickly and things went well for me.  

I only said "I can't do this" once and that was when my doula went to the bathroom.  She came back and I had my game face back on.    I didn't even realize I was in transition either.  I started getting queasy and thinking the contractions were getting really tough to manage, but it never occurred to me that I was nearing the end, until after she was born and I had time to replay what happened in my head.  

JCWhitey

For me I was expecting labor to go a certain way.  I read too many books.  Haha! I was expected to experience some pain/discomfort during a contraction but that it would go away and I'd get a few minutes of normality to recompose and prepare for the next one.

I didn't get that.   When my contractions started I had two that were about five minutes apart and then BAM!  1 minute long, 1 minute and 20 seconds apart which means I literally had 20 seconds between contractions.  It's not that they were painful, I never really experience truly painful contractions, but it was constant and I never got the break.  BUT, even without a break I still went through labor with zero pain meds and zero interventions.  I confess that I asked for an epidural because I got stuck during transition.  I went from 4 to 9 cm in an hour and a half and then sat at 9 for almost an hour being told I had the fight the urge to push.  That was so hard because I was literally fighting every natural instinct I had, and it's when you take that natural "primal" urge away that labor starts to suck.   I think if you are allowed do go, do, and say what you want it goes better.  Your body knows what to do and your instincts will help guide you there.

Once I got to start pushing I was in Heaven.  I was literally shaking from the hormone surges and ability to control what was happening.  My husband was concerned by that but I kept telling him it was a good thing, I felt amazing.   And the moment my son was born I looked at my husband and said "that was awesome, can I do it again?".  Haha!  

So yeah, everyone is different!  Read all the stories you want but ONLY to find tools and tricks to keep in your memory to help you.  I think I went into 50 different positions and tried a dozen different ideas for focus and breathing during my five hour labor.  Something would get uncomfortable and I'd remember my client told me she hummed so her whole body vibrated, so I tried that.  Then I remembered my friend telling me she laid back on her birthing ball and that felt great, so I did that.  Then when that wasn't cutting it I remembered reading in a birth story how sitting on the toilet felt amazing, so I sat on the toilet.  The more tricks you have the better!  For some one little trick is all you need.  For me everything did work, but only for a few contractions and then I wanted to move on to the next thing.

And yes, I cannot WAIT for my next delivery.  First time around it was always a bit daunting and scary but now I kind of know what I can maybe expect and I'm excited for it.

soulcupcake

My births have all been very, very easy, but I don't have "typical" labors/births, so I don't represent the norm. Contractions were very manageable, but the pressure associated with their descent and eventual birth, very intense. My longest labor, my first, was 3 hours, and I pushed a few times and she was born. And I was expecting a second stage lasting 1-2+ hours, especially with her being LGA (9 lbs at 38 weeks). I started labor in transition with her, which was soon accompanied with pressure as she began descending, and that was intense because I wasn't expecting that feeling so soon after starting labor. Contractions (pitocin induced) were like moderate menstrual cramps. 

After she was born I thought "THAT was it!?" I just thought I got lucky, until my second daughter's birth, in which case my "labor" was all of 47 minutes and my body heaved her out. I realized that that's just how my body does it. And with her contractions were more like a wave of tightening, but not super painful. But it was so short lived. The trend of "easy" births continued. 

My uterus decided to skip the "labor" portion with my 4th and instead heave him out in four back to back contractions leading to a spontaneous and abrupt birth. Crazy.