STM+ Moms: things you are not looking forward to

digwriter

AF9211 said:

So I'm not really sure if this counts as something I'm not looking forward to, but I just can't shake the feeling that if we find out this baby is another girl, I won't feel the same about her as I do DD1. We have a special bond and she's my #1. I feel like if this baby is a boy, then we will have a relationship that's just as special as mine & DD's, but at the same time it will be different because he's my son and she's my daughter. Anyone else dealing/dealt with this? @thegoodpotato, I know you have 2 daughters and are expecting your 3rd little one, did you ever have any feelings like this? 

I have this exact same dear. I don't know how I could feel the same way about another little girl. Then I feel terrible for thinking that way.

michelle142

Lack of sleep

DS adjusting to the new baby

Pumping when I go back to work

Paying for 2 in daycare

AF9211

I'm not looking forward to being away from DD...my hospital stay with this baby will be the first time I'll be sleeping apart from DD. I'm not looking forward to feeling guilty about not being able to fully take care of my toddler while I'm recovering from a c-section. And I'm not looking forward to the judgy looks and pressure from nurses I'll be getting in the hospital when they learn this baby will be formula fed.

bionic4me

The epidural drip didn't work for me, so the anesthesiologist had to come in and manually put the medicine in the tube for me. So, I am afraid of that happening again.

Other things that I am not looking forward to are:

The non-stop visits - it seems like people forgot that I just came home from the hospital and needed rest to heal.

The emotions - Like someone else said, I felt like an incubator and my job was done once baby was born. It seemed like my feelings and needs were ignored.... I hit an emotional low after coming home from the hospital.

Always being tired with sleepless nights and restless days - hated having people tell me to sleep when baby slept. During the day, she only slept for about 10-30 minutes at a time which gave me enough time to eat something or take a shower.

Going back to work - it was torture taking my precious baby and handing her over to a stranger, so I could go to work. It's a hard transition for the first few months, but eventually becomes easier.

The struggle to breastfeed - after weeks of struggling, I finally decided to stop which was an emotional struggle with all of the pro-breastfeeding happening right now. I gave it an honest shot and felt like a failure. Yet, after making the decision and the switch to exclusive using bottles... life became easier for all of us as baby and I were less stressed.

And can't forget that first time getting out of bed at the hospital - that hurt so bad after my c-section.

 

bhjones1980

michelle142 said:

Lack of sleep

DS adjusting to the new baby

Pumping when I go back to work

Paying for 2 in daycare

THIS^^^^ all of this exactly!

bbergman

I wouldn't say I'm not looking forward to it, more that I'm incredibly nervous and anxious about it. Here's my list:

The first week of nursing (ouch, holy engorgement, my nipples are on fire)- I think this one can count as "not looking forward to" 

Being outnumbered big time (#3)

Labor going REALLY fast this time and not having enough time for an epidural 

Hubby having to go back to work right away and me being on my own with  3 kids ages 3 and under. 

KRMcD

anxiousmommy85 said:

I am one of those women who seems to love pregnancy even with all of its myriad discomforts, including labor, delivery, and its aftermath, so nothing there, though uterine massages and first postpartum bowel movements are definitely unpleasant. I'm concerned about Hobbit's sleep habits and DD's adjustment. She'll have been an only in the house for almost 5 1/2 years by the time LO arrives, so I'm sure that will be a little rough on her learning to share all her people and a chunk of her space. I also detest the belly and the baby touching, but I generally go with wearing warning signs and then letting others take a hint. For example, my out myself shirt is a tshirt that reads "touch the belly, lose a hand" and I'm hoping to make a sling with nursing cover for baby that comes with a "potentially breastfeeding" sign.

I was a little older than 5 1/2 when my sister was born and I absolutely loved her (still do!). Maybe get her a digital camera to take pictures of the baby and a baby doll so she can have a baby like Mommy. I remember the day she was born I was thinking it was the best day ever. Not only was I getting a new brother or sister, but I was also getting presents!

Oem617

I am worried about DH going back to work after only one week off. Last time it was summer and he was off for 2 months after baby came. Now I will have a toddler and a newborn and be alone (thankfully DS will be in daycare in the daytime) all day and some nights too. DH is finishing up his masters and that leaves me alone once a week putting DS and a newborn to bed, alone. Bathing and such. I'm really nervous about it. Luckly my mom will be helping me.

salbabe79

not a fan of the newborn phase.  and now doing it with a 2.5 year old