Embarrassed

amieeyoung

So my husband had a friend who asked what we needed (they live out of town and probably wouldn't come to the baby shower- which will be in Nov.) Since our shower is a bit away we still haven't made a registry (plus honestly I feel weird making one- I'd rather ppl buy what they want- and I don't agree with people buying pricey gifts unless it is the grandparents and they want to and can afford to).

Anyway he's like well what do we need. I list off stuff like diapers, bottles with plastic liners, bath stuff etc- he texts pack and play... and they bought one. I find it nice and thoughtful, but felt him telling them an item that is more expensive was tacky and embarrassed me. Do you think I am overreacting- is this something that ppl often list on a registry?

baloneydisc

Yes, you're overreacting and yes, people do put pack-n-plays on their registry. If they thought the pnp was too expensive they wouldn't have bought it.

Helenahhandbasket

A pack n play is a pretty standard baby gift.  Maybe this friend felt bad that they can't attend the shower?

Just send a nice thank you card.

jennypolkadots

I understand how you feel in one way. I have never liked being the center of attention or getting gifts, it just feels weird to me. We didn't have a wedding shower and my perfect birthday is DH making dinner and renting a movie Simple gal. Anyways, with being pregnant I have to put that aside and feel thankful that so many people love our little one and want to share in this special time in our lives. We are really fortunate to be able to provide everything our baby needs and not depend on help, but I realize that others like myself genuinely want to help and will also be in the life of the baby. Does that make sense?

I really doubt your husband was thinking when the mentioned the Pack and Play. If it was too expensive, they wouldn't have bought it. Many people, like myself, get great joy out of picking out gifts for other people. I get giddy just thinking about this wedding shower I am going to Saturday lol and the gift is not for you, it is for your baby. And they aren't coming to your shower. Even more, you didn't register or specify so they got to choose one in their price range. 

Send a nice thoughtful thank you card and put the guilt away

amieeyoung

Thanks ladies- I just didn't want us to come across as grabby or whatnot or for them to feel like they had to get one etc. I feel a bit better now- glad I didn't say to much to hubs last night .

Beevol

And this is why I feel so uncomfortable about showers! I love giving and receiving presents as much as the next gal, but the whole shower/registry thing just makes me feel... icky when I have them myself, though logically I know that I LOVE attending other people's showers and really prefer to buy off a registry than find a random thing that they will probably hate or never use.

I would have felt the exact same way if DH had done what your husband did and still I think the previous posters have it right when they say that if it had been too big of a deal, the friends would not have bought it. And, honestly spending $100 on a once-in-a-lifetime-event gift (like the birth of a first baby) is on the high but reasonable side in my social circle. 

ashiscute

Everyone has a different idea of pricey.  I put everything on my registry.  A lot of those things we bought ourselves.  I don't think most people think twice about that sort of stuff.  I would write a thank you note and forget about it.  

minirella

I'm surprised your husband knew what a pack n play is. My husband is clueless on baby items. Even after 4 years I'm pretty sure he only knows 4 words: pacifier, diapers, wipes, and bottles. 

I typically spend about $50 on any kind of shower gift...if you are family, about $100.

sandrabrooke

Pack and plays are awesome.  But can be fairly cheap, so its good  

amieeyoung

Thanks ladies for all the feedback- I feel I can put the guilt away and just be thankful. Also, glad it didn't seem unreasonable of a gift request. I think if it had been a family member I wouldn't have wondered, also got to thinking that in his circle of friends most don't have kids so they are probably just happy and excited for us. Shew.... THANKS girls!!!!!

mellizzard

I get that you are against registrations, but they can be very helpful for your friends and family - especially those who don't have any children. Also, most registries offer a discount to you on any unpurchased items a few weeks prior to your baby's due date, which you can't really go wrong with saving some money. Just my two cents.

Enjoy the pack & play!

BurdyGurl

Registering can be difficult.. I also hated the idea of telling ppl 'buy this' & found myself always looking for the cheaper option to put on there as to 'not look greedy'... I'd say, yeah don't go & register for the MOST expensive items available & give thought to the wallets of those kind enough to purchase something to celebrate your baby... BUT also keep in mind:  Many ppl WANT to celebrate that baby & your family growing, but don't know enough about the topic to make an informed purchase... so a registry can be helpful Also, being registered will help alleviate the possible issue of getting tons of 'baby crap' that isn't useful & clutters up your home or having a few different ppl  the same type of item & then having to deal with returns.  Try looking at it as a tool, one designed to help make your lives easier... & when somebody buys a gift, just graciously accept it & say thank you... cuz it isn't really for YOU after all ... it's for your baby  

Hope that helps a little!!