Interstate Private Adoption and Intro

dandywarhol

Hi.
Does anyone have any experience with an interstate private adoption? DH and I have a 14 month old daughter who was a micropreemie. Prior to her we had 3 losses and are pretty much guaranteed another high-risk pregnancy and potential loss. Given this possibility we have been discussing the possibility of adoption to expand our family. We informed my MIL of this possibility as DH and his 2 sisters are adopted. The other day she called us to say there is a woman at her church whose daughter may be looking to give up her child (as she's given up her previous 5 children). Obviously this is a HUGE maybe and we are not getting our hopes up but we are interested in the possibility.

So at this point I am more curious about what may be involved. The birth mom lives in Iowa and we live in NY. Prior to our micropreemie's birth we had met with an adoption counselor so are vaguely familiar with the process.

Thanks in advance.

Dr.Loretta

What's involved is you'll need to retain a lawyer in each state, one to represent each of you. You'll need to do a home study in your state. Assuming this is a go, you'd have to stay in the BM's home state after the birth while ICPC goes through (basically her state letting you leave with the baby, and your state allowing you in with the baby). Then termination of parental rights, post-placement visits, and finalization.

Agencies can sometimes also do this with/for you. it's called an identified adoption so the fees are lower.

Those are the bare bones. We are more than happy to answer specific questions.

dandywarhol

Thank you for the response! Do you have any thoughts on how long the process might take? The baby is due in mid-December. Should we start working on a home study now or can it wait a few months?

Again, I realize this is a long shot, but if it were to come to fruition, how long (days, weeks, months?) do you think we would need to stay in the birth mom's state?

Dr.Loretta

Do the homestudy now. It can take anywhere from weeks to months to complete. It also includes background checks, which can take 4-8 weeks.

Each state has a typical ICPC wait time. I'd consult with a lawyer or agency so you know what to expect. It can be days or a couple of weeks, there is no across-the-board timeline.

dandywarhol

Thanks for your advice. I truly appreciate it!