Another vent. . . kinda long

halleyann821

I'm officially fed! DH has been ABSOLUTELY NO HELP with anything around the house. I know I'm a SAHM and I've never minded doing all the house work and errands but he doesn't seem to understand that this time around I have twice as much to do and half the time to do it! We have an autistic 2 yr old, 3-6 Dr./Therapy appointments throughout the week between my DS and I, and I'm due in just over two weeks. There is some stuff that's really hard for me to do, that would only take him a few minutes. Not to mention the stuff I just CAN'T do (i.e. move furniture or clean the closet shelf I can't reach!) When I do ask for help he purposely starts an argument and we spend the whole day bickering so even I can't get anything done! How the hell am I supposed to get ready for this baby when not only do I not get any help but he's working against me! While I'm at it I'm really tired of everyone telling me to "calm down, there's plenty of time you're not due for two weeks". Do these people not realize that a due date is an estimate?! My MIL literally told me if I didn't have the baby on the day she was off work that she was going to be pissed at me bc it's my fault I chose a VBAC instead of a repeat C-section! Even if I wanted a C-section who is going to help me take care of DS while I'm recovering??? Not her, that's for damn sure! But hey let's just get cut open cause it's easier on your schedule! DS is almost 3 and she's seen him maybe 12 times IF THAT and she lives 20 min away! But hey I'll just do everything myself like I always do and everyone else can go shove it :-)

MuffinMom14

Um. Welcome? And I'm sorry?

Leysin97

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. DH just keeps telling me "it'll get done". We now have 8 days before scheduled c-section and he works ridiculously long hours. Tried to convince him to hire someone to do a deep clean but he said no. He thinks that's strange and won't go for it. So, I shall just wait and see. I stopped getting upset because that didn't seem to help any.

2goingon3

Sorry about your DH, it sucks that he's not helpful, but your MIL is not having a baby, so regardless of how you feel about her, there's no point getting upset about her help or lack of help.

Also, if your house is clean enough for your 2 year old, it's clean enough for your newborn! If you have bigger concerns/responsibilities, then you can curb your nesting urges and just don't worry about that closet's top shelf. Chances are your infant won't be in there anyways.

Best of luck, hope he comes around.

halleyann821

lol ya not worried about my MIL just had to get that part out and it's not that my apartment isn't clean it's that we live in a ridiculously tiny apartment and no room for baby's stuff its all just laying in my bedroom floor and I've tripped over it twice in my sleep (once smashing my belly into the crib OUCH) if I don't "clean" the stuff there's no room for anything. All my nesting instincts are overridden by exhaustion but there is still stuff that HAS to be done before DD gets here but I feel better now

nightowl1989

Sorry about your DH and sorta understand where you're coming from. The last time the cat litter got cleaned, for example, I did it because it was so bad the cats were just going on the floor beside it. Between that and dishes and finishing the nursery...ugh. It's annoying. Let me guess...he instead goes out and does whatever "chore" he wants that can really wait for another time? My DH decided yesterday was the perfect time to make a flower bed out of part of our yard. Meanwhile, something in the kitchen smells so rancid I can't even go in there, but NBD right? :-/

Hope it gets better. Just try not to stress out about it...especially your MIL. They can be annoying sometimes, and this is your baby and your choice of how to deliver it so she is going to have to deal with that.

Klavanga74

starla487 said:

I just scheduled a house cleaner to come in next weekend. DH isn't a fan of them, but it's either that or listen to him whine about how he has to do chores all weekend. And I can only do so much right now.

But - yeah...

Love this...when I went back to work after being a SAHM for 6 years, I declared that I was setting aside the money needed to have someone clean our house a couple of times a month.  Do they lift the huge sectional when they clean?  No, they don't.  Do I care?  No, I don't because I come home to an entirely clean house twice a month.  But DH thinks they're terrible because they don't move every piece of furniture.  YET...I don't see him moving furniture to clean.