Is it unusual...

Regan1976

Is it unusual to not really feel pregnant? Things are happening. Night time pee trips. Ligament pain when sneezing. Random cramps. I really want tomatoes right now. I fall asleep 2 hours before I normally do. I swear I feel like I have a fever. So I know stuff is happening. But it doesn't seem all that real. Will it take the sonogram or the RE telling me to shoo? What really makes it sink in?

AMShark

I'm 8w2d, I've had 3 u/s's, and it hasn't sunk in yet.  I think it may be partly due to my lack of symptoms.  Like you, I'm tired and peeing more often, but I don't have MS - which I think of as the classic pregnancy symptom.

I'm hoping when I get to the 2nd tri and start showing, or when I feel the babies move - but after reading @IntuitiveBlue 's post, I'm wondering about that too.

FishyMom

I'm not sure it does. I wake up every morning thinking it was a dream, but then I try to get up and it's hard and reality rolls in. I do the same thing when I see myself in the mirror. I have been banking on it feeling real when I hold my baby girl. I'll report back!

mdiblasi10

This is my second pregnancy and it still doesn't feel real most of the time! Heck, I sometimes can't believe I'm a Mom. It always feels so surreal to me. So yes, totally normal. The ultrasounds help and holding your baby for the first time does too, but I swear I still have moments where it all feels like a dream.

Congrats, you are pregnant

mrsrichey11

First of all, congrats!!

I'm a little over 22 weeks with twins. I can feel them moving, my belly is huge and only getting bigger as the days go by, I see them every four weeks at my ultrasounds, yet I still don't feel like its real sometimes. Honestly, I don't think its going to feel "real" for me until they are in my arms!

happygirl1013

For me, because of the IF mindset, it didn't feel real until the end of my second trimester. Stomach started getting huge, baby furniture showing up in my house, planning for maternity leave and starting to take classes--- all of these things made it finally hit home. You will feel it at your own pace...just give it time. And congrats!

rox825

I think it started to feel real and sink in for me when I had my shower 2 weeks ago, having so many people there to celebrate *my* baby instead of someone else's, and now having so much baby stuff in the house. I started to feel pretty positive after our A/S but the shower really made me realize, ok yes, this is actually happening! (Knock on wood.)

kmc84

I'm in my second pregnancy and the first one, like this one, never felt real. I've had three u/s and even when I see the baby, I'm just like 'wow, that's cool', but it doesn't register that that is my baby in my uterus that I'm seeing.

With dd, I just went through the motions and it honestly wasn't until about an hour after she was born that it felt real to me. Like pp said, I think the IF brain messes with how much you can accept and when it's 'ok' or 'safe' to accept things.

gldnbearz

IF brain made me detached from the BFP b/c so many negatives couldn't change, could it? Then couple TTCAL brain with IF brain and each MD appt and u/s was still experienced without belief b/c another loss might be around the corner. Even the NT scan and anatomy scan didn't feel real.

Buying the car seat was a surreal experience, when we told ourselves to tape the receipt to the box, just in case we had to return it.

It wasn't until I felt movement, then DH felt movement, and the belly kept getting bigger that I started to think this might be real. With six weeks left to go, I now feel that this kiddo really has a chance of making it into our arms.

It is different for everyone. Do not let the presence or lack of symptoms affect your feelings. It will feel real to you at your oen pace.

Good luck.

ladyteach0505

I am having such a hard time with this. I have an appointment with my counselor tomorrow and my husband is actually going with me because my stress is affecting me and affecting us. I will have my next ultrasound Tuesday and I keep feeling like something will happen because my boobs aren't sore and I'm not sick. DH keeps telling me it's fine but I just can't imagine things working out when I don't feel pregnant. Just praying a lot.

Momarazzi007

So, I've had sonograms and heard heartbeat (home Doppler) and feel movements and it still doesn't feel real to me. I know it is the IF robbing me of really admitting this is happening but I am still in complete denial when it is just me. I only recently in past week or so admitted to my husband I feel no connection to this pregnancy and just can't wait for them to be here and meet them. With my daughter it was the complete opposite- despite ectopic pregnancy and failed fet and then losing her twin I always knew she was there and like she was already my best friend. I hate this feeling, but you aren't alone- it takes different things for different people to get there is what I am learning. Today we have an anatomy scan and I am hoping being able to learn more about them will help me identify and connect better. I hope you find yours soon too- but keep talking (like here- I think the women in this board will get it as I have seen from comments above) and acknowledge the symptoms and any little happiness you feel bc of the pregnancy, hold onto it and when you feel like this- try and remember that.

Margritli

I think it is totally normal. I am 15 weeks and am just now starting to "feel pregnant", and that only thanks to my growing bump, which is becoming increasingly obvious. It wasn't until after our NT scan that I was able to chill a little bit. Not that I don't still worry, but it helps me know that everything looks normal right now. I just hope it stays that way. 

AMShark

@ladyteach0505‌ - I'm a also worried because my breasts aren't sore. I remember that being my only real symptom when I was PG in Spring, so I thought that would come back. Sometimes I wonder if they don't hurt very much because they're already a little stretched from before. (You know, a jeans that are already broken in vs jeans you just pulled out of the dryer sort of thing).
I'm on mobile, so I can't see if you've got a recent loss in your sig, but do you think that's it? I'm not even sure if that makes sense, but it makes me feel better, so I'm going with it.

southernyankeegirl

I'm 23 weeks along, a big old bump, baby kicks up a storm, I've got Braxton Hicks several times a day, and yet I still wake up every day and "realize" I'm pregnant. And there's definitely parts of the day where it feels surreal still. Just fake it 'til you make it ;-)

rox825

I don't know if this will help anyone but I have a friend IRL who had losses and IF and did 2 round of IVF to have her baby.  She said that it took her weeks after the birth before she was really able to connect and bond and feel like that was her baby.  So it may not even happen when the baby is born and that's OK, you will get there!

hopeby2015

I'm 22 weeks pg and I'm totally faking it. It feels like a dream that I will wake up from any minute now. But I try to pretend like everything's normal and this is totally going to happen (God-willing!). Like @southernyankeegirl‌ said, just fake it till u make it!

pmpknbride

I was also a no-symptoms girl. I was super exhausted during first trimester but still didn't make me "feel" pregnant. Even the sonograms didn't feel real...I would have sworn they were using prerecorded u/s or something like a big joke on me. The turning point for me was right around 4 months...my belly really started to pop then, my body was so sore all the time, my appetite increased, pounds were added on the scale and then a week later something flicked me from the inside and then the flutters started to get pretty regular. Now I'm still starting to "feel" pregnant and starting to get pretty darn excited. FX A/S goes well next week. I'm sure it will click for you too, we all have our own pace and I love the fake it till you make it advice...it's great advice!

Ecarabeo217

IF robs us of so much...I feel the same way. I'm shopping and planning but almost like it's for somebody else. I'm an OB myself, so when I see my ultrasound it's ridiculously surreal because it just feels like I'm looking at somebody else's ultrasound...like the 20 other ultrasounds I've seen today. I'm 18+ weeks now and I'm just barely starting to feel some flutters (or at least, I've convinced myself that's what I'm feeling) and I talk myself out of it. I've been pretty good with symptoms, but that hasn't helped in this respect. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I'm sure it will come at some point, but I don't think you can plan for it