Late Term and Child Loss

~ Loss Check-In ~

Hi ladies, I hope you have been kind to yourselves this week.  

Welcome to the check-in! I am sorry to have to welcome new loss moms this week but am so glad that you have found us. I hope we can bring each other some much needed comfort and support. Please feel free to join in when you are ready and share as much or as little as you wish. Also, if you have any questions you would like answered, just ask! Any lurkers out there please don't be shy, we would like to be able to support you too. 

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

QOTW: What is your favorite memory with your angel?
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Re: ~ Loss Check-In ~

  • **siggy warning

    Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?
    I'm doing therapy about every other week now, and that is helping. Planning to go out and visit Ana's grave today

    What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? I'm not sure really. I always put be healthy, and I'm doing well with that. I guess I need to keep up with the exercise. The weather has been nice lately...seems like we're getting an early fall so I have no excuse to not walk!

    QOTW: What is your favorite memory with your angel? Hmm. Probably singing to her, feeling her dance around, and reading to her. She was really responsive to us.

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    BFP# 1 7/7/12 Beautiful DD born still at 36 weeks 5 days on 3/2/13
    Diagnosed with PCOS in 2005. Started Metformin July 2013

    BFP # 2 8/7/14 EDD 4/22/15
    Please be our rainbow!!

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  • Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?
    I started to organize my "hoarding" room. It is the bedroom adjacent to out MBR and for months we debated which bedrooms to use for what. At 20w we decided to move my craft room to that room figuring 2 cribs + other furniture would be cramped. My DH had to move all of the other 3 spare bedrooms around due to where I wanted the nursery to be. Since our loss I've been using that room as a dumping ground for clean laundry I don't feel like putting away and anything else. I found all my ultrasounds and put them in the (real) nursery with the rest of their stuff.

    What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?
    I want and need to make a memory cabinet for in our bedroom, but I haven't found the kind of cabinet I had envisioned. (Wooden frame, glass doors, tall enough to hang their blankets/gowns/caps, place to put their birth announcement cards with hand & footprints, etc...) Open to suggestions if you have any leads!

    QOTW: What is your favorite memory with your angel?
    Probably our preconceived notion that Baby A (Anthony) would be obedient and mild-mannered while Baby B (Benjamin) would be the wild child. During ultrasound Anthony would give us the most perfect profile views and pictures, then they would move to the right and Benjamin would be upside down, on his side, ready to party.

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    TTC since 10/2010
    IUIs # 1-5 = BFFN
    IVF # 1(July 2012) = BFN
    IVF # 2 (November 2012) = BFP (MIssed MC D&C @ 8w3d on 1/10/13)
    IVF # 3 (June 2013) = BFN 
    IVF # 4 (September 2013) = BFP Fraternal twin boys! (Loss at 21w6d due to IC on 1/26/14...devastated.)
    3/21/14--TAC (transabdominal cerclage) w/Dr. Davis in NJ
    IVF # 5 (May 2014) = BFN
    FET (August 2014) = BFN

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  • What steps have you taken towards healing?

    Today dh and I talked to his brother and mil and fil about our plans for Christmas. We were firm about the fact that we know it will be difficult and don't want to commit to plans. We don't know what we will need/ want to do but we know we don't want to feel like we have to do anything for anyone other than dd. Bil took it well. Mil kept saying she doesn't know how we would be able to tell what we need but then saying she doesn't want to leave us to see bil. It didn't matter how many times we told her to do whatever she wanted. The important thing is, dh and I told her what we wanted and didn't cave.

    What is the next goal you have set for yourself?

    I am working on being healthier. I also need to finish my pregnancy scrapbook for Ben and I. I finally got the last of the pictures in.

    What is your favorite memory with your angel?

    We did an elective 3d ultrasound early (which we are now really thankful for since we wouldn't have had it otherwise). We invited our families and found out that Ben was a boy. While the tech was looking around our families could see his face on a big screen. Dd, wearing her pink tutu and tiara, pointed out his facial features with her wand. It was so precious. We have it on video on dh's phone.
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  • @shandorfml2 - I'm glad you're getting good walking weather!  It has been in the upper 90s and miserably humid here.
    @Maybe Joleisa - A memory cabinet is such a good idea!  I'd love to see a picture when you finish it : )
    @lexusolsen - What a beautiful memory.  I am glad that you have that all on video.

    Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 
    I went to support group on Thursday.  It is always a healing experience to talk to other parents.

    What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 
    School started up this week, so I am trying to stay on top of things and not fall behind.  It is easy to not care much about graduate school right now, but my husband won't let me quit.

    QOTW: What is your favorite memory with your angel? 
    We used to sit out on the patio in the sunshine and she absolutely loved it.
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  • Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 
    We have moved into our new home - just got internet. So glad to be back on this board:)
    What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 
    I want to make a scrap book with pictures during my pregancy, ultrasound pics, and pictures of our son. I'm working on getting all the pictures and things together.
    QOTW: What is your favorite memory with your angel?
    Feeling his kicks, punches and flips and all the time I spent rubbing him/ my belly.
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