Let's talk about alcohol

luckylady18

I've been wanting to post this for a while but I know it's controversial so I've held back. But I cant take it any longer!

I REALLY miss wine. Some of my friends have drank here and there during their pregnancies - later on and small amounts at a time, and that's what they were comfortable with. Other moms I know didn't risk it and that's what they were comfortable with. I see both sides.

On Monday at my 20 week appointment my doctor told me that at this point I can have a half a glass once or twice a week and it would do no harm. I'm still torn about it though - I'm not sure what I'm actually comfortable with. Part of me feels like my desire for red wine should mean nothing because the baby is clearly more important. The other part of me keeps thinking that women in Europe regularly drink wine through their pregnancies and it's not a big deal there.

What are people's opinions on this? I'm curious to know. 

misslizzy82

I have an ounce or two about once a week right now at 17w.  I sip it really slow and make it last   If you're not comfortable, I'd say don't do it.  You have to do what's within your comfort level. 

courtstuff89

In my second pregnancy I had 1 glass a week the last 4 weeks of my pregnancy. It was the only thing that seemed to help me sleep and get a solid night rest.

MoJo2015

I am comfortable having a little here and there. I just drink it slowly and make sure I don't feel it if that makes sense. I only want to taste/enjoy it and not get a buzz. Sometimes that means I have a sip or two and that seems like all I can handle and other times I can have a little more.

luckylady18

OK it definitely sounds like having a bit here and there is something people do. This is good I like the idea of measuring it out so that I dont overdo it. I probably wouldnt even feel buzzed from 1 glass. But I'd probably limit to a half a glass at a time, to be safe, and b/c that's what the dr said. 

Thanks! Mmmm...wine....

MichaelSC28

lol...welcome to my battle of the past few weeks. I have had the same convo with my Dr and he stated the same thing a glass of wine every now and then, let me specific 5 oz of wine, is fine. He also stated that some orange juices are higher in alcohol content than that of non-alocholic wine.

With this knowledge in tote.. I have decided that a half a glass of wine, which i have non-alcoholic ( I know there is some alcohol in it) on the occasional dinner is fine. If I don't have my non-alcoholic I will drink regular usually red, half a glass.  

 

Stargirlb

I have a half glass maybe every few weeks. I've never been much of a drinker and I find it easy to limit my intake. If you have trouble stopping and limiting intake, or find you might think about it every day, it would be best to abstain. Otherwise, I'm an advocate of your own comfort level.

MusicFanatic

Personal decision

At this point, I would likely not be opposed to a little wine here and there. Moot point, as I dislike it (I'm more of a hard alcohol lover, which I won't do when pregnant) but I would have a bit.  My previous midwife actually encourages wine in labor, FYI  She says it can help relax your muscles and self and move things quicker.

MoJo2015

I will add that your tolerance before pregnacy and during may be a lot different. I would never have been buzzed on one glass but sometimes now even a couple sips of red wine goes straight to my head so I know I can't do any more.

luckylady18

@MichaelSC28 - Non-alcoholic wine? I haven't even heard of that! Isn't that just grape juice?

shannjohnston

I've had a small glass a few times so far, and did with my first as well. Women have been drinking almost as long as they've been having babies, so I'm going to trust collective history.

As you mentioned, the fear in North American culture that anything and everything is terrible and dangerous to our baby becomes disproportionate after a while. That said, it's unethical to test limits and drugs and such in pregnant women, so often the only official recommendation is "zero", because there is no scientific data to back up anything else.

luckylady18

@musicfanatic - I think I love your midwife.

MichaelSC28

@lauren.Shap - lol...well I guess kind of sort of maybe...I will have to look at the one in my fridge and let you know the name. It tastes like wine and not grape juice. Its taken the edge off for me and well I feel less guilty. But you can do a regular wine occasionally if you are keeping it to like 5 oz.

joujouwish

I've had a glass of wine or a beer (max 2 a week) since the start. Just got back from the anatomy scan and was told baby is PERFECT and GORGEOUS. I also have a friend that is a nurse who works with people with drug/alcohol addictions and said she's seen some ridiculous alcohol addictions that don't even impact a baby at all. You REALLY have to be a ridiculously ridiculous alcoholic for it to impact the baby in her eyes.

Also, to reference the book- The Panic-Free Pregnancy: An OB-GYN Separates Fact from Fiction on Food, Exercise, Travel, Pets, Coffee, Medications, and Concerns You Have When You Are Expecting - talks about this topic here:

Edit: Wrong link: Look for page 122: https://books.google.com/books?id=9YJ6aXXZZmoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=panic+free+pregnancy+alcohol&source=bl&ots=Na8kVeAot7&sig=xQHYWuVRAphHd33QpjaQni9Cxys&hl=en&sa=X&ei=9sT0U76MC8SBygTYj4DoAQ&ved=0CB0Q6AEwAA#v=onepage&q=panic free pregnancy alcohol&f=false

MichaelSC28

Oh I should say this was at a wedding and had a full glass of red wine through the evening and by like 2 hours in I was feeling something...it was crazy. Amazing how your body gets unaccustomed to alcohol within like 4 months! BUBBLY is even worse...half a glass made me feel a lil off.

Lola918

I've had a couple of sips of my husband's glasses of wine here and there, mostly since second trimester - my general rule (mostly my own non-medical invention) is that all the really important organs and such developed during first tri, so now he's mostly growing and more resilient. So I can use my best judgement instead of following all rules meticulously.

I'd never thought about asking my doctor about alcohol consumption, but now I will! And definitely follow your doctor's advice rather than the opinion of us internet experts! ;-)

So celebrate that half glass, it's awesome!

MusicFanatic

lauren.shap said:

@musicfanatic - I think I love your midwife.

Right? Unfortunately, I no longer see her because I moved. I see my new one tomorrow. I should ask her views on this.

lavet22

I had one glass of wine at my brothers wedding (I was 15wks).  With DS1 and DS2, I didn't have any, but with DS3 I had 2-3 glasses during the course of the pregnancy (one at a time, obvs).  Don't chug it, sip with dinner.  I usually "save" my glasses for a special occasions or a particularly stressful day.  I figure the effects (if any) from 1 glass of wine is better than continuing to be extra stressed out.  My DH and I have discussed it and neither one of us has an issue with 1 glass here and there.

If you are not comfortable with it, don't do it.  I, personally, don't see a problem with a glass of wine here and there, but I think it's up to you and your DH to decide whats right for you during this pregnancy.

Beauxbaton

I don't and won't during pregnancy simply because I was never a person. Who drank an occasional glass. Most of my drinking was limited to get togethers , parties, celebrations, things like that. Also because I prefer mixed drinks (preferably vodka) over other alcohols.

I think I'd you are comfortable with just having a half a glass of wine once or twice a week then go for it.

jjcruiks

I WISH I could have a glass here and there... I get so buzzed from the smallest amount of wine (cheap date alert). I never thought of the shot glass thing... That's a great idea! I could handle that!!

TXUltraRunner

I often have a glass of wine or a pint of beer with dinner. I see no problem with it, I've done my research and so has my husband. We are both comfortable with the decision and I do not feel the need to preface my choices with anything in parenthesis trying to downplay it. My baby has been healthy and on target with growth at all the scans. I have bigger problems to worry about than the occasional glass of wine or beer. 

candacemg1, I also enjoyed reading the book "Expecting Better." I'm a numbers person and I like to see clear, statistical evidence of things. 

MusicFanatic

ExcitedMama2 said:

MusicFanatic said:

Personal decision

At this point, I would likely not be opposed to a little wine here and there. Moot point, as I dislike it (I'm more of a hard alcohol lover, which I won't do when pregnant) but I would have a bit.  My previous midwife actually encourages wine in labor, FYI  She says it can help relax your muscles and self and move things quicker.

Do you like Baileys?  If so...you should try this "wine"...this is one of my favorite parts of Michigan life.

https://shop.roundbarnwinery.com/DiVine-Black-Walnut-Creme-p144.html

I made cookies with these as well -- so delicious.

I do! And that actually sounds devine. 

I've had some "non alcoholic" beer here and there in the past few weeks. It tastes kinda watery.

joujouwish

MusicFanatic I drank O'Douls - alcohol free beer- (sp?) all weekend while camping and it wasn't terrible. Helpful for social drinkers before pregnancy to not feel awkward ha!

Edit- Perhaps its very low alcohol, not alcohol free...

luckylady18

DH suggested buying some non-alcoholic beer but I vetoed that for 2 reasons - 1) although I like beer, it's not really what I'm craving, and 2) I feel like we'd buy a 6 pack and I'd hate it. I think it would taste watery.

I may change my mind about that when football is on (not preseason) - I usually drink more beer during football season! haha

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UberBiz

I can't really contribute since I've been sober now over 2yrs (to support FI and his sobriety), but when I was pregnant with my daughter, I did indulge in a small glass of red wine every now and again during the last half of the pregnancy. I always felt guilty afterward, though, even though it was a tiny bit and it was ok to have, so I didn't do it very often.

peggels24

I've been to two weddings and at both weddings, I've had a glass of champagne.  I'll probably have a glass of wine here and there over the holidays and perhaps on our anniversary - 10th anniversary is 10/10

MusicFanatic

joujouwish said:

MusicFanatic I drank O'Douls - alcohol free beer- (sp?) all weekend while camping and it wasn't terrible. Helpful for social drinkers before pregnancy to not feel awkward ha!

Edit- Perhaps its very low alcohol, not alcohol free...

This is what I've been drinking. Labatt also has a non-alcoholic one. (in Canada, anyway) - this one tastes a bit better.

motherboy

I've taken sips of MH'S beer. That's probably all I will do, since (UO alert!) Beer> wine imo.

@calindi‌ I just brought my friend, who recently had a baby, a dinner I made for them and a big thing of the Pumpking ale. I've never tried that one but love pumpkin beer. She was very appreciative and said it was great! I want to have one, a full one. I'll need to remember it for next year.

MarxieVonTrapp

I can understand why pregnant women drink.  I don't judge, or at least I try not to.  I have personal experience that keeps me on the wagon.

My sister, however, drank through all three of her pregnancies and two of her kids have health issues--one, a serious heart condition that can be caused by maternal drinking that has resulted in severe developmental delays and the other one, we strongly suspect has FAS.  

To me, it's not worth it.  I can give up wine, liquor, and beer for a few months to do what I can for my baby.  But my personal experience has colored my opinion, and no one else has that.  I didn't think much of a glass of wine here or there until I saw how my sister's kids have been affected by her drinking. How much did she drink?  I don't know.  But enough to make me stop drinking for the duration of my pregnancy.

cassied7

I haven't this time around and probably won't. I was never a big drinker so it doesn't bother me a all. Last time, I called out of work the day before I went to the hospital because I had no shoes that fit. I was feeling stressed so I sat outside on my patio and had a glass of red wine, which I normally hate, and drank the whole thing. At at time, it was the most delicious thing I have ever tasted in my life and for a half hour, I felt GOOD. . So I'm not against it, I just don't have to urge to drink anything.

luckylady18

Thank you for sharing, @Marxievontrapp. I'm sorry to hear about your sister's kids. That's sad. 

becks2012

Hmm... 

I eat pizza.  Therefore, the honey and I split a beer.  I've also been known to have a small glass of wine with dinner now and then. 

Kiddos 1 and 2 didn't turn out to be cantaloupes.  I doubt this one will either. 

Also, I home brew.  Gotta taste the in process stuff!  What it has a wonky wild yeast strain that got in somehow!  I need to know if I need to dump it. 

LuckyPenny1231

I've started having 3 oz of wine every other week. I figure 6 oz of wine per month won't cause any problems. I have it after dinner and sip it slowly.

MarxieVonTrapp

lauren.shap said:

Thank you for sharing, @Marxievontrapp. I'm sorry to hear about your sister's kids. That's sad. 

Thanks.  It is sad.  

KnitPixy

Personally I'm abstaining the whole pregnancy.  Wasn't a big drinker to begin with thanks to the diabetes so it hasn't  been too hard (except when DH sends me to buy the booze for a dinner party).  I had three friends in high school that had FAS and that experience has coloured my opinion.  That and in my mind I've got enough factors against me during this pregnancy I don't want to throw in another variable.

That being said I don't judge women for the occational drink during pregnancy (more than likely I'm envious ).  I think as PP's has said it is all about your personal comfort level.  I would also add that the amount of cravings you are having probably plays a roll as well.  I know I would me more inclined to cave in myself if I was constantly getting the "I really want a drink" cravings.

LaStella25

I'm a total wino.

I thought for sure that I would have one glass of red wine a week once I hit the second-tri.

Now that I'm pregnant, I just don't see the big deal with it.  My DH poured me a 1/4 glass of wine, I had 3 sips or so, and my heart was racing, so I made him finish it.

If he is drinking wine, I will usually just take a sip or two.  But that is all I can handle.  I just get too nervous.  I have friends that drink a glass or two of wine and I don't judge them.  But for me, I just don't feel right.

tarala

Definitely a personal decision. I thought that once I hit second tri I would be a little more open to it. 3 1/2 weeks into this trimester and all I have had is a teeny sip of champagne to celebrate our 5 year anniversary.

Maebb

@MarxieVonTrapp‌, sorry about your sister and her children. That is sad. I do wonder how much and how often she drank.

I've had talks with DH about it, and I do have a small amount occasionally. I would be devastated if the baby had some kind of health issue that could be attributed to alcohol, and I know I would blame myself, so maybe I should abstain completely.

I don't know. I definitely don't judge if people have small amounts every few weeks or something.

amiej1227

When my husband orders a mixed drink like margarita on the rocks it looks good, but I'm only half interested, so I don't worry about it too much. Though I do love wine I'm not one to drink a lot.

So if you are comfortable with it, go for it

MahriM23

I have an occasional 4-5oz glass of wine. I always make sure I eat first and drink a lot of water because I'm always afraid of getting dehydrated. I do the same thing when I drink coffee though.  Mostly this post makes me think about Sushi. I want it soooo bad. Anyone out there indulging in the sush? If it's from a reputable place is it ok?