Obstacles and roadblocks

jhjocelyn

So this last week has been rough with DD, I suspect we need to sleep train, but there are a few things standing in the way. I thought I'd throw them out here and see if anyone has any input. 

What are some of your roadblocks or obstacles lately? If we brainstorm together maybe we can find some solutions! At the very least, we'll have some support, right? 

DD goes to sleep around 10pm, and regardless of when she goes to bed, she stirs at 3am, then 4am, then 5am, and at 6:30 she is up for the day. Usually the first couple times she wakes up she just needs a pat on the back, the binky or to be scooped up for a minute, then it progressively gets harder to put her down and have her stay asleep. When she eats at 6ish in the morning I am always thinking she'll go back to sleep, yet she doesn't. I really feel like she isn't getting enough sleep although she does take longer naps more often now that this is her new pattern(So about 8 hours overnight with lots of interruptions and then 4 hours of napping during the day). It's been going on for at least a week, maybe more, I've lost track. DH and I don't get to bed until after 11 usually 12am, dd has a medical routine that starts about an hour after she goes to sleep, plus we are usually just eating our dinner and clean up and all that, we're just night owl people and it's become how our family works. Up until recently there's never been a problem, DD usually slept in with me.

So the roadblocks:  I'm a terrible thinker in the night and on no sleep, so I'm honestly if it's DD's reflux waking her up, if maybe she's teething, or if her cf is giving her tummy troubles. She's had a cold this week, and because I'm not pushing it with her food, she's no longer pooping in the night/early ams (thankfully!). I don't want to sleep train if it's a physical ailment, and I'm not sure how to tell when I'm this sleep deprived it's just not pretty... (we've had some stellar MOTY moments this week).

Because of DD's reflux, I stopped feeding her in the overnights, dreamfeeds are not really an option as she has to be able to eat her medicine off a spoon before nursing and can't nurse on an empty stomach. I could give her a bottle of thickened BM, but she still has to be awake enough for the meds. and I'd have to find a time to pump to supply that bottle. I'm pretty sure when this first started I was feeding her and it wasn't putting her back to sleep. I don't feel like hunger is the problem. Her last big meal is at 9pm and then she eats again around 6:30am. 

I feel like the first couple of wake ups are more habit, and then by 5 there's something up, but I'm too far gone to figure it out so we just cry together until she falls asleep. DH rescues us, or I feed her and she starts the day... DH really can't help too much, he does a lot when he's home, but barely gets enough sleep as it is. He's usually up and leaving around the time DD is up for the day. 

  Any suggestions out there? I feel like there's something I'm just missing and I can't figure out what! 

jhjocelyn

Well I usually go by her cues, she has a late afternoon nap, so wakes up around 5-6pm, DH gets home anytime after 7 or 8 so we all stay up together to get some family time in. 10 is usually the late end of a night.  She eats and falls asleep between 9-9:30, last night though she fought off sleep and stayed up until 11 when her therapy finally put her to sleep. It was fine when she slept later in the mornings, and we just stuck to a late day schedule. It's just her and I at home all day so it was easy to work with. Now she is up and at 'em way earlier than I think even she is ready for!  I hate to go too much earlier and lose her time with DH, if that's what will work though I guess we can try it!

MrsW062610

That' s a tough one and lots ot be said.

I would try to change one thing at a time so you can see what is and isn't working, rather than changing everything at once. No need to make her cry it out in the early morning, if an earlier bedtime will fix all that.

Honestly - I would wake her up from her late afternoon nap earlier and try putting her to bed earlier (slow transition to that though) and see if that helps. My DD eats at 7:30pm, down by 8pm, and is up between 5am and 6am. So she sleeps 8-10 hours straight (as long as she's not teething). So I would first play around with her nap and bed times and see if that makes any difference, if you can.

MrsW062610

JGjocelyn said:

Well I usually go by her cues, she has a late afternoon nap, so wakes up around 5-6pm, DH gets home anytime after 7 or 8 so we all stay up together to get some family time in. 10 is usually the late end of a night.  She eats and falls asleep between 9-9:30, last night though she fought off sleep and stayed up until 11 when her therapy finally put her to sleep. It was fine when she slept later in the mornings, and we just stuck to a late day schedule. It's just her and I at home all day so it was easy to work with. Now she is up and at 'em way earlier than I think even she is ready for!  I hate to go too much earlier and lose her time with DH, if that's what will work though I guess we can try it!

Just saw this...since DH only has about 30 min home with her before we start bath time, he has started getting up earlier before he goes to work to play with her then.

holly142

I am sorry you are going through this.  My DD has not been going to sleep for 2 days.  She is getting 2 teeth, practicing new sounds, learned to wave and to shake her head.  Too much is going on for her to settle down.  I am worried that we are losing what we gained with sleep training.  However, I don't want her to suffer on her own.  I am going to wait until a few days after her teeth come in and then start sleep training again. 

If DD is crying, I go into her room.  If she is whimpering/fussing, I wait and she usually falls back to sleep on her own.  What are your DD's cries like?    

Sakura16

We are currently working on this, as DD switched from thumb to booby pacifier (she won't take an actual pacifier). We (mostly me) were up most of the night because she'd fall asleep sucking and wake up if she unlatched or once she reached the crib and start wailing. We'd do this literally for hours...4+ hours sometimes and all sge wanted was to suck or be held while ahe slept. Sleep training was the only option, because not only were we not sleeping, but sge wouldn't get solid, consecutive hours of sleep.

This past week we worked a bit on a modified CIO and she's been STTN with crying/whimpering here and there in her sleep. Currently, we are working on adding nap training as well.

jhjocelyn

Thanks Ladies! I think I've got some good ideas to work with.
Dd doesn't eat overnight so there's nothing to cut out there, I'm not sure if her cries are tummy/reflux troubles or restlessness. She was waking up to poop, the pooping has stopped but she still wakes up
I think I'll wait till her cold passes and in the meantime start by tweaking her bedtime routine. It's tricky because I need her to eat that last meal at 9ish. We're supposed to feed her 7 times a day, at least 90 minutes apart. That means about every 2hrs from 6ish am on...