PTing: SO edition

unaveragejane · September 2014

How do/did you get your SO on board with PTing your LO? I can't seem to quite get mine to get with it. For example, I was heading upstairs to grab a quick shower when we noticed N doing his poop face. I took him to the restroom where he peed, but he wouldn't poop. I put him in training pants (I know, not as good as naked for pt purposes) and we had the whole "big boys poop in the potty" convo for the millionth time. I was upstairs for 20 minutes max. When I got back, DH let me know that the "whatever that thing he was wearing" was dirty and on the kitchen counter. (GAG!!!) I told him it should go in a bag instead of the counter. So now aside from the grossness he put in my kitchen, I'm frustrated that DH didn't send N back to the bathroom. (It's totally obvious when the kid poops.) In all fairness, I have not created a set plan for PTing; I was kind of leaving it to him following my example and using some common sense. So do I need to set forth a plan and timetable? And how do I get him to pay attention to it?

TJ1979 · September 2014

I have learned that mh doesn't observe and copy. If I want him to do something specific, I have to explain it. So before heading up to shower, I would have to say "D, the toddler needs to poo, and will do so any minute now. As soon as you see her trying, please take her right to the bathroom and see if she will go on the potty. Thanks."
I love mh and he's a great dad. He just doesn't always think. And apparently he can't read my mind. I'd exchange him for a new model if the mind reading feature were guaranteed.

CLLDLL · September 2014

Ha ha ha...after 10 years of marriage I have decided that to men if no one dies or ends up in the ER it was a successful day. They just don't think like we do.

So like TJ's hubby, mine needs very explicit instructions if I want him to do something like I would do it. With D he was actually the better cheerleader when we tried PT'ing. When it wasn't successful and we stuck with slow paced PL'ing, I just made sure to do a lot of communicating with him about what D knew and didn't know and how I hoped he'd handle things when I was gone. He still ended up teaching him how to pee behind a tree at a little league game, against my wishes, but I guess that's a father son bonding thing or something.

I would just keep talking with him. Explain why the poopy trainer in your kitchen shouldn't happen again withhout embarrassing him, and keep talking about what works with N and what doesn't . Who knows maybe he'll have a brilliant suggestion on hour to get N to want to poop on the potty!!