What's happening around here?

freeatlast2014

It's like whoa!

MinnesotaMomma91

I think most everyone could agree with what im about to say but.

Were all a bunch of women have been in each others lives for a long time so we get comfortable telling each other the truth.

Unfortunatly for eg she had a rough week and was flammed for several different posts. She unfortunatly didnt want to hear what she needed to hear and only wanted blibd support and decided to leave the group.

But were a family and we still love each other at the end of the day.

freeatlast2014

How do you know she's gone gone?

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jellybean529

The thing is, when you care about someone, you sometimes have to be honest instead of farting puppies and rainbows at them. We gave advice she wasn't ready to hear yet but I wish her the best and I hope she finds peace.

MinnesotaMomma91

@Freeatlast2012 its all in her last post, about wonderibg why her bd isnt around.

freeatlast2014

I read it all @MinnesotaMomma91‌ but didn't see how you knew it was a legit gbcb and not her just bowing out if that thread/disagreement

MinnesotaMomma91

She was facebook friends with @20thirteen @tig594 @jellybean529 and myself after her last bump post she defriended us.

Also, she hasnt come back to defend herself.

freeatlast2014

Oh that's sad

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MinnesotaMomma91

I would have too, to be honest. I had some serious guilt over the idea of a finding out about b through bd getting served with child support papers.

They wound up seperating before he got served and he got served at his parents house. And thats how they found out about b. I do feel bad they found from papers and not their son.

20thirteen

Well, she needed to hear that, regardless of whether or not she agreed with it.  We're not going to be like "Oh, you want to interfere with his life and make him miserable? No, no, that's perfectly healthy.  That's something you should totally do to him."  Because that is in EVERY WAY wrong. I wish I could shove DD in BD's face and be like "DID YOU FORGET ABOUT SOMETHING?" but at the same time, we're totally better off, why should I care? His future relationships are none of my fucking business, if I make them out to be, I would hope y'all tell me the same thing we told her.  Get some god damn therapy, this behavior isn't healthy and isn't the kind of example you want for your child.

20thirteen

@minnesotamomma91

It's ok to feel guilty, but he needs to take responsibility.  

MinnesotaMomma91

20thirteen said:

@minnesotamomma91

It's ok to feel guilty, but he needs to take responsibility.  

Thank you, i try not to feel guilty. A as much as she drives me crazy i apprieciate that she accepts bentley. Bs paternal grandparents dont want to acknowledge b or that hes their grand child.

tig594

And, sadly, there isn't much you can do about it. You can't help how you feel about certain things and you can't MAKE someone else love/want you or your child. It just doesn't work that way. If someone rejects you why would you want to force them into your life for all the wrong reasons anyway?

MinnesotaMomma91

tig594 said:

And, sadly, there isn't much you can do about it. You can't help how you feel about certain things and you can't MAKE someone else love/want you or your child. It just doesn't work that way. If someone rejects you why would you want to force them into your life for all the wrong reasons anyway?

Truth. Bs paternal grandparents and bd might not want b but b is far from unloved. I cant begin to tell you how much love and affection b gets from my friends family and bf.

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20thirteen

He's fighting to not sign over his rights?

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20thirteen

shit.

MinnesotaMomma91

@Becwheat thats so shitty, im sorry that your going through that. Im hoping that bd just leaves b alone. I dont want him popping in and out of bs life confusing him.

Im scared of someday b asking me why bd wanted his siblings but not him because i dont know what to say. But i know that its not my job to answer for bd, bd will have to answer for himself.