I just need to vent. Starting at, hmm, 3 weeks, my mom took it upon herself to start talking about how I was already gaining weight. This continued through the first trimester and led to a blowout fight right around 20 weeks. I thought maybe she would finally get the message. Then my mother in law, who is normally fine, made a comment about me watching my weight. Then yesterday, my dad came over and tried to make a joke about me being fat. I cried all night and it ruined me and my husband's anniversary plans. Today (of all days) this coworker I never talk to says "time to hit the treadmill." I'm alternating between laughing and crying because what pot-bellied, santa claus wannabe thinks that is a smart thing to say to a pregnant lady??
I'm just surprised I guess because after everything we've been through to get here, I thought my family would be a source of positivity and happy all the time. The most hurtful part is that they keep saying things AFTER I told them to stop. Also, I haven't gained that much weight! I mean people shouldn't say crap regardless, but i still wear pre-pregnancy pants (unbuttoned lol) and pre-pregnancy tops as long as they are long enough to cover my maternity band. ALSO I'M PREGNANT.
My wonderful husband is going to call my parents and tell them to knock it off. Which should do the trick. But I'm sad because I'm very, very close with my parents, and it's gotten so bad that now I don't share any part of the pregnancy with them. I just want to avoid the topic entirely because of where it may lead. And that just sucks, because I've been looking forward to this for 3 years and now they are completely out of the process. I had a friend that did IVF also and her parents drove her to tears over the name she picked out for her son. 100% normal name, they just didn't like it. I just don't understand how you can't be 100% happy for other people who have struggled so much.
/end rant
//totally wearing a bikini to the beach this weekend
TTC since June 2011
DH: perfect SA
Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility
IUI or IVF in December
Re: AW...weight
***Losses mentioned.*** TTC #1 since May 2012. Me: 37, OH: 41. Ectopic August 2012 => tubal damage. Stage 1 endo removed June 2013. IVF #1 Oct/Nov 2013: Long Lupron with Gonal-F. 7R, 7M, 7F. 2 txfer@3d. Nothing frozen. => M/C @ 8 wks. Selected RPL panel all normal. Very hyper and brittle response to stims. IVF #2 (antagonist protocol) Feb 2014 => Converted to IUI (Perfect conditions). BFN. IVF #2.1 w/ new RE June 2014: Antagonist protocol. 33R, 31M, 30F, 19 blasts to test!!! I made it through without crashing!! Hats off to Dr. Fancypants!! ET of one 5AB blast. BFN. 13 10 CCS'ed snowflakes! FET #1 PUPO as of 7/29 Betas: 8/7@24, 8/9@97, 8/11@334 (etc.) Two sacs on 8/15, one seen on 8/18 after a bleed. U/s 8/25 (6+3) "perfect": 5.9 mm + HB@120bpm! U/s 9/4 (7+6): 15.9 mm + HB@172 bpm! Please, PLEASE stick this time!!!!
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
TTC on and off since 2005
July 2012: Infertility tests started at OB/Gyn, HSG and HSN all clear
Sept 2012: IUI #1 w/Clomid - BFN
Oct 2012: IUI #2 w/Clomid - cancelled due to cyst
Nov 2012: IUI #3 w/Clomid - BFN
Sept 2013: first appt with RE
Nov / Dec 2013: IVF #1 with ICSI split
Dec 6: Retrieval, 4 retrieved, 2 mature, 1 fertilized
Dec 11: Transferred 1 (Day 5)
Dec 30: HCG Beta, 4980. BFP!
1 little bean!
Next time one of them opens their stupid mouth, choose one of the responses below, based on your mood.
Dumb-headed Statement, "Well, you're certainly showing! It might be time to put that treadmill to use. Make sure you stay a healthy weight for the baby!"
Mood Response:
Crabby/annoyed - "I'm right on track, thanks for noticing. But keeping a healthy weight is always good advice. How's YOUR workout/diet/coffee fetish coming along?"
Jovial - "Hahaha! That's funny! You're SO funny. You WERE joking, right? Because no normal and polite person would ever say something derogatory about a pregnant friend/daughter's weight!"
Bland/surprised - <stare them dead in the eye> "Do you actually think that was an appropriate comment/question? Because it wasn't." <continue to stare at them until they uncomfortably back-pedal>
There are a lot more options, but that should get you started. Be happy - you're healthy and so is your baby.
My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins.
First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12
First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13
ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
IVF #3: NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0. Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN
IVF #4: (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
***Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...
IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
EDD 3/18/15!
IVF cycle 1 (Nov 2013)- freeze all d/t OHSS
FET #1-BFN
FET #2-BFP baby girl born Dec 2014
FET #3-Sept 2017 BFP but miscarried at 6 weeks
IVF cycle 2 (Oct 2017)- freeze all again d/t OHSS
FET #1 BPF, pregnant with a singleton due Sept 2018
TTC since Sept 2011, Unexplained IF
Oct 12 - Jan 14: 3 clomid/TI cycles, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 IUIs, 1 BFP (MMC @ 12w), 2 more IUIs
Feb 14: Gonal-f + IUI #5 = BFP! (EDD 11/4/14)
Baby boy arrived 11/13/14!
I've gotten some of the opposite comments - about how skinny I've stayed since being pregnant - and it also pisses me off. Don't praise me for that, dipshits. I'm eating plenty, trying to make healthy choices, exercising a bit, but it isn't about how I've managed to not put on weight. It's just how my body has reacted to pregnancy, and everyone's is different. It makes me really, really uncomfortable when someone comments about how I'm "all belly" and then starts making some nasty comment about some women "let themselves go" and then I want to hit them in the face. I do typically tell them that it's just how my body has gone, and I don't care if I gain lots of weight if it's what's necessary for my body to grow this child.
One of the things that pisses me off THE MOST is how everyone else seems to think it's okay to judge how much weight someone is or has gained or has lost. Most especially pregnant women. JUST SHUT UP PEOPLE! I see so many women on my BMB who complain about gaining weight, or worry about gaining weight - dude, you guys are growing a person! Eat healthy, exercise - those are generally good things to do no matter what, especially when pregnant, but stop focusing on the damned scale.
If someone finds they're eating too much mac 'n cheese and ice cream and sitting on the couch? Well, those two things should probably be improved upon, but not because of how much the scale says or because your cheeks got pudgy - because it's HEALTHIER to eat healthy and exercise, not because of how you look or what you weigh! UGH!
The most infuriated I think I've ever been on the subject was when I saw a magazine headline basically shaming Kim Kardashian (who I don't particularly like) and Jessica Simpson (who I also think is a bit nutty) by showing a picture of Catherine Middleton and saying basically how those two women could learn about how to stay "stylishly sleek" during pregnancy. WT-ever-loving-F is wrong with people?!!! Catherine Middleton had HG, I'm sure both she and her doctors wished she could gain a bit more weight. And the other two are growing human beings! Their boobs and bellies and butts get bigger because that's just what happens! After years of probably intense diets and exercise routines, can you blame a woman for lessening it a bit when pregnant, which is probably what her doctors wanted?!
I just... I can't with people. Weight shaming just pisses me off so much.
Off birth control March 2012 - Actively trying Sept 2012-April 2014
BFP on May 5th after Follistim & IUI #3
ME - 31, DH - 40
Married 06/25/2011, TTC since 03/2012
BFP #1 on 11/13/12 -- EDD 7/24/13 -- M/C (CP) on 11/21/12
BFP #2 on 7/21/13 -- EDD 3/29/14 -- M/C (CP) on 7/31/13
09/4/13 - 4/16/14 -- IUI #1 - 6 = BFNs
7/13/14 -- IVF #1 w/ ICSI
ER on 7/26/14 -- 20 R, 15 M, 11 F
ET on 7/31/14 -- 1 transferred (4bb); 8 frosties!!!
BFP #3 on 8/8/14 -- EDD 04/18/15
BETA #1: 473, BETA #2: 1009, BETA #3: 1975
** It's a BOY!!! **
Me:34 Type 1 Diabetes, Ankylosing Spondylitis, Hypothyroid DH:35 Perfect
DX: Unexplained IF
Many IUI's with various meds all BFFN
IVF #1 11/11 canceled due to OHSS
IVF #2 Feb/March 2012 ET of 2 on day 3 4/7 BFP! 5/1 u/s blighted ovum
IVF #3 July 2012 ET of 3 on day 3 7/24 BFP!
Healthy baby girl born at 36w4d on 3/9/13
TTC#3
IVF #5 June 2018- PGS planned, no surviving embryos
IVF #6 August 2018- ET of 2 on day 3 - Chemical pregnancy
IVF #7 August 2019-....?
FWIW, I'm 5'5, carrying twins, and went from 112lb at BFP to 152 lb at 27 weeks (last week). I think I'm beautiful and if anyone has any issues with that, I'll sit on them :-p
N14 Nov. Siggy: CELEBRATION!