So M15 has rules? Lurkers reveal yourselves/newbie playdate!

chaysefaith

Apparently we have a reputation as being some serious assholes with serious rules.

I'm declaring this a truly flame free/rule free thread.

So, lurkers, why you lurkin'? Do you not have enough time to keep up? Are you intimidated? Are you waiting to pass a milestone? Do you feel like you don't have anything to contribute?

Newbies, do you have questions you're scared to ask? Ask them here, flame free.

Regs- everyone is in second tri now, I know I'm not the only one frustrated with what appears to be an overwhelming amount of random driveby's still. This is my effort to bridge the gap. Feel free to contribute and ask/answer questions but let's leave the pitch forks for other threads

bwftw

Posting a ton just is NMS. I'm the same way on fb. I post if I think I actually have something of value to contribute.

littlepawsbigears

I don't post much because typically I can find answers to any questions by doing a search. I can get on my mobile app for about a half an hour everyday, so I miss a lot of the random thread action. It seems like women really get to know each other on those.

Zanza_3

I don't post often as I feel I don't have much to contribute. I'm also pretty introverted, so even IRL it takes me a long time to just start talking. I don't start threads since either someone has already asked the question or I just look it up on Google. I do love reading all the threads though, especially the ones started by ridiculous people. No matter what others say, I really like our group!

conleyk7

I like watching from the sidelines and getting a laugh about things regs say. You guys are totally right in telling people to lurk before contributing or judging. I used to feel intimidated but now understand you guys are really not malicious at all. I also don't really have enough time to contribute effectively so just get good info and laughs by reading along.

Whitfry

I happen to like our rules. It makes for an organized society. Haven't y'all read The Giver or 1984? Compliance! It is important! The masses must know their place!

Lol, but srsly. I love M15. I like that I know where to go to find out the specific things I want to know. And I like being a haggard glitter troll.

*waves to everyone*

asglover514

Luker here: I've checked things out over here a few times but have pretty much stayed on the AL boards my whole life with TB. Truthfuly even over there I'm not overly posty unless I feel like I can offer something useful, T&Ps, or it's the ticker change thread. 

@cabauer9 we did the same announcement as in your siggy only we used chalk on the sidewalk in the front of our house

corysgirls

So I'm just not really a forum type person. And in early lurking I did notice that some people got pretty snarky and rude to others fairly quickly. It's not hard to search and find these moments either. Upon lurking more, I did notice that maybe if these newer people looked around more, it may not have happened that way. But it does seem to happen frequently that if someone doesn't agree with something that someone else says, a shiz storm can erupt with lots of name calling and whatnot. That's just not my thing. I don't like to argue. I don't use profanity (often). I do like that if I have a question about something, I can usually find an answer to it. But yes, I do feel that one must tip toe around with posts before feeling comfortable. This can be fun. I like to get a little involved in some of the questions, like names and stuff. But I also don't spend very much time on here- so yeah. That's my 2 cents.

Mrs. jk3a

cabauer9 said:

Posting a ton just is NMS. I'm the same way on fb. I post if I think I actually have something of value to contribute.

This is how I am too.

ilovemyducks21

cabauer9 said:

Posting a ton just is NMS. I'm the same way on fb. I post if I think I actually have something of value to contribute.

This exactly. I'm the same way on July '13, there but not a super active poster.

That and I'm waiting for the crazies to (mostly) go away, which they are finally starting to

finallyourturn2

I don't start my own threads because I would rather research (academic sources if possible) when I have a question. After 10 years of IF and losses, I don't typically have very many questions anyway.

I will occasionally post in threads if I feel I have something to offer, but I am super busy with grad school and work right now so I miss a lot.

leomaia

Another lurker here. I am waiting to pass a milestone, and can easily find answers to my questions with a quick search. I have only a few minutes a day to read the posts, but oh man do I have fun with you gals. Hopefully I'll have more free time in the near future to become an active member. I do really like this group

FrecklesInside

cabauer9 said:

Posting a ton just is NMS. I'm the same way on fb. I post if I think I actually have something of value to contribute.

I recognize you.

crunchymamaof2

littlepawsbigears said:

I don't post much because typically I can find answers to any questions by doing a search. I can get on my mobile app for about a half an hour everyday, so I miss a lot of the random thread action. It seems like women really get to know each other on those.

I'm on and off throughout the day and still don't have time for the random thread. It blows up way too fast for me to keep up lol

FrecklesInside

Heartburn is a bitch tonight already! Oh, this isn't the symptoms thread...

Haiiii newbs and lurkers. We aren't so scary

jess412love

I don't think that you guys have "too many rules" at all. In fact you put all the information at the top on how to be a part of this community. It's not rocket science. I comment when I feel lke I have something to contribute or knowledge/experience with the thread. I didn't do an introduction bc I really don't think anyone really cares that much about them. I also usually can only check my phone during my sons nap time and during my insomnia moments. But I do enjoy reading what all you lady's have to say.

finallyourturn2

FrecklesInside said:

Heartburn is a bitch tonight already! Oh, this isn't the symptoms thread...

Haiiii newbs and lurkers. We aren't so scary </p>

It's a bitch every night over here. I already told my husband if the studies are true about baby hair and HB then he better be prepared to raise two apes.

jpavenski

I have posted a few times questions & answers. I actually had to have my appendix removed this week & while in the hospital the ultrasound tech told me I am measuring a week earlier & that I am actually due Feb 28th. My OB said to keep my march 6 due date for now. Kind of bummed though I like being a M15 momma!

FrecklesInside

finallyourturn2 said:

FrecklesInside said:

Heartburn is a bitch tonight already! Oh, this isn't the symptoms thread...

Haiiii newbs and lurkers. We aren't so scary </p>

It's a bitch every night over here. I already told my husband if the studies are true about baby hair and HB then he better be prepared to raise two apes.

HB was a bitch last pregnancy too, like, excruciating during third tri, and my little girl only started getting more than fuzz after her first birthday...she was flat out bald for the first six months. So nahhhh about the old wives tale. But we can definitely bitch about the heartburn.

FrecklesInside

jpavenski said:

I have posted a few times questions & answers. I actually had to have my appendix removed this week & while in the hospital the ultrasound tech told me I am measuring a week earlier & that I am actually due Feb 28th. My OB said to keep my march 6 due date for now. Kind of bummed though I like being a M15 momma!

they changed my date but no way I was switching boards also, I know my conception/ovulation date and know I'm due the second, but I also know I had a very short luteal phase and implanted early and that is probably why I measure ahead.

drudolph11

littlepawsbigears said:

I don't post much because typically I can find answers to any questions by doing a search. I can get on my mobile app for about a half an hour everyday, so I miss a lot of the random thread action. It seems like women really get to know each other on those.

Yes the wonderful world of Google loo you can find anything about anything on the wonderful world wide web. A lot of straight facts but what I feel like the difference is is that on here the same question you may do a search for and get pages after pages of total facts and other boards, here you get first hand, in your face experience super quickly most times too. For me that is the difference. Also if there is something you don't understand you jusT just straight up ask that person and they will tell you straight from their mouth what they mean. Can't do that on A random google search page you know!!

scarlettc27

I actually read at least once a day, but it's often as I'm getting in bed. I've already missed really participating in most of the threads. My husband is out tonight, so I'm actually on here earlier than usual! Also, and this is so stupid really, but I signed up for The Knot with this username 5 yrs ago, and I'm unwilling to post too much info about myself until I have a more anonymous username. Unfortunately, I've emailed to have it changed but never heard back... Oh yeah, and I used to think some people went overboard when correcting driveby posters and newbs when they said something about gender. It gets boring reading 34 responses that all basically say the same thing. Then I started reading on my iPad and realized I had been missing all the hilarious GIFs when reading on my phone. But honestly, I like it even better now that these posts seem to quickly turn to cheese and what everyone is eating.

Readingdiva123

I like others only comment if I feel that I can contribute to the discussion. But I like to read the responses especially if it's a question that I have as well.

kncole28

Another lurker here... I havent posted much mainly bc one i get some of my answers from other posts. Two I really dont feel like I have much to contribute as I feel like im completely dumbfounded when it comes to pregnancy. And lastly Im very high risk, so I try not to get to excited bc im scared to death something will go wrong. I dont think ppl on here are rude I think that they are blunt. Most ppl cant handle that. But im very proud to be apart of this group.

scarlettc27

knitnut said:

I actually read at least once a day, but it's often as I'm getting in bed. I've already missed really participating in most of the threads. My husband is out tonight, so I'm actually on here earlier than usual! Also, and this is so stupid really, but I signed up for The Knot with this username 5 yrs ago, and I'm unwilling to post too much info about myself until I have a more anonymous username. Unfortunately, I've emailed to have it changed but never heard back... Oh yeah, and I used to think some people went overboard when correcting driveby posters and newbs when they said something about gender. It gets boring reading 34 responses that all basically say the same thing. Then I started reading on my iPad and realized I had been missing all the hilarious GIFs when reading on my phone. But honestly, I like it even better now that these posts seem to quickly turn to cheese and what everyone is eating.

To my knowledge, you can log in on the knot and go to your account to change your user name.

Thank you!!

lawsonellis

I just wanna say that I'm not as regular as some of the mainstay regs, but I LOVE this board and community!

I hope the newbies get to know the same cool people I do

chaysefaith

Some of you have tugged at my heart strings.

@leomaia‌ good luck passing your milestone! Is it coming up soon? I'm still waiting to pass one too, only a few more weeks for me.

@kncole28‌ I'm sorry you're having a tough time and I completely understand the want/need to keep your excitement at bay. I will say though, I got the most support and love in my last pregnancy from my BMB and they're all rooting for me now! I hope you can find the strength to jump in. The support you can find here is unparalleled.

@corysgirls‌, I agree the snark is strong here. Were you on any other boards on TB? They're all snarky. I'm like you though, I don't like to argue and often times if someone here disagrees with me I just walk away. I'll usually attempt a response but I just feel like what I'm typing isn't coming out right. Unlike you, I'll say "fuck it" and just not respond.

JessParmesan79

cabauer9 said:

Posting a ton just is NMS. I'm the same way on fb. I post if I think I actually have something of value to contribute.

Samesies.  Plus my access during the day is very limited, so I tend to read along more than post.  I find it hard to keep up with the random thread on a daily basis, and it sounds like that's where a lot of the bonding is occurring.  But I like our BMB.  I get a lot of laughs and can feel the love, even though I don't post a lot. 

genmccarley

RQuinlin said:

Do I stay a noob forever if I can't figure out how to gif and do siggy challenges?

Seriously! I love the gifs, but it seems like a lot of work!

AlysonForbes

I'm a lurker too. My name is Alyson and this is my first baby, I'm 18 weeks. I don't add much to threads because I don't know the answer to the questions! I find the forum really interesting, nice to see people experiencing similar things. I feel as though I missed my introduction time so I just hang out on the sidelines. I check the forum once a week, just to see how everyone is making out. Wishing you all healthy pregnancies!

janda426

I don't think anyone should be scared. I still contribute regularly and I disagree and have argued with other regs and it's not really a big deal. If someone says something I disagree with I'm gonna say something no matter who they are (I'm sure you all noticed...) and I'm still here last I checked.

Just dive in. Don't be an asshole and post in the random thread and you're pretty much golden. If you feel a certain thread topic is too touchy just stay out of it

Clobert

I'm happy for this thread as a newbie/lurker.  I've been lurking for a few weeks partially because I'm more of a reader than a poster but also because I don't want to be the receiver of aggressive gifs. I agree with the rules here but dislike the way they are enforced.  I'm a little worried that if I post something wrong I might cry and I would have to explain to my husband that I'm crying because an anonymous person online posted a gif at me or told me "I don't go here".  I have been mostly on baby center but a lot of it kind of annoys me.  I do like that things here are mostly pregnancy related and there are not as many personal rants about interpersonal problems or "drama" as people like to say, easily googleable questions and ridiculous parties and announcement things that I've never heard of, etc... that the other boards have.  I'm also not going to spend a lot of time on my siggy or my avatar and don't want any pictures of myself online so I'm not sure that I'll fit in on this board.  I'll probably keep lurking but I just wanted to say hi! 

Skrittens

RQuinlin said:

Do I stay a noob forever if I can't figure out how to gif and do siggy challenges?

Me too...although I am going to try the siggy challenge this month.

Eta: words

noodlienoodles

I'm a major lurker! I've only made one post so far because I feel a bit intimated and even the thought of an intro gives me anxiety. It's not even snark that I'm afraid of - I'm just uncomfortable with confrontation or worried that someone will think I'm stoopid

I regretfully admit that I made a couple newb mistakes, such as reporting people that were swearing and lovetiting something like - but not - the pendejo (sp?) post, but only because I thought it was hilarious to see someone act like such a fool and lose her mind. I think that only lasted a day, but I still regret it because it's not nice.

Really though, without being aware, y'all have helped me so much. I've had two early losses and now live in constant fear, so reading your posts and laughing at the gifs has taken my mind off anxiety. Thank you! :x

jaspears0816

I comment occasionally, but usually just read. This board is a wealth of information for a FTM such as myself

DragonflyDreaming

EmpireRecords24 said:

It's taken me a long time to feel comfortable on the board. It's a VERY different tone than my last board. It's not better or worse, just different. I feel like I often have to think too much about my posts before I post, to prevent upset by being misunderstood, etc-- so often I just end up not posting at all, which is almost worse, because it means I'm not contributing, and I don't want to be a "taker". I think the longer I'm active on this board, the more leeway I'll get, maybe? Earn "cred," if you will? Trying to not be "new" forever.

I feel this is very well said! I remember when I first joined, I was super excited, but then read some threads and was intimidated as hell, by most of the people. And I think I joined almost at the beginning (I had some name I couldn't figure out how to change, so I created a new account. Didn't want to ask the board because, as mentioned, intimidated!).

I find that it is very hard to keep up with the random thread, at times, but I've just taken to jumping in when I can.

But yes, in posting on threads, or creating a topic, I find that it's just very difficult to bite the bullet. I even felt worried to post asking questions about cloth diapers, lol!

I have become more comfortable/confident with my posting, but it's just so hard to 'jump in' when you don't know much, or are new and inexperienced with boards (in the beginning).

@chaysefaith‌ I love this thread and am very happy there is one like it. I hope it gets stickied or bumped enough that new people will find it!

rkadlec22

I've just been lurking and posting occasional answers but no original posts. As an obgyn nurse, I don't really have questions but like to read the posts and help where I can. And it's entertaining to just see what's going on.

ettamichele

DragonflyDreaming said:

EmpireRecords24 said:

It's taken me a long time to feel comfortable on the board. It's a VERY different tone than my last board. It's not better or worse, just different. I feel like I often have to think too much about my posts before I post, to prevent upset by being misunderstood, etc-- so often I just end up not posting at all, which is almost worse, because it means I'm not contributing, and I don't want to be a "taker". I think the longer I'm active on this board, the more leeway I'll get, maybe? Earn "cred," if you will? Trying to not be "new" forever.

I feel this is very well said! I remember when I first joined, I was super excited, but then read some threads and was intimidated as hell, by most of the people. And I think I joined almost at the beginning (I had some name I couldn't figure out how to change, so I created a new account. Didn't want to ask the board because, as mentioned, intimidated!).

I find that it is very hard to keep up with the random thread, at times, but I've just taken to jumping in when I can.

But yes, in posting on threads, or creating a topic, I find that it's just very difficult to bite the bullet. I even felt worried to post asking questions about cloth diapers, lol!

I have become more comfortable/confident with my posting, but it's just so hard to 'jump in' when you don't know much, or are new and inexperienced with boards (in the beginning).

@chaysefaith‌ I love this thread and am very happy there is one like it. I hope it gets stickied or bumped enough that new people will find it!

All of this. Both quotes. I was definitely intimidated in the beginning, and sometimes, I still feel intimidated. I know that it's probably just me and I am starting to feel much more comfortable.

I'm a teacher at a school with a dual curriculum, so I have a much longer school day than regular public schools. I find it hard to keep up with the posts and the random thread. It makes it hard to feel like part of the community. I post when I can, and try to offer support, but I doubt if I'll ever feel like a reg.

However, I think you ladies are great and am so glad that we all got knocked up and found each other!!

starfishlovesyou

I have posted an intro and responded a bit, but I mostly lurk because I feel like whatever I was going to say has already been said by the time I read a thread. Also, I couldn't figure out how to add that fabulous troll to my siggy and was embarrassed by my lack of tech know how. Turns out, I just needed to switch computers. My laptop is messed up somehow. Many broken gifs, not all pics load properly, websites layouts are wonky or not loading correctly, stuff like that. Now, if I could just figure out how to make the troll smaller, and maybe how to gif, that would be awesome. I will try to post more anyway, though. Because this board freaking rocks my socks.

meandthebirds

I love the information I get on here especially from the second time mom's. I get more information on here than from Google. I like to read more than commenting , I am more of an introvert and I love the laughs I get from the threads.

ettamichele

@RiverSongWannabe‌ I do that, sometimes! Post when you can. Also, your username rocks my socks off! I love Doctor Who!! Bring back, Amy and Rory!