Can I complain for a minute?

abbalish

My parents are driving me crazy!  H and I have been keeping our news quiet, with the exception of my parents, and a handful of very close friends.  My parents reacted really strangely - I know they're excited but they seem to not believe that I'm pregnant, just because it's early.  My mom was like "Well, I'm excited now but I'm holding off on my true excitement until after your doctor's appointment next month."  And my dad keeps saying "*If* you're actually pregnant...."  But then meanwhile, my mom keeps sending me daily emails wanting to know how I'm doing.  To me it's like....you can't have it both ways - you can't not actually believe I'm pregnant but then still be wanting to know how I feel on a daily basis!  If you're holding off on getting excited until my appointment on the 23rd, then I don't really want to talk about it until then, you know?

I understand things can happen, and I am doing my best to keep myself calm about that possibility.  But that doesn't change the fact that I am, at this moment, knocked up!  I think they are coming from a 1970's mentality, where mothers were sick for weeks and it could only be confirmed by a doctor, and they usually didn't find out until they were 8 weeks along...

Anyway, that's that.  Thanks for reading.  Anyone else have stories of strange reactions, with this pregnancy or prior ones?

oregonhill

I'm sorry you're not getting the reaction you'd hoped for. We're all thrilled for you, but I know that's not the same  My mom keeps checking in, too. She's driving me a little nuts. But, that's not unusual for us.

flyinghorses6

That is frustrating! I would probably just ignore them too. DH and I have agreed not to tell our parents until our first appt...and we will prob wait the whole first tri to tell anyone else. Just focus on yourself and enjoy your inner happiness.

welly01

I'm sorry your parents didn't react the way you wanted.  Hopefully after your appointment they will act more excited for you.  Just focus on your own happiness at the moment and don't let them spoil it!

maybebride

I sort of wish my parents had held off. I didn't get to tell any of the extended family I was pregnant with DS because my stepdad was too excited not to tell. But, that mentality of "waiting for the doctor" is very old school and pretty typical. 

Remember that excited as they may be to become grandparents, you are still their little girl and they also don't want to see you be hurt if anything is wrong. Cut them a little bit of a break.

Ndracer

Their reaction is strange but makes me wonder if they had suffered a loss or know someone (perhaps a sibling of yours?) who had gone through this and got to first appointment only to get bad news? I'm only saying that because after three early miscarriages myself I am not quite ready to believe I'm pregnant until I get to see the little one on an ultrasound. It's just a defense mechanism for myself and wonder if they are doing the same. But you have every right to be less than thrilled with their reaction.

This time we are waiting until first appointment to tell family and maybe even longer. Afraid my mom will spill the beans. She did that last time when I asked her not to tell anyone because it was too early and I'd had history of losses. Then it was just that much worse when I had to tell everyone but happened again. So tight lips this time for us!

twinkletoes3126

I am sorry that you didn't get the reaction you were hoping for. I'm sure that they are very excited for you, but maybe they have suffered a loss and want to be cautious until after your first appointment. My moms reaction was yelling "Are you kidding me?!?". I was a little disappointed but she explained later that she was caught off guard and thought we were waiting until after our Disney trip. I felt much better after talking to her and maybe you could have a conversation with your parents as well and tell them you are surprised by their reaction. Anyway, congrats and I am very excited for you!

abbalish

This is their 8th grandchild - I'm the youngest of 4.  So they should be pros by now!  It's not even so much that they didn't react as I'd hoped, it's just frustrating that they seem to think that my pregnancy doesn't exist just because it's early.  And if that's what they think, then I could do without the daily check-ins and I'd prefer to just not talk to them about it until later on, once they actually believe me.

I may also be a tad over-emotional at the moment and reading a little too much into things 

Anyway, thanks for reading and for the commiseration.

kat0217

My dad's reaction was to tell me not to drink... -.- Thanks a heap, dad. No idea how I would do pregnancy without that ground breaking advice. I knew it was more of a shock reaction though. Once he saw me in person he was really excited. My mom also made comments about it being so early, but I know that's because her first 2 pregnancies ended in miscarriage. Parents don't do everything perfectly, even when their kids are grown. I'm lucky to feel comfortable telling my parents when they're being unintentionally offensive without it hurting things between us. I hope your parents change up their approach soon!

admac3

That is really strange! I'm sorry they reacted like that. I hope they change their tune after your first appt.
We haven't told many people yet and so far everyone has been really excited. I can't wait to hear the stupid remarks people will make about us having a fourth kid.

jwm29

This is odd! My parents were similar... They said "let's get excited when you're a bit further along" then told me about their 1st pregnancy which was a 10 week miscarriage. I am so glad you are keeping positive and vented! I can take a page from you and hope for the best/focus on the positive as well!