Somebody reassure me that I'm not being a horrible DIL....
getting married in a couple weeks. I never planned on bringing the boys
for any of it (they're 20 months, for those who can't see my ticker),
but yesterday MIL started getting all insistent that DH and I bring them
to the church so she can get a family photo with them in it. The
wedding is a 45 minute drive away, and in order to be out the door on
time, we'd have to wake the boys up mid-nap. Also, they are not great in
church...more often than not we spend at least half of Mass in the back walking around with them. And if they had only gotten half a nap, I doubt they'd make it even halfway through (it'll be a Catholic wedding Mass, so we're talking an hour-hour and a half). Plus, apparently DH
and I are going to be asked to bring up the gifts (though SIL hasn't
gotten around to asking us yet??), which is kind of impossible holding
toddlers, and there's no one on DH's side that they would reliably go to
without a fit. Oh, also they are pretty darn unreliable for pictures at this age. So after all this fun, we then are supposed to drive 45 minutes back home to drop them w/ my mom,
then venture out for another half hour in the car to the reception? Just
for a picture?? Thanks, but no thanks.
I felt bad, but I
basically told MIL that it wasn't gonna happen, but offered to try a
family photo at the rehearsal dinner instead, but she started pouting
that SIL wouldn't be in her wedding dress. Then she started saying
"You'll have to get your mom to come help at church because I really
want a picture with the boys." Yeah, except that my family wasn't
invited to the wedding (which has been a source of some drama also), so,
while she is happy to babysit, I think it would be rude to ask her to
do 90 minutes of driving to chase babies around at a wedding she wasn't
invited to in the first place.
Grrr. I'm thinking I'm just gonna
have to put my foot down (and DH is totally of the same mind on this)
but I'm not being unreasonable right?? I understand MIL is sentimental
about pictures, but I thought the rehearsal dinner idea was a decent
compromise....plus another SIL wants to get professional photos of the
kids and grandkids done for her for Xmas, so it's not like this is her
only chance for a family picture. She just sometimes gets ideas in her
head about how she wants things to go (usually w/o asking anyone first)
and then gets all bent out of shape when it doesn't work out.
So yeah....this a vent more than anything. I'm sure it looks like I'm just making excuses b/c I don't want to drive an extra hour+ and was looking forward to watching the wedding in peace.....so maybe I'm being selfish? Or she's just being unreasonable??