I want everything new!

jaztastic

From reading the used breast pump thread I started thinking...

Am I the only FTM that wants everything brand new? Anyone else shopping for the quality items they like regardless of cost? Does anyone else feel this way or did you for your first? Am I being stuck up for feeling this way? I have gotten so many offers from friends to give me XYZ and my first instinct is to ask if it's new. (Although I don't)

I got a comment that my registry is expensive and that I should add cheaper options or go with cheaper alternatives... I didn't think so, it's just the items I want to purchase. Im not forcing anyone to buy anything from my registry. I just want what I want and have every intention of buying it myself. 

Thoughts??  

JsRib

I got a lot of new stuff for my first baby. The only things I bought used or hand me down was the changing table- bought of Craigslist (bought new pad and covers)and a exersaucer- my sister gave it to me.

I don't think it's stuck up to want to start fresh with new stuff for your new baby!

chickyclg

Girl I am the same way,  it took me long enough to get here that I want what I want, and nobody is changing my mind.  Now when I see something I like on sale, I just go ahead and buy it, if I don't think its something I will get at a shower.  

jaztastic

I'm probably going to end up on some random board with the "look at this ungrateful bitch" preface. I'm totally prepared to get flamed if need be. I just want opinions on how I'm feeling.

jennjilljo

Wash clothes, bibs and bottles are the cheap options I was totally like that with my first. We were making really good money before I became a SAHM so I felt like I shouldn't be buying used items that other families might actually need because it's all they can afford. I also wanted DS to have new things because I grew up poor so I never did. I don't think that there's anything wrong with that.

MarieH88

I want everything new as well!!! I was told the exact same thing - that my registry was expensive but then again someone told me I shouldn't be delivering at such an expensive hospital but I want what's best and what's reliable for my child especially with this being my 1st!

mands1125

Nope not just you. Had this exact convo with DH over dinner an hour ago

jaztastic

@chickyclg‌ I think IF may have something to do with it too... It's been such a long road. I just want to go all out.

krysmill

I'm the same way! I want all new stuff! I'm a bit of a germaphobe so the breast pump thread really gave me the ickys! This may be my only child so I want to give him/her the best!

Ducktale

I can't relate at all! I mean, some stuff I want new. But other things...if I can get something that's still good quality used, awesome! Especially since you don't know what your baby's preferences are (I hear they're very picky creatures), might as well try out some borrowed things before you buy.

mahalo3

I want everything, for the most part new, especially a breastfeeding pump. I would put cheaper items on you registry for people to be able to spend what they feel comfortable spending on a gift. Just return all of those items after your shower to put toward all the items you would rather have.

scahlin

I think its just a personal preference. I am willing to take anything except the car seat and crib if its a good price and gently used. I decided on the products I wanted and then I go looking for those items. I have gotten many items from garage sales and craiglist.

jaztastic

Ducktale said:

I can't relate at all! I mean, some stuff I want new. But other things...if I can get something that's still good quality used, awesome! Especially since you don't know what your baby's preferences are (I hear they're very picky creatures), might as well try out some borrowed things before you buy.

Good point... I'm trying to be rational, but I'm having a hard time letting go.

chickyclg

jaztastic said:

@chickyclg‌ I think IF may have something to do with it too... It's been such a long road. I just want to go all out.

Exactly what I was thinking, my thought is we only have 1 snowflake left, and what if this is my only chance to baby shop like this.  I may make a huge FTM mistake and register for everything they tell me to, but oh well.  We have plenty in saving that was put there just for baby shopping.

cls78

I just got a brand new medela pump in style advanced from a garage sale group on FB for $30!! (so don't not look at garage sales etc).

Not that you should go with cheaper alternatives, but maybe add some cheaper priced items to your registries. (clothes, toys, etc).

Love PBK, but will not be getting nursery furniture or big ticket items there. As my husband keeps telling everyone we got twins coming! lol

jaztastic

@cls78 do you think twins vs singleton has influenced your choices? I know my 1st pregnancy with twins I was all about being reasonable and fairly cheap. Not so much this time. But I can't tell if it's loss + TTTC making me feel this way, or if it's solely not being pregnant with twins.

mishka29

With my first everything was a hand-me-down - except the crib, sheets, change pad. To me it didn't make sense to buy things new when .i could get them for free. But im cheap like that I don't understand getting everything new but I also don't understand waiting to find out the sex! Everyone has different wants, needs and ways of doing things. Like you said, you are not expecting people to buy it all for you so then theres no issue.

jaztastic

I'm very cheap on a daily basis... I shop Walmart, eBay, 2nd ave for myself on a regular. I refuse to buy Kotex or Tampax, because Equate has a version just as good. But for some reason I can't bring myself think the same way for others. I love splurging on other people. It makes me feel good. Lol Dolce will be a victim of my splurging.

toadandbug12

I want everything new too. The only items I want used are baby clothes.... I'm planning on going to a consignment shop and buying some. But I'm sure I will get gifted a ton of clothes too.

angelg3134

I want everything new and I don't feel bad about it. I have a co worker who keeps offering me items and I just don't push her to bring them. It's my first, so I feel like I want to experience it all. Even if it's opening a damn box and building something! I think it's totally okay to feel this way.

HerHighness

Some things i needed new and some things i was okay with used. When i was pregnant with dd I actually bought a ton of clothes at a yard sale (my mothers neighbor so i knew the family) but over half of them were either new or worn once. Awesome expensive stuffs for a quarter! Jackpot!

rosieo52

Register for what you want! Maybe what others consider pricey, may be right on budget for someone else. It's your registry and your baby you can pick out what you want. Like you said, no one has to purchase off your registry. For our wedding registry DH's family barely got anything off our registry so I just returned the stuff and put it towards what I wanted! I'll admit it drove me nuts, because I registered for reason. But it all worked out in the end.

mmariel

If my FI wasnt so cheap and we weren't having to pay for a wedding too, I think I would want all new stuff. Luckily my cousin has 3 year old twins and she took really good care of their stuff and I know where it came from. Stuff that really doesn't matter like the high chair, swing, bouncy thing and some clothes. I dont think you sound like an ungrateful bitch. You just want what you want!

cls78

I am usually a bargain shopper, so I would still look for deals with a singleton. Some things I will splurge on, so I do try to find deals on what I can.

Nothing wrong with wanting everything new and going all out either! If you can afford to and it makes you happy I say go for it!

Ducktale

I don't think there's anything wrong with buying new if you can afford it. It's just NMS. I can totally understand that IF and losses would impact this.

jaztastic

Follow up: for those who don't mind used items... What items are you okay with being used vs not being used?

Clothes I can understand especially if not worn very much, because kids grow super fast. 

What else? 

aggiebug

I am getting a ton of stuff from my siblings as they are both done having kids and I am thrilled.  

We will get a new crib, car seat, strollers  but a lot of the other stuff I am excited to get hand me downs.

Especially things like bottles which babies can be so picky about, my brother has several types to try so that is really nice.  

I don't see any problem with wanting mostly new stuff, but I am happy to save that for college  or vacations. DH and I are fairly frugal people though.

ordinary1

I wanted everything new with my first, but I also shopped sales a lot. However there were some things I wanted regardless of price.

For your registry, I would suggest adding some cheaper things. Things like bibs, pacifiers, and first aid things are pretty cheap, useful, and help give a variety in prices.

kefttsc

I'm registering for everything under the sun because with twins I couldn't stand to have mismatched cribs, etc.  Clothing, I am HAPPY to have all the handmedowns I can get my grubby hands on. 

I am keeping my eyes open for awesome things on craigslist and Facebook, and if I find things, I will remove it from the registry then.

cls78

I bought a almost new baby swing at a garage sale for $15 a few years ago for my niece. You would be surprised how much new/barely used baby items you can get cheap at a garage sale.

I wouldn't buy a used car seat or bath tub.

Ducktale

No used bath tub? Those are like, plastic?

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Irishcurls

Hmm for me it's a bit of both, but not from a "ew yuck" standpoint. Just from a specific preferences standpoint. 

Clothes, lightly used shoes, one of those playmats with the toys above them, a swing, a bumpo, an exersaucer, a pack n play or rock n play lightly used-- all totally fine in my book. 

Bottles, pacis, the particular stroller I want (just because I don't see many of them used) all will be new. I feel like there is no end to the amount of money a child will cause me to hemorrhage over the next 18 years so I'm totally good on buying used quality stuff. 

Ducktale

Clothes for sure, but also swings/bouncy seats/jumperoos/exersaucers/bassinets/bumbos etc. although I'm thinking of this more from friends/family members. From a garage sale, I'm not sure. Clothes and cloth diapers, and pretty much anything I can put in the laundry or thoroughly santize I guess.

jaztastic

@ChickenOnSunday‌... I have been offered a bobby, 2 high chairs, an infant car seat (because the kid just upgraded to a bigger one), I've gotten a lot of offers for clothes but people are waiting for me to announce the sex. Most times I get "let me know as soon as you find out what you are having, because we have so much boy/girl stuff you can have" 

BeckyP005

jaztastic said:

@chickyclg‌ I think IF may have something to do with it too... It's been such a long road. I just want to go all out.

See I think the same way but MH is not on that page This part makes me mad because we spent so much on having this baby that now I can't go crazy on stuff.

BeckyP005

I cringe at garage sales. Guess I'm a snob. I'm sure it might change later down the line. I will most def use clothes from my friends if I had any!

chickyclg

One thought though, I would take used stuff for my moms house. The lady has gotten crazy baby fever, we are giving her our current nursery so she only has to buy another crib and mattress. But I don't think it's a bad thing either if grandma doesn't have to spend a fortune.

jaztastic

I really really wanted people ask that people make donations on our behalf instead to Resolve instead if buying us stuff. But my mother had a mini fit. She basically said that 1) no one even knew about out IF because I was so tight lipped about it, so it may come off confusing to some 2) we have a lot of friends and family that want to get us stuff so we should let them. DH and I decided that anything we get that we registered for, we would use that money and make a donation ourselves. So now I have this whole registry thing to seriously think about, and it makes me feel like I have to change what I want so other people can be more comfortable getting me something.

BeckyP005

chickyclg said:

One thought though, I would take used stuff for my moms house. The lady has gotten crazy baby fever, we are giving her our current nursery so she only has to buy another crib and mattress. But I don't think it's a bad thing either if grandma doesn't have to spend a fortune.

I agree too. My friend told me I can have certain things that were at her mom's house for my MIL's but I'm hoping they don't smell like smoke!!