Relationship Horror Stories

waldothewiener1

So thanks to @athn64‌'s incredible find of this hilarious thread on the knot https://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1040286/the-chicken-nugget-nsfw-language
It has been decided that it would be epic if we created our own thread sharing our funny relationship horror stories.

waldothewiener1

I'll start.

When I was young I dated a guy a little older, he was 21. Let's call him Cupid (my parents gave him that nickname cause he looked like Cupid). Anyway, for New Years my mom bought a bottle of champagne for her and alcohol free for us. Cupid and I were going to a small house party with a couple friends. I grabbed my bottle of champagne and we left. We had a glass or two. Well, turns out, I had accidentally grabbed the wrong bottle, nbd.


OR SO I THOUGHT. Cupid had never had a drop of alcohol in his LIFE, nor had he intended to. He. Lost. His. Mind. He was screaming about how everyone says that EVERYONE has some alcohol at one point and he wanted to be able to say that he didn't. He couldn't wait to tell his kids this one day!

He gave me the cold shoulder for awhile despite my sobs and pleas for forgiveness. It was seriously an accident. I definitely scarred him for life.

This guy would also sweat so much that one time I started kicking and screaming and crying a little (during sex) when it started dripping on my face

KBowen715

In high school, I dated a guy who was just downright crazy. I could make an entire post about the crazy things he did during our relationship and during our break up, but I'll focus just on one particular behavior.

After I broke up with Crazy, I started finding song lyrics in odd places in my life. It was the late nineties, and pop and country was on a broken heart kick. I'd find the print outs in my closet in my clothes, under my bed, taped to my bathroom mirror, etc. It was always weird too, because Crazy would make some reference to whatever song lyrics I had just found (the songs were generally not on the radio), like in a passing phrase or in advice on why I should take him back.

Eventually, pictures of Crazy started randomly appearing too.

Come to find out, Crazy had been BREAKING INTO MY HOUSE and planting song lyrics and pictures throughout my things and then staging 'run ins' to try to win me back (I've always been really big on 'signs' and 'fate')

I think what creeps me out most now is knowing that this guy was a teenager when he hit this level of cray cray.
After the break ins, there was some subsequent stalking for about six months to a year. He sent me a loooong Facebook message when Facebook became a thing, and I blocked him so fast.

People be cray.

spinsoffresonance

When I was in high school I interned at a small private jet airline. When we were getting the jet ready for clients, I ended up hooking up with the pilot in the plane. I was 16, he was 25. I think we hooked up a couple more times after that then parted ways.


Also still at the same company, the big boss asked me over lunch if I was a virgin and if I wanted to have sex with him. I kid you not. He must have been at least 50, married, and had a 16yo daughter. Pilots are dirty dirty men!

gutsysneakers

BLIND DATE STORY

Let's refer to him as JT. I was a junior in college. He was out of college - I'd say he was 27/28 years old. He picks me up & we go to Applebee's (hello, midwest). I was not attracted to him. At. All. Like - not in the least. After dinner he wants to go to a movie - I say I'm not feeling well. 

We get into his car to drive me home and he says he wants to sing something for me. Did I mention this guy kept saying he majored in music throughout the entire night? I kid you not - he turns on his CD player and sings to me "My Love" from Justin Timberlake's new album (ahh, 2006) and sings me the entire song. 

He called the next day and wanted to know if I wanted to come over and eat dinner with his parents...ummm, no thanks. 

dogsombrero

For my first 2 years of sexual experience I thought I hated sex. It was not enjoyable no matter what position, toy etc. I didn't realize that I was the fact that my partners had Vienna sausages or less. I'm not saying size matters but those poor dudes had the size AND skill working against them.

First dude was a drunken hook-up, he finished before I knew what hit me. I specifically recall asking him if that was it. Second guy a year later was my boyfriend he was a big guy and I think he might have taken steriods? We even tried c*ck rings to help him out. I stayed with him a year because I was soooo in love with him. He had anger issues and hit my dog so I kicked him out in a spectacular way and that was that.

I was a fiend by the time I dated the next guy who I met in college. He was 10 years older and nice to me. He also had skillz, I stayed with him so much longer than I should've because hello we only had one thing in common but seriously it was like I discovered myself as a woman.

FlemDance

I dated this guy for 4ish years, through most of college, which was 4ish years too long. He was the brooding musician that was "misunderstood" and "super deep". He was actually just an asshole.

There were a lot of shitty things that he did throughout our relationship, but the worst was when we actually broke up for good. My dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer the a few days before my birthday. I was planning to go visit my best friend in Chicago and go see Wicked as a birthday weekend. I didn't really want to go, but my dad insisted that I go and have a good time. I ended up going and had a blast. We hit up some bars, went to the show - a fantastic birthday weekend.

The day before my birthday (Monday) I'm with the dance team I coached at our first day of band camp (at our school the dancers were part of the band at the time) when my phone keeps ringing like crazy. I step away to answer, and it's my boyfriend. He's ticked off because of pictures on Facebook from my birthday weekend and there were guys in the picture with me. Note: I was not and have never been the kind of girl to try to get attention from guys. We were literally just smiling for the camera. So, he proceeds to break up with me over the phone, a few days after I found out my dad had cancer, and the day before my birthday. I was dumbfounded and said "I can't believe you're doing all this over the phone." His response was "You can come over and I'll do it to your face". Needless to say, I was sad for about .5 seconds. I met DH a few months after that.

waldothewiener1

kittyriot said:

These are great...loving the stories!

After I finished university I moved back to my hometown (small, rural-ish city) for a job. It was lonely, I had been a party girl in all the wrong ways throughout my college years and decided after I finished school and I was back home that I was going to date like a proper human being. So I told the few friends I had in town that I was putting myself out there and was happy to be set up.

A friend set me up with this cute and very accomplished jazz flautist. I thought he sounded romantic. Maybe that should have been the warning...

Anyhow, met for an early evening coffee date. Within five minutes I knew he wasn't for me. Melancholy, brooding, could barely look me in the eye. Just odd. But our musical taste were sympatico. So we talked about that.

He invited me out to a bar a few days later. I didn't know how to say no, so I politely mentioned I was already planning on being there with one of the few friends who was living here at the time...

So I got there and he came over and shyly gave me, like, three mixed cd's of music he had made specially for me.

Once again, in my politeness, tried to thank him and then gently brush him off.

Over the next few days he asked me out multiple times. I kept on turning him down. But he kept on saying he had more cd's for me. But I didn't want to lead him so I told him to enjoy them himself. Two days later there was a manila envelope in my mailbox with my name on it. There were 9 cd's in it and a note saying he made them for me so he wanted me to have them.

I had never told him where I lived.

Creeeeepy.

"I had never told him where I lived."

waldothewiener1

usernameedit said:

My last boyfriend before I met my husband was awful.  He was a spoiled brat and thought everyone who disagreed with him was the "r" word (that's what he called me all the time).

Anyways, one time he got mad because I wouldn't back down and so he took his newly opened 2 liter of diet coke and dumped it on me.  I got sooooo mad so I jumped in my car (we lived together) and was just about to leave when my door flew open and he had opened another 2 liter and was dumping that one on me.  He was laughing the whole time.

He was also extremely paranoid - into all the consipiracy theory stuff - obsessively.
He called me at work one day and said "someone ripped the old cable box off the side of the house" - it was an old Verizon cable box that previous renters had used - we had Comcast.  I get home and go look outside and sure enough the box was no longer on the side of the house.  I go back in freaked out and then think again and go back out.  The screws had just fallen out of the wood.  Then I thought, wouldn't the goverment know we had Comcast and not Verizon?

Soooo glad I got rid of that one.

okay this one is just infuriating.

ksyknelvr73

My high school boyfriend...who lasted into freshman year of college...he was all kinds of special. I think I thought I could "save" him from his circumstances. His dad was a family doctor who sold crack as a side gig (got busted while we were dating, all over our local news), mom was an alcoholic and addicted to various pills, he wasn't doing much with his life and so I tried to be a positive influence. Ultimately though, the relationship ran its course, and once I went away to college and was able to see things for what they really were, I broke it off with him. He proceeded to drive to my college town and take half a bottle of diet pills, then called me to tell me he was going to kill himself b/c I had ruined his life. He wouldn't tell me where he was so I grabbed a couple friends and we drove around searching for him. Finally found him, rushed him to the hospital, they were able to pump his stomach and ultimately he was released and was fine, had to do a psych evaluation. This was obviously terrifying and upsetting to me, and I felt horrible.

Less than a week later, he had a new girlfriend.

dogsombrero

Not a boyfriend story per se BUT it was technically while DH and I were dating. We were feeling like awesome pet owners at the dog park, our 2 mutts running around, chatting with other folks. Our younger and more naughty dog pops a squat so DH grabs the bag to clean up the doo. Apparently he had eaten a used condom out of the trash and was trying to pass it while simultaneously trying to run from the poo balloon chasing him. We were MORTIFIED and couldn't get the dogs loaded up fast enough. We went out that day and got step trash cans with secure lids.

spinsoffresonance

I thought of another one. Sophomore year in college, I had been going out with DH for about a year (obviously we weren't married at the time). DH was having a party and I got way too drunk. Last thing I remember was going to DH's room, kicking my shoes off and passing out in his bed with all my clothes on.

I wake up in the morning. DH is in bed naked. I am naked. My used tampon is on the floor in the middle of the room. I know I would never leave a tampon on the floor like that no matter how drunk I was. So I wake DH and asked what happened. He is confused, might still have been drunk, says we had sex and he thought I was moaning and was into it. Um no, I'm pretty sure I was passed out the entire time. We were both so drunk that we'll never truly know what happened. Lucky for him we had had sex hundreds of times so I wasn't about to report it but I do still give him a hard time about it once in a while.

waldothewiener1

Trigger warning: don't read this if you're eating. It's real, real gross.


When I was a freshman in college I was sort of seeing this guy, it was the kind of situation where he was a good friend and he was so into me so I wanted to try to make it work, but the attraction was never there for me. He was lazy and gross. Anyway, I was his first anything so he liked to explore me like a fetal pig and do stupid stuff, for example, he blew INTO MY VAG AS HARD AS HE COULD which gave me an awful yeast infection a day later; first and last time I've had one.

Another time... We were both naked and he was straddling me, sitting on my stomach and playing with my boobs, again just being stupid. Then I think to myself, I don't know if I want him sitting on me cause I know how lazy and gross he is so I tell him to get off. Sure enough.. THERE IS A HUGE SMUDGE OF FUCKING SHIT ON MY STOMACH. I shot up and screamed and ran into the bathroom to wash myself and made him leave. That scarred me for life, I still gag thinking about it.

KBowen715

waldothewiener1 said:

Trigger warning: don't read this if you're eating. It's real, real gross.


When I was a freshman in college I was sort of seeing this guy, it was the kind of situation where he was a good friend and he was so into me so I wanted to try to make it work, but the attraction was never there for me. He was lazy and gross. Anyway, I was his first anything so he liked to explore me like a fetal pig and do stupid stuff, for example, he blew INTO MY VAG AS HARD AS HE COULD which gave me an awful yeast infection a day later; first and last time I've had one.

Another time... We were both naked and he was straddling me, sitting on my stomach and playing with my boobs, again just being stupid. Then I think to myself, I don't know if I want him sitting on me cause I know how lazy and gross he is so I tell him to get off. Sure enough.. THERE IS A HUGE SMUDGE OF FUCKING SHIT ON MY STOMACH. I shot up and screamed and ran into the bathroom to wash myself and made him leave. That scarred me for life, I still gag thinking about it.

Oh. My. Gag.

FlemDance

waldothewiener1 said:

Trigger warning: don't read this if you're eating. It's real, real gross. When I was a freshman in college I was sort of seeing this guy, it was the kind of situation where he was a good friend and he was so into me so I wanted to try to make it work, but the attraction was never there for me. He was lazy and gross. Anyway, I was his first anything so he liked to explore me like a fetal pig and do stupid stuff, for example, he blew INTO MY VAG AS HARD AS HE COULD which gave me an awful yeast infection a day later; first and last time I've had one. Another time... We were both naked and he was straddling me, sitting on my stomach and playing with my boobs, again just being stupid. Then I think to myself, I don't know if I want him sitting on me cause I know how lazy and gross he is so I tell him to get off. Sure enough.. THERE IS A HUGE SMUDGE OF FUCKING SHIT ON MY STOMACH. I shot up and screamed and ran into the bathroom to wash myself and made him leave. That scarred me for life, I still gag thinking about it.

I'm literally trying to hold myself together in my classroom right now because this is so damn hilarious and disgusting simultaneously.

sparklingdiamond

waldothewiener1 said:

Trigger warning: don't read this if you're eating. It's real, real gross. When I was a freshman in college I was sort of seeing this guy, it was the kind of situation where he was a good friend and he was so into me so I wanted to try to make it work, but the attraction was never there for me. He was lazy and gross. Anyway, I was his first anything so he liked to explore me like a fetal pig and do stupid stuff, for example, he blew INTO MY VAG AS HARD AS HE COULD which gave me an awful yeast infection a day later; first and last time I've had one. Another time... We were both naked and he was straddling me, sitting on my stomach and playing with my boobs, again just being stupid. Then I think to myself, I don't know if I want him sitting on me cause I know how lazy and gross he is so I tell him to get off. Sure enough.. THERE IS A HUGE SMUDGE OF FUCKING SHIT ON MY STOMACH. I shot up and screamed and ran into the bathroom to wash myself and made him leave. That scarred me for life, I still gag thinking about it.

That is so disgusting!

spinsoffresonance

@waldothewiener1‌ eeeeewwwww! Totally made me think of Miranda and the skid marks episode of sex and the city .
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=khbzHVwVKd4
Why does this happen? Is it laziness?

yvanehtnioj

Ugh I dated so many losers before meeting H. This one guy (we'll call him Ukelele) was a bike messenger. While we were developing a flirtation/getting to know eachother, I had only ever seen him with his shirt & hat on. One night we went swimming and they came off. Balding, but not the OK kind of balding where the guy just keeps it super short, but like a skullet. He knew it looked horrible and thought it was hilarious. And back hair. So. much. back hair.

I should've known better and just nope'd my way out there. But he was so into me, I had tons of fun hanging out with his friends, and I was semi-new in my city with no friends of my own yet. 

Even though he was a bike messenger, he was still kinda fat because he was so slow. He would eat the most disgusting food and get the worst gas (potstickers + ranch dressing = WTF GTFO GO HOME). I was vegan so this was doubly disgusting. He was also known for taking his clothes off at parties. I thought he was over that phase in his life until one night I left him alone for 15 minutes and came back to him being naked. Like just hanging out at this huge party in a group of people. 

The relationship dragged on 3 more months. The only reason it did is because very early on I had a bike accident that led to a most unfortunate...pelvic injury (yeah, stitches in the hoo-ha). The fact that he took care of me while I was out of commission coupled with the fact that I was not allowed to have sex for a couple of months allowed the relationship to go on longer than it would have. I didn't have to deal with the fact that I was just plain not attracted to him, his farts, or his small, party-loving weiner. 

He kept trying to win me back, for like a year. I told him I liked preppy guys and he went out and replaced his wardrobe with shit from the Gap. I like that song from The Jerk and he went out & got a ukelele, learned to play it, and left me a 4am voicemail in which he sobbed & sang the song. 

tbiscuit18

A couple of years before I met DH I met a super nice guy through a close, mutual friend. We went on a couple really nice dates and he was a complete gentleman. While I liked him, I knew it was a relationship that would go nowhere. I was planning on going to Mexico for a friend's wedding a few weeks in to the relationship, so I figured when I got back it would be easy to just end it then. 

He wanted to spend all of this time with me before I went and typically when one person isn't "feeling it" the other person can pick up it. But this guy was not reading my signals. A couple nights before I left he came over for what I thought was to hang out, only guy walks in with a duffel bag. My stomach sunk. Great. He wants to sleep over. I tried the "I'm not feeling well", etc. but guy wouldn't leave. He proceeded to get himself ready for bed, brushed his teeth, washed his face...dude was prepared. So I put on my grandma jammies, long sleeves and pants, I think I even tossed on socks, and crawled in to bed. Of course he wanted to snuggle. And then out of nowhere he gets undressed under the covers and whips out a condom. WTF! We haven't had a serious make-out session, but dude's ready for sex. I ended up having sex with him because I was stupid and felt bad. Pity sex is soooo not awesome. 

I went to Mexico and came back and I got together with him to break up. I was mean and he cried. ALOT. He was crying so much at the bar we were at that I excused myself to the bathroom because I was embarrassed. Luckily we drove separately and I was able to leave shortly after. I think I literally dated the guy for maybe 6 weeks. Not even. 

It's been about 7 years and last I heard he's still single, but has a killer job that makes him $$$. 

yogasailmomma

I was wasted at a bar in college, met a guy, gave him my number and a few days later I went on a date with him. When I showed up at the resturant he met me at my car...dude was totally cross eyed! I has spent a whole night with him at a bar and didn't even notice! I then spent the entire dinner trying not to stare and every story/thing we talked about he's like "yea, I know, we talked about that last weekend". Should have been a clue that I drank wayyyy to much back then

caycelee

SSoegaard2011 said:

Some great stories ladies... as in entertaining... most of these guys sound like creeps in one way or another.

I wish I had a story to share, I had a BF in high school... as far as I know he was totally normal, and nine months after graduating high school I met DH, & we've been together ever since, so I really have no horror stories to share... kind of feel like I missed out on some kind of womanly right of passage or something.

I'm trying really hard to think of a funny, crazy bf story but nothing yet I am enjoying reading these so thank you for taking one for the team and dealing with these crazies!

KBowen715

Oh! I have another!

When I was just out of high school, I met this older guy who lived behind my Dad's house. He was over-the-top into me, and I just wasn't feeling it. He was somewhat cool with my disinterest, and it became kind of a joke even though he still made moves all the time. He was cute, friendly, and funny, there was just something....off.

He began bringing me presents, constantly. Designer clothes, perfume, flowers on my car, shoes, etc. One time, I noticed one of those security tag thingies was still on a pair of jeans he had given me. I told him and asked for the receipt so I could take it to the store to have it removed. He got weird about it and insisted he take it, despite my telling him there was no need for him to hassle with it. I was just a part time college kid, and he obviously had a big serious job that afforded him the ability to sugar daddy me.....right?!!

So I stopped hearing from him, until about a year later. I got a long winded letter from PRISON, where he had been arrested for theft and who knows what else.

So, yeah. I was courted by a guy who gave me gifts that were stolen.

tbiscuit18

@KBowen715 OMG! Hilarious! 

absentmindedwife

Wow ladies! This thread made me realize how boring my life has been lol. My first boyfriend is my DH.

spinsoffresonance

@ISeeYouRN‌ I'm seriously judging your friend for setting you up with a 70yo, what was she thinking?

SurprisePartySue

I'm loving these stories!! I'm boring I've been with my husband since I was 17. My previous boyfriends were somewhat normal. Lol

letal316

MeaganStringer said:

I'm loving these stories!! I'm boring I've been with my husband since I was 17. My previous boyfriends were somewhat normal. Lol

This. Except I was 18 when I met MH.

gypsymystic

Well, while I enjoy these stories, I almost wish mine was as funny as them. Dating a weirdo would have actually seemed perfectly acceptable or even great compared to my ex. 

*EDIT: Maybe I missed the point, or took the title of this post too literally, because my story truly boarders on horror story, minus the funny parts.

The only 'creep' I ever dated was a straight up abusive asshole. I was 20 and he was 31, I figured he would be mature but he was far from it. He would throw tantrums when he didn't get his way, drank a bottle of wine (or three) a night, spent hours in the bathroom doing some bizarre, scheduled bathroom rituals daily during which If I was there, we could not leave at any time it might come close to his 'bathroom time' and also nobody who came to visit- friends, guests etc- his or mine were allowed to use his bathroom. (The only one in the apartment). I guess I should feel special he allowed me to. 

     He kept glasses of half full water upright EVERYWHERE in his bedroom- days, months, weeks old you name it; and would DRINK THEM if he got too parched to make it to the sink and fill a new one up. Should have seen the signs, because after awhile of dating he started telling me about how his mother (a single mom) forced him to go to reform school, he ran away and she had some orderlies or whatever literally restrain him and take him back after she promised she would not make him go back. Apparently, some dudes there tried to rape him... at knifepoint and she thought at the age of 11 he was making it up so he didn't have to go back. As a result, he downed xanax for his anxiety by the handful daily. With alcohol, of course.

     Final straw was 6-7 months of seeing him on and off, (he lived too far away for us to see each other much except for occasional overnight stays on the weekend) he snapped one day when he was drunk and for our first valentine's day tried to strangle me. Not even sure why at this point, 10 years later... but I sped off into the night with him literally chasing my car. He called me leaving apologetic messages for months, then crazy ones, drunken ones, and finally angry ones saying 'he was too good for me anyway' and "his Ex GF would have him back in a heartbeat, in fact, he would call her up right after hanging up with my message machine for a booty call" etc. Then on my birthday, like 6 months later he asked a mutual friend for some numbers and called up my bestie, drunk as $*** telling her they should hook up, to tell me happy birthday and (his Bday was 1 week after mine) that they should hook up in a couple days so she could give him a 'proper bday present'. She had met him maybe a grand total of 1 or 2 times casually before he and I met through a mutual friend. She was mortified, horrified and she cried, playing me the messages he left her saying some nasty stuff. 

     Needless to say, my new boyfriend, (DH now) was piiiiiiiissssssssed, because my BFF is/was his BFF's girlfriend of several years at the time (they are engaged to be married now, and our 'best couple' friends), and the two of them plus a mutual guy friend who knew my ex and hated his a$$ from day one, drove 3 towns over the next night looking for my ex to kick his ass. He didn't answer the door, but DH and the guys then returned the favor by calling him and leaving the message that if he phoned either one of us again, he would be sorry. He never did, thank GOD. But he has tried to FB me messages years later apologizing once, and another time intoxicated until I let him know I contacted a lawyer to get a restraining order, and then blocked him.

waldothewiener1

@Azlebella‌ that is a crazy story. What a huge douchebag. I'm glad you got out of that relationship.

spinsoffresonance

@Azlebella‌ so glad you made it out safely.

spinsoffresonance

One of DH's friend, let's call him Jack, is in a commited relationship. They are swingers. So Jack asks DH if he can have sex with me. DH says no way. Jack says it doesn't have to be one way. DH can have Jack's girlfriend for the night . DH still says no. Jack says DH can watch if he wants. Still no. Jack yells at DH saying he is selfish because if he (jack) had a car he would let DH drive it!

spinsoffresonance

letal316 said:

MeaganStringer said:

I'm loving these stories!! I'm boring I've been with my husband since I was 17. My previous boyfriends were somewhat normal. Lol

This. Except I was 18 when I met MH.

I've been with DH since I was 19. Didn't think I'd have stories to share but I keep coming up with more. I have at least one more, which I can't think of right now, but I'll be back

KBowen715

I get so excited every time there are more comments on this thread.

yvanehtnioj

Hmmm...more....

OH MY GOD I forget about this one but when I was 19 I was "seeing" (going to his house & sleeping with) a guy who eventually blew off a date because his buddy was going to get them into a tanning salon for free. Yes, he ditched out on sex to go tanning. 

KBowen715

bunannie said:

What is the weirdest reason everyone has for stopping seeing someone?

I definitely went through a period where I did not want to be in a relationship and kept breaking things off with decent guys for silly reasons.

One guy I was dating about 9 years ago.. we really hit it off, had endless things to talk about, he was super cute, had a steady job.. was kind of shy and didn't have a lot to contribute to conversations with new people, but the clincher was really that he had SMALLER THUMBS THAN ME! And I have teeny hands! It was so weird!

Another guy had been a friend for a while and we started hooking up after being out with friends on weekends and whatnot. He lived a couple blocks from me and was really cool, cute, nice, but didn't have a lot going on for him life-wise at the moment.. didn't know what he wanted to do yet. But the real reason I decided not to see him was because he naturally had no arm hair! It was like pre-pubescent peach fuzz. Yet, he had a hairy chest.. but no arm air? Too weird for this girl!

Hahaha.. and that is the end of my superficial rant. 

Having a stupid name. I live in Texas, and any name that sounds country or redneck is an ender. I couldn't respect a man whose name was awful. I went through a stint of seeing a guy with a stupid name, so I called him something else. Apparently I 'offended' him. Meh.

yvanehtnioj

bunannie said: What is the weirdest reason everyone has for stopping seeing someone?
I definitely went through a period where I did not want to be in a relationship and kept breaking things off with decent guys for silly reasons.
One guy I was dating about 9 years ago.. we really hit it off, had endless things to talk about, he was super cute, had a steady job.. was kind of shy and didn't have a lot to contribute to conversations with new people, but the clincher was really that he had SMALLER THUMBS THAN ME! And I have teeny hands! It was so weird!
Another guy had been a friend for a while and we started hooking up after being out with friends on weekends and whatnot. He lived a couple blocks from me and was really cool, cute, nice, but didn't have a lot going on for him life-wise at the moment.. didn't know what he wanted to do yet. But the real reason I decided not to see him was because he naturally had no arm hair! It was like pre-pubescent peach fuzz. Yet, he had a hairy chest.. but no arm air? Too weird for this girl!
Hahaha.. and that is the end of my superficial rant. 

I can't remember any of my own but my friend was notorious for this. She stopped liking one guy because he called Reese's peanut butter cups just "Reese's" and another because he shopped at Mervyn's. I had seen him there and just mentioned it in passing, "Yeah I saw James at Mervyn's on Saturday" and she was like "Wait, you saw him where?"

ETA: Weird quote thing, tried to fix

spinsoffresonance

bunannie said:

What is the weirdest reason everyone has for stopping seeing someone?

I definitely went through a period where I did not want to be in a relationship and kept breaking things off with decent guys for silly reasons.

One guy I was dating about 9 years ago.. we really hit it off, had endless things to talk about, he was super cute, had a steady job.. was kind of shy and didn't have a lot to contribute to conversations with new people, but the clincher was really that he had SMALLER THUMBS THAN ME! And I have teeny hands! It was so weird!

Another guy had been a friend for a while and we started hooking up after being out with friends on weekends and whatnot. He lived a couple blocks from me and was really cool, cute, nice, but didn't have a lot going on for him life-wise at the moment.. didn't know what he wanted to do yet. But the real reason I decided not to see him was because he naturally had no arm hair! It was like pre-pubescent peach fuzz. Yet, he had a hairy chest.. but no arm air? Too weird for this girl!

Hahaha.. and that is the end of my superficial rant. 

I feel like I'm reading a Seinfeld episode!

dogsombrero

I broke it off with a nice Navy guy because he shaved his chest. It gave me road rash while we were in bed because he let it get to 1/4" stubble- yuck!

FlemDance

I stopped dating a guy when I was a senior in high school only because he liked frisbee golf. Bush league move on my part: I'd already invited him to my school's prom way in advance (he went to a different school) and by the time I wanted to end things I had no other date options. I spent most of the dance dodging him - I even danced with the principal to get away from him! (he was a good family friend - not creepy at all!). Looking back on it, that was a really shitty thing of me to do. The only good thing I did was that insisted that I pay for our dinner and tickets as it was my prom. I still feel like a really crappy person.

Wow. Did not intend to write about how *I* was the shitty one on the date. Alas, here we are.

*hangs head in shame*

operaghost

kc83 said:

bunannie said: What is the weirdest reason everyone has for stopping seeing someone?

I dated a guy in college who got me the weirdest Christmas gifts ever. It consisted of: a leopard print lawn chair, and fuzzy leopard print fisherman's hat, and this old lady-ish ceramic turtle that had a candle when you lifted up the shell. It had the feel of random junk you buy at a yard sale. Next!

gypsymystic

lica001 said:

One of DH's friend, let's call him Jack, is in a commited relationship. They are swingers. So Jack asks DH if he can have sex with me. DH says no way. Jack says it doesn't have to be one way. DH can have Jack's girlfriend for the night . DH still says no. Jack says DH can watch if he wants. Still no. Jack yells at DH saying he is selfish because if he (jack) had a car he would let DH drive it!

@lica001

LOL, we knew a couple who were very similar, also swingers. H met them and from day one, he swore up and down that they were trying to get us into bed. (I knew them prior) I told him he was nuts! But sure enough, one day we all went out for drinks and when we came back to their place after, the husband told us we should spend the night- in their room. I laughed it off and politely declined. Since It seemed I just wasn't 'getting it' he turned to H and was like "How about I get your GF for the night, and you can have my wife". H sized him up for a moment, but it was then I realized he was dead serious. The wife hugged MH (just my boyfriend at the time) and was like brushing her boobs all up on him. She was a hot redhead, BTW. Apparently they had a thing for redheads... H responded, "No thanks, I don't like to share" and the husband then asked if He would let the wife and I fool around while they watched. H said no, and repeated that he didn't share with females either, and we left. As soon as we got in the car H admitted he was afraid that if that situation went down that the husband would try and get inappropriate with him anyways. Which, looking back I do not doubt. H was right all along, he always is. :P