Single Parents
Jasminectwood
member
Single and Pregnant
Jasminectwood
member
Hey ladies! I am 30 years old and pregnant with my first child. I am 23 weeks pregnant and the father of my baby has left. I'm sure there are other women in my situation, I just couldn't find a thread on it. Does anyone else need some support right now? I know I sure do! I would love to hear your stories!
-Jasmine
-Jasmine
Re: Single and Pregnant
There are a few pg women on here now that I am sure will share their story. Best of luck to you.
I myself Have a 3.5 and almost 2 year old and am going through a very nasty divorce for 6 months now.
Welcome to the board! Tell us about yourself
I, too, am pregnant and single. I'm 26 weeks today (YAY!). I made the decision to leave the baby's father but he has since decided to ignore all phone calls and responsibilities that he promised to do. At this point the next communication he will get form me is court paperwork for child support...if I can find him since he didn't give me his address :-w
Tell us a little about yourself!
@Amandrae529 do you know an address for a family member. I had to have bd served at his parents. Or if he works they can find him that way. They have ways of finding people
Hi- welcome.
My situation is different- I have a 2.5 YO and recently filed for divorce, but I think we are all here to give and get support.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
@MinnesotaMomma91 I know the town that his dad lives in (his mom passed away a few years ago) and I know that if I scroll back through texts, I'll find his exact address. I also know the name of the company he works for so I'm sure I can find that address using Google. One more thing...I work for the local Sheriff's Office...so I'm sure I can find out more than I even WANT to find out lol And the guys that know my situation are just WAITING to say something to him.
My BD and I met online and he moved to Indiana from Colorado, for me when I found out I was pregnant. After we lived together for about a month or two I started finding out that he had been lying to me about a lot of different things. Some things stupid and some things important. Once I confronted him, he left. He decided that he would rather just leave than to explain anything or try to make things work. I'm just heart broken. And am having a hard time. He was the one that was so happy about the pregnancy. He was the one who wanted this baby. I wasn't sure if I ever wanted children. Either way, I feel like I'm just stuck with an everyday reminder of how he abandoned me and left me. I'm trying to separate him from the baby and just come to terms with everything. Any advice or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated!!
1) I believe that you don't know someone until you live with them. Their quirks and flaws are more apparent at that point. So though your relationship may have been great prior to living together, you began to see some flaws (his lying, for one) and needed to call him out on it. Kudos to you for doing so because you (and your child) don't deserve to be lied to.
2) He may have said he was happy about the pregnancy and he might have SAID he wanted this baby but his actions have since proved otherwise. It's all fun and games...until it's not. If he REALLY wanted this baby and if he was REALLY happy about this pregnancy, he wouldn't have bolted at the first sign of trouble. You need to keep reminding yourself of that because...
3) This baby NEEDS YOU! The main reason I kicked BD out was because it wasn't just me anymore. I immediately started thinking about the baby. I immediately started thinking "Would I want him/her to see me get treated this way? If I'm having a boy, do I want him to grow up and treat another woman this way? If I'm having a girl, do I want her to put up with this nonsense?" The answer was no, I didn't. And the more energy I put into an unhealthy relationship, the less energy I'd have to give to this little boy.
This little life will rely on you from now on. Try to do things to connect yourself to the baby. Do you know what you're having? Maybe naming him/her and saying it out loud as often as possible will help? Perhaps buying a thing or two for him/her?
I found it was easiest to seperate ds from bd by thinking about ds as his own person. I called him by a nickname before i knew he was a boy and then he became b. Even now i get snippy when people refer to him as "ben" because "ben" is bd.
Ftr i almost lost my bananas when bd called ds ben jr.
Not trying to disregard any of your feelings but...there are lots of women that wish nothing more than to have a baby. Be thankful for this blessing. Everything else will fall into place. You'll see.
I actually copied my story from a previous post (as it took so long to write out hahahaha and will post it after this)
But just know you can absolutely do this, and it's awesome to have your family behind you
Pregnancy alone is scary and I know sometimes you may feel like your missing out on the connection of your partner and you bonding over the growing baby, please note that 9 times out of 10 this is not the case with couples having babies together!
You will romanticize, you will have this idea in your head, but everyone of my married friends had no more support than I did from their partners who couldn't even comprehend the idea of a tiny human growing inside them than me with all my family members being there
Your ex is not worth any stress on that gorgeous bundle! What you need to do now is think of yourself in the strongest longest relationship you will ever have with a stronger love than any other experienced and you need to fight to protect that sacred everlasting love with you daughter
You couldn't protect your heart from him but you know what you can do, protect her and through her you will draw a strength you never knew you had, if you do everything for her to ensure her safety, her life and her love you will provide the strongest safest place for her and yourself you never knew you had
Trust in the plan and focus on the blessing provided, I've said it before but my brother in law told me when I was pregnant and I said I was worried to raise a boy on my own, president obama was raised by a single mother and he is the president of the united states!
Single mothers can do a job just as good and sometimes better than any two parent family!
You have the music in you
Wishing you a very safe and healthy pregnancy and new life together with you little lady
Go to theknot.com, log in with your bump name and password, there's an area for "my account" where you can change your own user name
Or try tagging at bump Jackie
@20thirteen got it. It should be changed in a bit... Thanks.:-)
I'm not doubting that he's the father, just FYI lol I'm flashing back to a story that happened with a (then) friend and my godson.
For 8 years we thought P was the dad of my godson but my friend H never went after him for CS because she didn't want him to have any legal rights to my godson. Why she decided after 8 years to do so is beyond me but she did. Just before the judge ordered the CS, he asked P if he would like a paternity test. In those 8 years, P had gotten married to the girl he cheated on with my friend. SHE said yes and a paternity test was done. Went a little something like this, I'm sure...
I was completely shocked at THAT phone call. My first thought was "this kind of shit only happens on Maury" haha
Nope hes not paying cs