Considering IVF...

Egsin

Hello all…

DH and I have been TTC for about 3 years.  I have PCOS and he has a borderline count with low motility.  After three failed IUI cycles with both clomid and follistim our doctor has recommended we move on to IVF.

I need a little perspective on IVF.  Everything I know about it seems daunting.  I'm a ball of nerves over the process as well as the possible long term side effects.  Has anyone had any success or know anyone with positive experiences?  Additionally, any negatives that you've come across?  Just trying to make a rational decision moving forward.

Thanks!

starlightgator

As far as I know the only long term side effects are having a baby to raise if all goes well. Of course, it can be a long painful journey for many of us. It's a last chance situation for me and DH. So, if you've tried everything and still want to move forward, maybe the benefits amid hope will outweigh the difficult nature of this process.

bears1011

it can seem very daunting. i always thought i wouldn't explore IVF, but after 4 years of trying, i decided that if i don't try it, i know i'll always regret it in the future. i had done injectibles before, so the only thing i was nervous about was the egg retrieval. i decided i needed to just suck it up and get through it! i am now 5 days past my transfer and honestly it went by faster than i thought it would and it wasn't that bad. yes, i felt crappy about 6 days into stims until a couple days after transfer. ER wasn't bad (was asleep), but the couple days after were tough. i was in some pain the day of and the next couple days i was just very bloated and uncomfortable. the transfer is a breeze. now my bloating is finally going away and i feel like myself again. so basically it was about 2.5-3 weeks (i did the shorter antagonist protocol) of feeling crappy/worried/stressed/ but i got through it and am so happy i went for it. 

i think that i was really lucky, the process went very smoothly for me, but of course that doesn't always happen. and i don't know if it was successful yet, but at least i tried. you never know until you try it, but if it's something that in your heart you know you need to try, then i say go for it. we're tougher than we think!

Egsin

@bears1011 - Thank you for your perspective!  You make a really good point about trying everything you can with no regrets.  I think I just need a mind shift in order to move away from the fear of it all.

And yes, we are pretty tough!  

I wish you lots of baby dust moving forward! 

bears1011 said:

you never know until you try it, but if it's something that in your heart you know you need to try, then i say go for it. we're tougher than we think!

aliciafiggy

It's more daunting to think about.  As scary, stressful, and annoying as it is, you do get through it.

katers79

It's Very scary and overwhelming up front. I was pissed to be in the IVF world. The wait to start stims takes FOREVER, but then it flies by! The injections aren't as bad as you'd think. Ask all your questions as you go, and read as much as you can to be prepared. This forum has taught me so much, so search anything you're unsure about. GL!

Twinkie0612

I think for me IVF was scary the first time around because it was new and unknown.

Is it fun? not really. The meds cause lots of fun side effects, such as headaches, heartburn, hot flashes, and bloating. ER causes some pain and discomfort. ET isn't bad except for the full bladder part. Then there is all of the anxiety about number of eggs retrieved, embryo quality, and waiting for betas.

Is it something I would never do again? Obviously not since we are gearing up for our 4th cycle. 

For me, nothing in the process is too much to handle and it is all worth it to have a chance at getting pregnant.  I am begining to worrry about how we will afford treatments going forward if this cycle doesn't work, but physically and emotionally I am not ready to give up.

siempre595

Personally I think the worst part is just going through the process that seems to be unnecessary for like 90% of the people around you.  I work in the medical world, so to me the shots and the lab draws and even the retrieval were not that big of deal.  I see my patients going through way worse.  (Not trying to offend anyone, just my perspective).  But the thought of plunking down all this money with no promise of a pregnancy at the end of the road is rough.  It's a huge build up, and it may not work.  That's been the hardest part for me.  

Mrs.Ess

siempre595 said:

Personally I think the worst part is just going through the process that seems to be unnecessary for like 90% of the people around you.  I work in the medical world, so to me the shots and the lab draws and even the retrieval were not that big of deal.  I see my patients going through way worse.  (Not trying to offend anyone, just my perspective).  But the thought of plunking down all this money with no promise of a pregnancy at the end of the road is rough.  It's a huge build up, and it may not work.  That's been the hardest part for me.  

This completely. I will do whatever I have to to my body, and I know I can handle the physical pain and stress. Emotionally and financially it's another story. Having no guarantee when you are 100% OOP is absolutely the hardest part. Although it may be a tie with being surrounded by people who are blissfully ignorant.

***older child mentioned***















I never mention my LO on the board and I know I could get flamed for saying this but I truly believe that people who have a child after struggling with IF have a very unique love for their child(ren). I'm not saying they necessarily love their children *more* than those who never had trouble getting pregnant, but i do believe it is a different love and appreciation. I pray that everyone here gets to experience that.