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IF article

l0v3l0v3 member
edited October 2014 in Trouble TTC
Just an IF article I liked and thought I'd share. Hope the link works.

https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/4595151

"Hope.
False alarm.
Hope.
Discouragement.
Hope.
Frustration.
Hope.
Shame.
Hope.
Despair."

So true.
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Re: IF article

  • BunnyBerryBunnyBerry member
    Thank you for sharing this article! It has a beautiful though sad message and encouraged me tonight. :)
    January 3T Siggy Challenge - New Year's Resolutions
    image
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    Me (29), DH (30) TTC actively 54 55+ cycles | All BFNs
    MFI (low everything) | Endo Stage 1 & Stenotic Cervix (treated) | PCO
    Married - July 2008 | Started TTC - Jan 2009 | RE Visit #1 - Mar 2014 
    IUI #1 ICI #1 - June | IUI #1.1 Laparoscopy - Aug
    IUIs #1.2, 2, 3 - Sept, Oct, Nov (Letrozole) - BFNs 
    IUI #4 - Dec (Bravelle) | IUI #5 - Dec/Jan (Bravelle) - 5 follies + TI - BFNs
    IUI #5.1 - Jan (Bravelle) Cancelled 
    Planning to start IVF in March!
    ***All Welcome***
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  • theholmanherdtheholmanherd member
    Thank you. I really wish I could share it on FB, but we aren't "out" to the general public yet. It was so spot on.
    Love 2010 | Marriage 2011 | TTC #1 since 2012
    PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
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  • mmmKayymmmKayy member
    I love this article. Like @theholmanherd‌ I wish I could share it but we aren't out either.
    :: Me: 30 ~ DH: 27 ::
       :: TTC since Oct 2013 ~ NTNP since Dec 2010 ::
    :: DX: PCOS Characteristics & MFI ::
    ~May 2014: 1st Consult with RE~
    ~SA #1/#2 (low on all #'s), HSG (found non-threatening uterine fibroid)~
    ~*1500mg Metformin Daily*~
    *June: Medicated Cycle #1: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN* 
    *July: Medicated Cycle #2: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
     *Aug: Medicated Cycle #3: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
    *Sept: IUI #1: 5mg Letrozole + Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI + Progesterone = BFN*
    Possibly Looking at IVF.. RE Suggested DH See a Urologist Before Moving On With Treatments 
    *Currently on a Break*
    ~*All Welcome*~
     

    image 

     ::: 3T November Siggy Challenge: Animals Being Jerks:::
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  • BandM14BandM14 member
    Thank you for sharing this. @theholmanherd‌ and @mmmKayy‌ we are not "out" yet publicly either... Just our parents and close friends know. Sometimes I feel guilty, because I wonder if there are others out there who are going through this in silence and feeling alone, and I wonder if sharing our story publicly would help. But I guess I'm just not ready yet.

    Me: 27 DH: 35

    TTC #1 Since July 2013

    Started RE Testing July 2014

    2 HSG tests: Right tube is blocked, possible endo.

    TSH elevated, started Synthroid 25 mg daily.

    October, 2014: Femara 5 mg + TI ---> 3 follies on blocked tube side ---> BFN

    November, 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI#1--2 follies (on the good side), 46 mil. motile sperm=BFN

    Nov-Dec 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #2 (1 follie, 76 mil. motile sperm) + Endometrin=BFN

    January, 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #3 (1 follie, 38 mil. motile sperm)=???

    New RE appt. scheduled for 1/14.


    3T January Siggy Challenge: New Years Resolutions

    Mine: Lose the weight I put on from booze and cookies over Christmas.

    image


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  • Chasity08Chasity08 member
    I read this article last night as well with my DH. It is beautifully written.

    ***Signature/Ticker Warning***

    March 2008 - DD born - no issues conceiving (surprise). Limited issues during pregnancy/delivery.
    June 2011 - Married DH.
    June 2013 - Diagnosis of Endometriosis and PCOS (approximate).
    December 2013 - First cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
    January 2014 - 2nd Cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
    February 2014 - 3rd Cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
    March 2014 - Took month off to prep for surgery
    April 2014 - Laporoscopy for endo. Unable to remove endo due to too close of proximity to ureter. HSG done as well. Fillopian tubes open.
    May 2014 - 1st round of Femara. Positive OPK. BFN.
    June 2014 - 2nd round of Femara. Moved to RE to have CD10 Follicular U/S. No Follies in left ovary. 5 follies in right. Largest follie 8mm, 1 7mm, 2 3mm, 1 2mm. Positive OPK on day of U/S. BFN. DH has SA done at this time - All results within normal limits.
    July 2014 - 3rd round of Femara. CD10 Follicular U/S. No follies in left ovary. 7 follies in right. 1 20mm, 1 12mm, 1 10mm, 4 <5mm. Scheduled for IUI. Canceled due to low estrogen level of 145. TI this month. Prepping for Injectables next month. BFN.
    August 2014 - CD3 BW Normal. Injectables not happening because of stupid miscommunication about "required injectables class." Taking class this month. No medication. TI for the month. SIS scheduled for 8/7/14. SIS results - "I have a beautiful uterus." Huzzah!
    September 2014 - Cycle cancelled due to stupid AF coming early and making my IUI run in to DH's business trip. Try again next month.
    October 2014 - Injects with IUI cycle. 75U 5 days. Estrogen at 36. Bumped up to 125 for 4 days. Estrogen 105. Bumped up to 225. Ganirelix for 2 days. 4 mature follies. Triggered 10/9. IUI 10/10.
    BFP 10/24/2014. Beta #1 - 178   Beta #2 - 398.   U/S 11/7/14- TWINS!!!!

    image

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     Pregnancy Ticker

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  • mmmKayymmmKayy member
    @BandM14‌ We are the same.. My mom knows, and our few close friends. I'm totally ok with going publicly with it, it's MH that's not. Our IF is mainly linked to his "fellas" and like most men, that is a really sensitive subject for him. So I doubt we'll ever come out during our struggle.
    :: Me: 30 ~ DH: 27 ::
       :: TTC since Oct 2013 ~ NTNP since Dec 2010 ::
    :: DX: PCOS Characteristics & MFI ::
    ~May 2014: 1st Consult with RE~
    ~SA #1/#2 (low on all #'s), HSG (found non-threatening uterine fibroid)~
    ~*1500mg Metformin Daily*~
    *June: Medicated Cycle #1: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN* 
    *July: Medicated Cycle #2: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
     *Aug: Medicated Cycle #3: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
    *Sept: IUI #1: 5mg Letrozole + Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI + Progesterone = BFN*
    Possibly Looking at IVF.. RE Suggested DH See a Urologist Before Moving On With Treatments 
    *Currently on a Break*
    ~*All Welcome*~
     

    image 

     ::: 3T November Siggy Challenge: Animals Being Jerks:::
    Report Reply
  • LindseyM2012LindseyM2012 member
    Thank you for sharing this. I get so wrapped up in my own grief that I don't always think how this affects my husband. He is so emotionally level that he seems so unaffected. He is away until tomorrow (I had to bail on an overnight trip because of bad IF days and major headaches from my meds) and I might just ask him if he is feeling anything about my IF. His response will probably be "No...its all good baby. We'll get through this." But in the off chance he does want to talk about something, the channel will be open.

    Me: 28  MH:35

    Married September 2012. TTC since September 2013

    June 2014 - Dx w/ significant PCOS and referred to RE.

    July/August 2014 - Testing complete: Testosterone & AMH very high, FSH slightly high, Vitamin D low, tubes and lining all lovely. DH SA: A+

    Cycle 1 (Nov 2014): 2.5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI = BFN

    Cycle 2 (Dec 2014): 5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN

    Cycle 3 (Jan 2015): 5mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN

    WTF consult scheduled for 1/29

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  • mmmKayymmmKayy member
    @LindseyM2012‌ Sounds like MH.. But he adds in there "I have faith that God is in control".
    :: Me: 30 ~ DH: 27 ::
       :: TTC since Oct 2013 ~ NTNP since Dec 2010 ::
    :: DX: PCOS Characteristics & MFI ::
    ~May 2014: 1st Consult with RE~
    ~SA #1/#2 (low on all #'s), HSG (found non-threatening uterine fibroid)~
    ~*1500mg Metformin Daily*~
    *June: Medicated Cycle #1: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN* 
    *July: Medicated Cycle #2: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
     *Aug: Medicated Cycle #3: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger + TI + Progesterone = BFN*
    *Sept: IUI #1: 5mg Letrozole + Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI + Progesterone = BFN*
    Possibly Looking at IVF.. RE Suggested DH See a Urologist Before Moving On With Treatments 
    *Currently on a Break*
    ~*All Welcome*~
     

    image 

     ::: 3T November Siggy Challenge: Animals Being Jerks:::
    Report Reply
  • ShaunteeShauntee member
    Thank you so much for sharing. It is comforting to know we are not the only ones going through this. Also, it is reassuring to remember that is isn't something we did wrong that causes this.
    Me-33 DH-36.
    Married 11/10 TTC 11/10
    06/11- diagnosed with PCOS 
    7/11- D&C and benched for a year 
    9/12-4/13-6 rounds of 50 mg Clomid- no sucess 
    6/13- new doc
    7/13-4/14- 6 more rounds of Clomid. 50 mg and then stepped up to 100mg- no success 
    5/14-7/14- took break waiting for new insurance 
    7/14-new insurance= new doc- actually a RE!!!! 
    7/14-HSG and blood test good-PCOS confirmed by new doc 
    10/14 looking forward to 1st IUI w/ Menopur. Blood Test= Negative
    11/14- IUI #2     w/ Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    1/15- IUI # 3 w/     Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    2/15- Self Benched this cycle
    3/15/15-Suprise BFP on natural cycle!!!! EDD-11/16/15

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  • Ann612Ann612 member
    thanks for sharing.  I could do without the Bible passages but a lot of it hit home...

    "...she was the one scheduling the monthly ultrasounds. She was the one taking medications. She was the one physically being reminded every 28 days of the failure to conceive. "

    I'm impressed that he captured both sides (him and his wife) so well.  
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  • Chartm05Chartm05 member
    ****OPP Mentioned**** Great article. My BIL and his wife just recently had a little girl through IVF after trying for three years, so when DH and I found out everything that was going on with us we naturally turned to them for support. BILs wife mailed me a copy of the book Hannah's Hope by Jennifer Saake. I definitely recommend it. Granted, I can't get through a whole page without crying, but still good. If you're not "religious" or if the Bible just straight up offends you, it might not be for you, which is fine, but worth a look into at the very least. It touches on many of the same things this article does, just more in depth. Thanks @l0v3‌ for sharing.
    Me: 24 | DH: 25
    Married: May 2013
    TTC: Since Sept. 2013
    Me: unusually short cycles, anovulation, possible tubal issue on right side
    DH: Azoospermia, likely not blockage, just doesn't produce any
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  • yepitsme215yepitsme215 member
    This is awesome, thank you. 
    Me: 24 
    DH:25
    TTC for over a year with PCOS. We'll see what happens. 
    November 3 2014-finally going to see an RE!

    image
    Favorite villain: Alex from A Clockwork Orange
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  • DharmaChickDharmaChick member
    Great article, thanks for sharing.  It helps to hear this from the man's perspective.
    ________
    ME: 34, Atypical PCOS (lean, no O without meds) + unexplained; DH: 33, mildly low motility
    09/2012: Start TTC after stopping NuvaRing.  No cycles seemed to occur.
    01/2013 - 05/2013: Tried Provera to "jumpstart" cycles. No luck.
    12/2013-     01/2014: Clomid 50mg - no big follies, stepped to 100mg; One mature follie, Ovidrel (HCG trigger), IUI #1 completed - BFN
    02/2014: Clomid 100mg;     One mature follie, Ovidrel trigger, IUI #2 completed, Crinone - BFN
    03/2014: Clomid 100mg -     no big follies on 1st round, 2nd round prescribed; One mature follie, Ovidrel, IUI #3 completed, Crinone - BFN
    04/2014-05/2014: Letrozole 5mg + Ovidrel HG to prep for IUI #4 switched to TI, Crinone - BFN
    05/2014-06/2014: Letrozole 5mg; one mature follie,     Ovidrel, IUI #4.1 completed, Crinone - BFN
    07/2014-08/2014: Letrozole 5mg; one mature follie,     Ovidrel, IUI #5 completed, Crinone - BFN
    09/2014-10/2014: IVF Prep - Insurance requires IUI #6;     Letrozole 5mg - no big follies 1st round, 2nd round prescribed; IUI #6, Crinone - BFN
    11/2014: "Break" - Letrozole 5mg to cycle before prepping for IVF - successfully O'ed, but BFN
    12/2014: Extending 'break' one more Letrozole-only TI cycle for mental health break - BFN
    01/2015-    02/2015: Prep for IVF - BCP then Gonal-F, Ganirelex, Novarel trigger;  ER scheduled 2/11!
    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/4cf919
    PAIF/SAIF Welcome.
    December 3T Siggy Challenge: Favorite Holiday Movie
    image
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  • TTCBabyJTTCBabyJ member
    This was a really great article...thank u for sharing.
    Me: +35 DH: +35
    TTC: Since January 2013 
    DX: PCOS. Severe Endometriosis, Unicornuate Uterus w/only left tube and left ovary, Pedunculated fibroid (on the outside of uterus) and Anovulation. All conditions diagnosed 8/13
    TX: Metformin
    DH DX: MFI - low morphology, low motility
    Ultrasound shows both kidneys in spite of UU. 
    HSG showed clear tube on the left side. 
    Lap Surgery performed 1/9/14 to remove fibroid and endo (Stage 3)
    • IUI# 1 June 2014 started 100 mg of Clomid - 7dpiui Progesterone: 13: BFN
    • IUI#2  July 2014 started 100 mg of Clomid - 7dpiui Progesterone: 5.75: BFN
    • Natural Cycle - so shocked to be in 2WW - 7dpo Progesterone: 15.5: BFN
    • Working with new RE starting injectables in late August.
    • IUI #3 August 2014  w/ Menopur: BFN
    • Finally ovulating on my own!!
    Waiting to start IVF hopefully
    **********All Are Welcome**************
    3T January Siggy Challenge: New Year's Resolution
    image

     
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  • dominicandreamerdominicandreamer member
    Thank you for posting this.  There were a quite a few points I could relate to growing up in the church.  
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  • l0v3l0v3 member
    I wish I was brave enough to share this on facebook as well. Most of our family and friends know we're struggling with IF and so do some coworkers, but for some reason I just can't bring myself to do it. I'm really glad you all enjoyed this as much as I did. 

    @Chartm05 I'll look into that book. Thanks for the rec!
    Report Reply
  • angelattc1angelattc1 member
    Wonderful article. Thank you for sharing it. All the times I have tried to explain how I feel...this captures it perfectly 

    "The grieving brought on by infertility is different from other grief I have experienced because you do not grieve what was lost, but what never was. At some point, you start grieving for what never will be."
    Me {29} DH {31} ~ TTC #1 Since August 2009 with PCOS
    November 2010 - PCOS DX
    2011-2013 Metformin and NTNP
    July 2013 - Started 3 rounds of low dose Clomid - No O
    September 2014 - Started Pregnitude and Metformin
    January 2015 - New insurance

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  • SND1231SND1231 member
    First of all... Amazing article and so accurate. Thank you for sharing! I am so glad I read some of the comments as well. My husband and I are not "out" yet either as I just can't say the words out loud yet. I felt just like this article... But talking on here has helped me soo much. Reading everyone's posts and being able to be honest with my feelings is slowing helping me accept the situation. So thank you to you all!
    Married: 12/15/2012    TTC: 08/2014
    Husband: 26 SA: normal
    Me: 23 Low AMH and damaged ovaries due to chemotherapy.
    No AF or O in 3 years. HSG showed a slight T shaped uterus.

    High Risk OB 9/29- got the ok to get pregnant.
    RE Appt:  10/28/ U/S showed follicles, but also small damaged ovaries.
    B/W results CD0: all normal except low AMH at 1.3
    Cycle 1-November (TI)- Femera 2.5mg, 2mg Estradoil, and Trigger=BFN
    Cycle 2-December (TI)- Femera 2.5 mg ,4mg Estradoil, and Trigger= No O
    Cycle 3-January (TI)- Femera 5 mg, 2mg Estra    doil, and Trigger=


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